Descent, Mike Houtz [namjoon book recommendations TXT] 📗

I realize too late that there are no happy endings. There are only endings. As I lay here, drowning in my blood, I can only think “She forced me to this. I had to. This was my only way out. I’m done running from my pain; it’s time to end it.” My story isn’t some happy fairy tale. It’s not about the “Valiant knight that goes to save the princess.” It’s about my decent into the clawing madness that is my fragmented psyche. When I fell into my personal hell I found something in myself, something I didn’t know existed. I found an inner darkness that I both found fascinating, and horrifying. I found the capacity to kill, and the power to do it. Ah but I get ahead of myself. My name is Blake, if that name even holds meaning at this point, and this is my story.

Before I tell you my tale, why don’t I tell you a little more about myself. I lived on my family’s estate in the wilderness. I inherited the house from my father when he died, as he did from his father, and so on and so forth. Besides my fortune I was an average teenager. I went to an average high school, took normal classes, and got relatively decent grades. Granted I was distant, floating through life on my own little cloud of indifference. I didn’t have many friends. But that’s ok; I always told myself I didn’t need them. I only had one friend. He was the only friend I needed. He was my brother, Daniel. We had our fights and disagreements like all brothers, but we were close. After our parents were killed we only grew closer. The only thing we argued about was the inheritance. As the senior, I inherited the house and the fortune, while he inherited nothing. It was a harsh life, but we made it work.
I woke up one Monday to find and eerie stillness in the air. I couldn’t explain it. I was always more attuned to strange things like that. I felt as though there was something just out of my line of sight. Hanging just outside my perception. Watching me. Watching and waiting. What it was waiting for I didn’t know. The presence had always been hanging around me since I was a child. Today however there was something different. A sense of urgency came to mind.
“Daniel? You there man?” I called out. I heard a snarl coming from downstairs. Dropping to a crouch I made my way carefully down the steps and into the main hall. “D-Daniel!?” I cried out as I saw him face down in a puddle of crimson. I noticed almost too late the figure perched on his back, tearing away at his flesh. It had dead gray skin, with golden eyes and long skinny limbs. It swung its arm in my direction and made a grunting noise. The bastard was egging me on. Daring me to join poor Daniel. “Well” I said, “if you want a fight, you’ll have it.”
I rushed forward. I didn’t care that I was unarmed and unprepared. I only cared about getting that thing off my brother. I heard the presence at the back of my mind, screaming orders, I couldn’t understand it. But my body seemed to. The beast swung its long arm left, I feinted right, ducked under its guard, and my arm came up like a rocket. Except, it wasn’t a fist I saw, it was a dark, twisted copy of my hand, the nails sharpened to long claws, the fingers grown long and talon-like. “What in hell?” I wondered aloud. When my hand connected with the beasts jaw I quickly pulled away. I wasn’t expecting the rest of its head to come with. In a shower of blood the beast’s corpse fell still.
“Daniel! Daniel! Please be ok! Oh god, don’t leave me!” I pleaded. “You’re tough! Come on! Wake up! Please! Open your eyes! Wake up…” I cried. “B-Blake? I’m so cold…god it hurts…please…end it....”

I didn’t know what to do. My heart was beating so hard I couldn’t concentrate. The blood was rushing in my ears. I couldn’t kill my brother. How could I? But that’s when I heard the presence again. Calmly but surely, telling me what to do. Where to cut. How to make it quick. I couldn’t watch my brother suffer any longer.
I jabbed out my clawed hands at his throat. There was almost no resistance as the newly formed claws sliced through his jugular. I felt the heat of his blood on my hands. The saltiness of my tears as they ran down my face. I don’t remember how long I stayed there. Hunched over, crying over the loss of my only loved one. I don’t remember how my arm changed back. All the while though the presence was there… whispering words of encouragement.
“You did the right thing” it said. “He would have suffered if you let him go” it told me. It sounded so convincing. As though it had seen untold sadness, experienced excruciating grief. It made me want to listen. Want to give in to its every suggestion. I heard a kind of pity in its voice. I didn’t learn until later that it only masked its own predatory intentions. I remember getting up eventually, giving my brother a proper burial, burning the remains of the beast that attacked Daniel, and cleaning up the house. “There’s so much blood…so much…it isn’t coming off… why isn’t it coming off!?” I remember screaming to myself as I tried washing my dead brother’s blood off my hands. That’s when I first started losing myself to the madness. That’s also when the presence first began to slowly embed itself into my mind. Several months passed before I returned to school. The nearly empty flat was even more uninviting and dead then before. I drifted around my house. Waking up, eating my meals, and returning to bed. My actions were almost mechanical. I felt nothing.

I drifted by. Phasing in and out of reality, barely keeping conscious, it felt like I was seeing someone else control my body. I was more like a zombie than ever. Then I met her. She was the most amazing person I could possibly imagine. If beauty and kindness had physical form I imagine it would be her. The sight of her made my blood run cold and sent a chill down my spine.
I met her in third period at school after I started going again. She was new you see, hadn’t been at my school for the whole semester. She approached me, her long black hair flowing in waves behind her. “Hi, my name is Snow. I don’t really know anyone here but you seem nice, do you mind if I copy your notes for the chapter? I’m gonna need to study more if I have any hope of passing.” she asked. I couldn’t answer at first. I was unused to human contact, that I needed a second to collect my thoughts. “…uh yeah sure, that would be fine” I replied.
A shy smile appeared on her face. “um here’s my number, you should call me when you have the notes together…or just to talk…I don’t mind…I would love to get to know you more.” She blushed, “oh god I’m sorry, I’m rambling aren’t I? Wow that was awkward, I’ll just go now.” She started to turn away. “No wait! Don’t go! I don’t mind. Really, it’s nice having someone to talk to. Things have been rough for awhile.” I could feel my cheeks get hot; I could tell I was blushing badly, but she just smiled more than ever. The teacher called for us to go to our seats. She giggled and took the seat next to me. I smiled like an idiot for the rest of the day. But once I got home I could tell things were different. I felt the presence speak to me the way it did when Daniel was killed. It said I needed to protect her. It said she was in more danger then Daniel ever was. “Danger? Danger from what?” I asked in vain. I could feel it growing dormant again. Whatever secrets this thing had it was clear it had an agenda of its own. It was also clear that it played by its own rules. I may be its host, but I’m definitely not calling the shots.
I needed to know why it chose now to interact with my life. It never had before. It was as if the fight with the beast had been what it was waiting for. As if it knew that would happen. I wish I could tell you it was on my side. I wish I could tell you it was a benevolent spirit, just waiting for the right time to divulge some strange mind blowing revelation. But that isn’t the case. I could tell that it wasn’t telling me to keep me in the dark on purpose. There was something going on here, and its stranger then I could ever have imagined before.