If Not For The Knight, Debbie Boek [electronic reader TXT] 📗

early age simply because of the cruelty of the rest of the people in this village.

“Can I be your friend, Radolf?” Calder asked, rewarded by the happiness that lit the boy's face.

“Oh, yes,” he said excitedly. “I would like that.”

“Good, because every man needs a close friend, someone he can depend upon, right?”

“Right,” Radolf answered, not really understanding what he had just agreed to, but so happy with his new friend that it did not matter.

“But, won't you miss Durwin if you give him to me?” Calder asked, lifting RadoIf into his lap.

“Maybe I can still play with him sometimes?” he asked hopefully.

“I have a better idea, my little friend. Why don't you keep Durwin for now. When I feel sad, I will come and borrow him from you for a while.”

Radolf's little brows furrowed in thought and then he solemnly nodded his head.

“Then I take care of him till you need him?”

“Yes, and you and I, we'll take care of each other too, alright?”

They smiled at each other as Radolf held out his little hand. Calder engulfed it in his own and they shook on their new friendship.

Calder hugged him tightly and set him back down on the floor.

“Thank you, Radolf. Now run and find your grandmother before she boxes your ears for disobeying her.”

“Yes, Lord Cawer,” he said, scampering off with Durwin gripped tightly in his hand.

The warmth Calder felt at his conversation with Radolf faded rapidly as he heard the sounds of the crowd milling around outside. He took a deep breath, steeling himself for this ordeal, and walked out of the Manor.

He could see the fear on their upturned faces as they looked at him.

“My brother, Aric,” he began, “was poisoned by one of you several weeks ago. I have not yet determined who is responsible for that act but have no doubt that I will do so. And, when the culprit is found, justice will be handed to him swiftly and without mercy.”

“My brother died today,” he continued, forcing himself to keep his voice level and calm. He watched as they turned to talk amongst themselves. He saw Edgar standing at the back of the crowd and the smug look on his face fueled Calder's anger and frustration. Taking another deep breath, he fought to regain his self-control.

“Who will replace him?” A voice called out from the crowd.

“You will know that soon enough.” Devona still was not aware that the lands had been turned over to him. He certainly wasn't going to let her find out like this. “There will be no work parties tomorrow. My brother's funeral will take place in the afternoon.”

“Must we attend?” Someone else cried out.

The dam burst and Calder's face became a thundercloud of rage, causing some of the people in the front to back away into the crowd.

“He was your Lord for four years. He treated you all fairly and with respect.” Calder's voice was low and cold, but the strong timbre of anger in it carried to even those furthest away from him. “I will not order you to attend his funeral. Look to your own consciences for that.”

“Milord,” Calder heard Filbert call out to him. “will you hear our grievances today?”

Gritting his teeth, using every ounce of his willpower to keep his anger under control, he turned to Filbert.

“A good man died today. I will not disrespect his memory by pretending as if it has not happened and listen to your petty grievances. Try being men for once and work out your own problems. If you are incapable of doing that, I will hear them next week.” His gaze was piercing as he looked over the crowd.

“Listen well, though. If you waste my time, the parties involved will pay serious penalties. Have no doubt of that.”

He strode back into the Manor and startled one of the serving girls as he bellowed for her to bring him a tankard of ale.

 

 

 

CHAPTER 10

 

 

Later that evening, after a quick trip to her mother's house to explain the situation as best she could, Regan appeared once more in the Hall.

Calder gestured for her to join him at his table. The mood and conversation of all the men was somber.

“How is Devona?” Calder asked her.

“She finally cried herself to sleep a short while ago. Gideon gave me some herbs to make tea for her. I think that helped. He says that she will most likely not awaken until morning.”

“Good,” he answered. “Thank you for looking after her, Regan. I fear I do not do well with distraught women.”

Regan smiled. “With those broad shoulders of yours, Milord, I think you could do much better than you know.”

What is it about this woman, Calder wondered, that can make me feel so relaxed and at peace, just by having her by my side?

She flushed at the intensity with which he gazed at her. Turning her eyes down, she began picking at her food, moving pieces of cod around the beans in her trencher. She had no appetite for the food in front of her. Her whole being was focused on the man who sat so close beside her, his nearness overwhelming all of her senses.

“Did you make any progress today, Regan?” he asked.

“Not much, I'm afraid,” she responded nervously. “It takes much longer than I expected it would. Draco was such a great help, though. I could not have managed half as well on my own. Will he be coming with me to each cottage?”

Turning to Draco and seeing his slight nod, he answered, “Yes, he will. I'm glad you find him useful.”

This last he said with a smirk at Draco, but sensed there was more to what had happened today than she was telling him. He would get further details from Draco after she left.

Feeling self-conscious in the midst of all the large and boisterous knights, she asked Calder's permission to leave as soon as they finished eating.

She saw his frown of displeasure, but he stood and took her arm, escorting her to the door.

“I will walk with you,” he said, as they left the Manor.

“There is no need, Milord,” she said, worried that someone would see them together.

“I feel the need,” he replied, walking so close to her that their bodies brushed against one another. There was just a sliver of a moon, but the sky was blanketed by stars, lighting their way as they walked along in silence.

Calder could not resist reaching out and grabbing her hand in his own. Regan was immediately assailed by conflicting emotions at his touch; warmth and security mixed in with a strong dose of guilt and fear.

She was a married woman and, even though she felt no love for Edgar, she had promised to be faithful to him. And here she was walking through the dark, hand in hand with a handsome stranger, craving his touch, wanting his lips on hers. Wanting him to carry her again to the heights of passion they had reached that one night.

Regan's mind reeled with confusion and uncertainty. She did not want him to think she was just a common trollop, yet she did not feel comfortable explaining how empty and lost she felt. She was unable to put into words how much she longed to be wanted and needed by a man, or more precisely, by him.

Her body seemed to respond to him on its own. The guilt over her betrayal of Edgar was not quite sufficient to overpower her desire to be held in Calder's strong arms. When she was with him, she felt like a butterfly, finally released from its cocoon to fly away into the bright new day, free to be who she was and embrace the feelings he stirred within her.

“Edgar does not stay at our cottage much.” It was important that he know she was not being familiar like this with him, and then rushing home into Edgar's arms.

“Then I have given him too much credit already, for what little intelligence I thought he had,” Calder replied in a soft, satisfied voice. His blood boiled with anger every time he thought of Edgar's hands on her and was relieved to hear of their situation.

“Why is your boy so frightened of him?”

She sighed. “Edgar does not know how to be a father to him. He is not gentle with Radolf.”

She felt his grip tighten on her hand. “Does he hit the boy?”

“Oh, no, I would never allow that. It is just that, having a hand put to you is not the only way to be cowered. Edgar is most effective at using his tongue as a lash.”

“Is that how he treats you, as well?” Calder asked, his voice calm, effectively hiding the fury that coursed through his veins at the thought of such cowardice in a man.

“He used to, but we do not see him much anymore.”

“You and Radolf deserve better than that.”

“It was you who forced us to marry, Milord,” she answered quietly.

Calder stopped abruptly and looked down at her. “I was trying to do what was best