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road to success in his particular line. This is a difficult thing to describe, but a
little observation and thought and practice along the lines laid down in the
preceding lessons will do much for you in this direction. A recent writer truthfully
says on this subject:"Suppose, for instance, you are in trade or a profession, and
wish to increase your business. It will not do, when you sell goods or services, to
make the mater a merely perfunctory transaction, taking the customer’s money,
giving him good value and letting him go away feeling that you have no interest in
the matter beyond giving him a fair deal and profiting thereby. Unless he feels
that you have a personal interest in him and his needs, and that you are honestly
desirous to increase his welfare, you have made a failure and are losing ground.
When you can make every customer feel that you are really trying to advance his
interests as well as you own, your business will grow. It is not necessary to give
premiums, or heavier weights, or better values than others give to accomplish
this; it is done by putting life and interest into every transaction, however small.
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"This writer has stated the idea clearly, forcibly and truthfully, and you will do
well to heed his advice and to put it into actual practice.
Another important point in Personality is Self-Control, particularly in the matter
of Keeping your Temper. Anger is a mark of weakness, not of strength. The man
who loses his temper immediately places himself at a disadvantage. Remember
the old saying:"Those whom the gods would destroy, they first make angry.
"Under the influence of anger a man does all sorts of foolish things that he
afterwards regrets. He throws judgment, experience and caution to the winds,
and acts like a crazy man. In fact, anger is a sort of madness – a phase of insanity
– if you doubt this look carefully at the face of the first angry man you meet and
see how irrational he looks and acts. It is a well-known fact that if one keeps cool
while his opponent is angry, he has decidedly the best of the matter – for he is a
sane man dealing with an irrational one. It is the better policy to allow the other
fellow to "stew in his own fat" of anger, keeping cool yourself at the same time. It
is a comparatively easy matter to cool down an angry man without becoming
angry with you – and as it takes two to make a quarrel, the matter is soon over.
You will find that a control of the outward expression will give you control of you
inner mental state. You will find that if you are able to control your voice, keeping
it calm, steady and low-pitched, you will not fly into a passion, and more than
this, you will find by so doing that the voice of the other fellow will gradually
come down from its loud, boisterous tones, and in the end both of you will be
pitching your voices in the same key – and you have set that key-note. This is
worth remembering – this control of the voice – it is a secret well worth knowing
and practicing.
While we are on the subject of voice, we would like to call your attention to a
further control of voice, or rather a cultivation of voice. A man having a well
controlled, even, pleasant voice has an advantage over others having equal
abilities in other directions, but lacking that one quality. The value of a vibrant,
resonant, soft and flexible voice is great. If you have such a voice, you are blessed.
If you lack it, why start to work and cultivate it. Oh, yes, you can! Did you ever
hear of Nathan Sheppard, the well-known public speaker? Then listen to these
words of his, telling of his natural disadvantages of voice, and how he overcame
them and became a great speaker. He says:"When I made up my mind to devote
my mind and body to public speaking, I was told by my teachers and governors
that I would certainly fail; that my articulation was a failure, and it was; that my
organs of speech were inadequate, and they were; and that if I would screw up my
little mouth it could be put into my mother’s thimble, and it could. Stinging
words these certainly were, and cruel ones. I shall never forget them; possibly,
however, they stung me into a persistency that I would have never known but for
these words. At all events, that is the philosophy of the ‘self made’ world of
mankind. I may not have accomplished much; I do not claim to have
accomplished much. It is something I have made a living out of, my art for twenty
years, and that I do claim to have done in spite of every obstacle and every
discouragement, by turning my will upon my voice and vocal organs, by
cultivating my elocutionary instincts and my ear for the cadences of rhetoric, by
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knowing what I and my voice and my feelings were about, by making the most of
myself. "After these words, anything that we might add regarding the possibility
of acquiring a good voice by will, practice and desire would be superfluous. Pick
out the kind of voice that you think best adapted to your work, and then cultivate
it by practice, determination and desire. If Mr. Sheppard could become a famous
public speaker with such obstacles as these, then for you to say "but I can’t" is to
stamp you as a weakling.
