If Not For The Knight, Debbie Boek [electronic reader TXT] 📗

the spiced wine which had accompanied their meal. He saw her frown down into the empty cup and snapped his fingers. A servant instantly appeared and filled it to the brim.

Regan knew she shouldn’t be imbibing, she needed all of her wits about her when dealing with Calder. The wine though, was sweet and flavorful and did not taste strong at all, so she allowed herself a little more.

With dinner over and most of the items removed from the table, Calder had Regan’s books brought to them. For the next couple of hours, they poured over them, detail by monotonous detail.

During that time, Calder made sure her cup was never more than half empty before quietly signaling the servant to fill it again. He wanted to have a serious discussion with her when this was done and, if the wine loosened her tongue a little, so be it.

Regan was so engrossed in explaining her calculations that she never noticed how much she was drinking, nor how many times the servant inconspicuously refilled her cup.

“You have done an excellent job, Regan. I am very pleased,” Calder said sincerely, smiling down into her brilliant green eyes.

“Thank you, Milord,” she replied, flushing at his praise. “I fear the villagers will not feel the same, once they’ve seen the amounts that are back due.”

“I’m sure that you are right about that,” he agreed. “But, they only have themselves to blame. Had they paid my brother what was due him, they would not now owe so much to me.”

“Yes, Milord,” she answered softly, unable to keep from watching his wide, full lips as he spoke.

“It has been too long since I held you in my arms,” Calder said quietly, his body responding to the longing that he saw on her face. Leaning forward, so that only she could hear him, he whispered, “I need you, Regan.”

She patted her hair nervously, feeling herself blush crimson at his words. She suddenly found herself wanting him so badly that she was afraid she might do something embarrassing if she did not leave his presence soon.

“I believe it would be best if I go now, Milord,” she answered, not able to look him in the eye and see his disappointment. Regan did not want to leave, but was afraid that she would not be able to stop what might happen if she stayed.

“Will you take a walk with me first?” he asked, not willing to give up just yet.

“I shouldn’t, Calder,” she replied, making the mistake of looking into his eyes and losing herself in their depths. Every nerve in her body tingled in anticipation of his touch.

“But you will,” he said softly, his lips brushing her hair as he spoke.

He stood and took her hand, helping her to her feet and leading her to the entranceway. Making their way around the boisterous knights, who had consumed as much ale as they had food, Regan and Calder grabbed their mantles and stepped out into the cool, crisp fall night.

Still hand in hand, they walked along a trail behind the Manor. They continued deeper and deeper into the woods, where even the strong beams from the full moon had difficulty making their way through the thick evergreens.

When he felt they had gone far enough from the Manor, Calder led her to a mossy area under a large tree and sat down. He pulled Regan down firmly on his lap.

She began to protest but, even in the dim light, his lips found their way to hers. Instantly, all fight left her body and her arms encircled his neck. Her breasts flattened against his hard chest and all thoughts of protest fled from her mind.

Calder released her hair from its confinement, allowing it to envelop them as their lips met. His hands roamed freely over her body, his excitement building.

Their kisses were frenzied, their bodies trying to make up for all the time they had spent apart. Urgently they tried to touch and taste every inch of the other as, without even realizing it, layer after layer of clothing fell away. They rolled in the soft moss, their naked bodies entwined, Regan’s soft, satiny skin caressing Calder’s hard, muscular body.

Pulling his lips from hers, Calder rested on his elbow, looking down at her in admiration as the faint glow from the moon illuminated her body. The light reflected itself in her wide passionate eyes and shimmered off of her porcelain skin as he ran his fingers over the satiny expanse ever so slowly.

Her body moved in response to his touch. She turned toward him, needing to feel his body against her own, needing to feel him inside of her, bringing her the fulfillment that only he could.

He wrapped his arms around her and rolled onto his back. Carrying Regan with him, he waited breathlessly as she pushed herself up to straddle his hips, and then took him within her and rode him to heights neither could have imagined.

A short time later, regretfully, Calder rolled away from her to retrieve their mantles, which lay nearby. The night was growing cold and he had felt the goosebumps rising on her skin.

He wrapped the cloaks around them and held her tightly in their little cocoon, continuing to trail his fingers along her satiny skin. Their passion spent, he was still unable to keep his lips from lingering tenderly against hers.

Taking his finger and moving the long curls from her face, he slowly kissed her cheek, then trailed soft kisses down her jawline to her chin. “I can’t get enough of you,” he whispered against her mouth.

Regan captured his lips with her own, caressing them, teasing him with her tongue as she savored the feelings that came in the aftermath of loving him. “I shouldn’t be here,” she said softly a few moments later.

“I cannot imagine a more right place for you to be.” Calder’s voice was low, more relaxed than she had heard it in sometime, as his hand continued to explore the silky skin hiding under her mantle. “You make me complete, Regan. I don’t know how I ever made it through my days before you were in them.”

“And you confuse me so,” she replied, kissing the pulse at the base of his throat.

Calder raised himself on his elbow in order to talk with her more easily and not be so tempted by the smoothness of her skin or by her lips, slightly parted and waiting to be kissed once again.

“How do I confuse you?”

Regan remained silent, trying to find the right words. She wanted to bare her soul to him, as she had bared her body just a short time before. Maybe it was the wine, but she believed it was more than that. She believed that what they had just shared went beyond the physical, but how far beyond?

“Please, Regan, talk to me. I would do anything, anything at all for you.”

“I know you would, Calder. I know that you feel as if you need to protect Radolf and me, and I love you for it.”

“You love me?” Calder asked, his voice soft and filled with a bewildered awe. He had never considered love being a part of what they shared, had never thought to define it.

“Of course,” she answered with a warm laugh. “You did not know that?”

Caressing her face, he spoke thoughtfully. “I don’t think that I know what love truly is, so it had not occurred to me that you might love me, or that I might love you.”

“You are an odd man, Calder. But know this, whether you understand the meaning of the word or not, you do know how to express the depth of your feelings. And for that, I can say that I do love you.”

“So, if you love me, why would you consider leaving me?”

“There are so many things that you do not know, Calder,” she said, lying on her back and staring at the stars twinkling between the branches of the trees above them. Maybe there, in the heavens, she would find the answers she sought.

“Then you must tell me, Regan. For otherwise, we can never find the answers that we both need to learn.” He watched as tears escaped her eyes and slid down onto the moss beneath her head. “Is it the way that you are treated by the villagers?”

“Not really. Having your men with us has made a great difference in the way we are treated.” Her voice was soft, her brow furrowed as she struggled to come to a decision.

“Then what is it, Regan? Please trust me.”

Gracing him with an angelic smile, she suddenly realized what she must do. Finally, she was able to acknowledge that Calder was the only man who had stood up for her; the only man who protected both her and Radolf and tried to make them safe; the only man who cared when she was unhappy and tried to make things better for her. The only man that she had ever loved.

And with that knowledge, she felt an overwhelming need to believe in him and trust him to do what was right, for all three of them.

Regan sat up, pulling the mantle closer around her to ward off the chill, and touched his face. She traced her finger over his strong features, wanting her son to learn to be a man from such an honorable, noble person such as he.

“It’s about when we were together,” she began hesitantly, knowing now what she would say, but not how he would react, “before, when you first came here.”

“Yes,” he urged, his heart thundering in his chest, eager to hear her tell him the truth about his son.

“You and I,” she said, tears forming in her eyes, “we created Radolf. He is not Edgar’s son.”

Having already known the fact did not matter to him, hearing her say the words brought back the same exhilaration he felt when he first learned the truth.

Feeling the heat of his own tears burning along his cheeks, he lifted her face toward his and kissed