It has been suggested to us that we have a few words to say regarding the carriage
or physical bearing of the person, as an important part of Personality –
particularly in the phase of Walking. But we do not think that is necessary to add
to what we have said in this lesson regarding the subject, in connection with what
we have also said regarding the mental state of Self Respect. The main thing is to
cultivate the Mental State of Self Respect, and the rest will follow as a natural
consequence. Thought takes form in Action, and the man who has Self Respect
imbedded in his mind will surely so carry and demean him that he will give
evidence of his mental state in his every physical action, gesture, carriage and
motion. He must have it within, as well as without. One must pay attention to the
exterior aspect of course, particularly in the matter of dress. One should cultivate
Cleanliness and Neatness, of both body and clothing. To be well dressed does not
mean to me showily clad – in fact, the person who is best dressed is
inconspicuously dressed. Cultivate a quiet, refined taste, expressed in quality
rather than in showiness. And above all – be Clean.
In conclusion, let us impress upon you again and again that that which we call
Personality is but the outer mask of the Individual Within. The mask may be
changed by an effort of the Will, aided by an intelligent discrimination. First find
out what kind of Personality you should have, and then set to work to cultivate itto
grow it, in fact. Form the Mental Image of what you want to be – then think of
it – desire it ardently – will that you shall have it – then Act It Out, over and over
again; rehearsal after rehearsal, until you will actually materialize your ideal into
objective reality. Make a good mental pattern or mold, and then pour in your
mental material steadily, and slowly! From the mold will come forth the
Character and Personality that you desire and need. Then polish up this newborn
Personality until it becomes radiant with the brightness of Culture.
You can be what you want to be – if you only want to hard enough. Desire is the
mother of the Actuality. Remember once more the old rule – EARNEST DESIRE
– CONFIDENT EXPECTATION – FIRM RESOLVE – these are the three things
that lead to ACCOMPLISHMENT. And now that we have given you this little
Secret of Success – USE IT. "It is Up to You" to "Make Good. "We have "pressed
the button – you must do the rest!"
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An Afterword
On reading the foregoing pages after they have been set up in type, we are
impressed with the idea that in spite of our determination, as expressed in the
first few pages, not to attempt to lay down a code or rules or a course of conduct
which should be considered as an infallible Guide to Success – in spite of our
vowed determination not to pose as a teacher or preacher – we have nevertheless
managed to do considerable in the direction of "laying down the law" so far as is
concerned naming of things to be done, or avoided.
However, we feel that the advice given is good, and that the various examples
quoted are calculated to arouse within the mind of the reader the Spirit that leads
to Success. And, with this thought, we send forth these pages to those who may
attract them to themselves, or who may be attracted to them – under the Law of
Attraction. But we feel that we shall not have completed our task unless we, once
more, remind the reader that Success is not to be gained by a blind and slavish
following of anyone’s rules or advice, our own any more than any other persons.
There is no Royal Road to Success – no Patent Process by which the unsuccessful
are to be magically transformed into Captains of Industry or Magnates of Wall
Street. There is nothing more amusing, or pitiful, according to how one views it,
than the bulk of Success Talk given to the public by self-appointed teachers and
preachers. There is no one who can in a few pages point out to seekers after
Success an infallible method whereby each and everyone may attain the Success
and Attainment that their hearts crave. It is a cold, hard truth that each and every
man must work out his own salvation in the matter of Success. Rules and advice
may greatly assist – and they undoubtedly do this – but the individual must
accomplish the real work. He must carve out his own Destiny, and there is no
power above or below that will do the work for him if he refuses to perform it
himself.
The old saying that "God helps him who helps himself" is true in more senses
than one. It is true in the sense that the Higher Aid seems to refuse to come to the
assistance of one who is not willing to strike out for him and do his best. But it is
true in another sense – this Aid does come to one who will throw heart and soul
into the task set before him, and who will do each days work the best he know
how, with hope in his soul, and a confident expectation of better things right
ahead, around the turn of the road. The wise man is the one who takes
courageously the step right ahead of him, planting his foot firmly and confidently
upon it, although he is unable to see further ahead. To such a one step after step
is illuminated as he proceeds, and he reaches his goal, whereas the shrinking
ones, who have feared to take the obvious step because they could not see beyond
it, are still waiting for something to turn up. This waiting business is a poor policy
– as Garfield said:"Don’t wait for something to turn up – go out and turn
something up. "Take the step before you boldly and hopefully, and the next step
will then appear. The thing to do
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