Pixie Dust, Amaratsu [book recommendations .txt] 📗

Prolouge: Faylinn

She believed in dreams, wishes, and pixie dust. She kept her eyes open for them, kept her heart open. She believed in a happily-ever-after ending and love at first sight. She believed in living life happily.

They thought of her as naive, as an immature child. They looked down upon her unwanted happiness. They turned their noses away from her explanations.

She didn't give up; not in the world she grew up in. She kept believing in those wishes, miracles, and pixie dust.

Always the odd one, she kept to herself. Fine blonde hair, blonde to the point of white, cascaded down her back, and her ice blue eyes scared others away. She didn't mind. She didn't like their ways of thinking and actions. She was stick thin and pale, only a slight bit muscular from her running; all the running she did didn't affect her skin but, she loved to run. It was the closest she could get to flying. Her hands were slim and obviously belonged to a girl. They were the kind that looked soft to the touch and belonged to some wealthy person, not to a girl who spent her time drawing and running.

Her face was slim and angular, her features soft. Her chest was flat, almost like a boy's, and her hips small. Her voice was quiet and, as some like to refer to it as, musical.

If you ask anyone, they'd say the girl kept to herself. The girl was always daydreaming. The girl was abnormal. She only had one other that accepted her.

The girl believed in wishes, and pixie dust. She still does.

Her name is Faylinn Lorelle.

CHAPTER 1: Dreams Unveiled

"Shit. Not good enough." I growled as I threw a bucket of water onto the pavement, erasing the images on the ground and mixing the colors together. I threw the bucket behind me, not listening to where it decided to crash.

"Not good enough. Not yet. Not yet." I muttered to myself. I picked up the bucket of chalk that layed on the ground beside the puddle and stalked off to find a dry spot to start over.

A fairy. One with beautiful wings of green and blue hues and sparkles made of light. Yes. That's what I want to see. What I want to make. What I want to be.

"Miss. That's a pretty fairy." Glancing up through the curtain of hair that fell infront of my face, I glared at a kid. He was cute, in that 'I-want-to-squeeze-you-to-death' kind of way.

"Hmm... Really?" I asked as I settled on the balls of my feet, in a crouched postion, as I watched the small kid. "What makes you say that?"

He thought for a moment as he studied me and the picture. "She looks like you." He nodded, as if making sure to himself that that's what he wanted to say.

I laughed bitterly and stood. "Whatever." I said and picked up the chalk that was scattered about.

"Aren't'cha gonna' finish it miss?" He asked. I turned to him again and shook my head. "But, it's not done! Ma says to always finish what you started." He added, looking down a bit.

I looked at him quickly before sighing. "Catch, kid." I said before throwing him a light green pice of chalk. "Finish it for me. Kay?" He caught the small piece and nodded with a smile.

---------

"Daddy, what am I?"

"A pretty fairy. A beautiful one."

"I am?"

"Yes, Faylinn. And your my fairy."

"Daddy, do I make wishes come true?"

"You do. You do."

Daddy....where are you?


CHAPTER 2: Living life just a bit

Wake up. School. Home. Eat inbetween things. That's all there is to do here. All that's left for me to do. The same old routine everyday. It gets boring after a while. It doesn't help that no one likes 'lil ol' Faylinn'. Pfft. Whatever.

I sat up in my bed, throwing the worn green blankets away from me. Too hot in here, I thought as I got up and made my way to the window. Lifting it up, I shivered a bit from the sudden cold wind that lifted my light blue cami up.

"Fay! C'mere! I need help with my homework!" My sister yelled (too loudly) from her room beside mine. "Do it your damn self!" I yelled back.

She stomped her way into my room, all four feet and five inches of her. Her brown hair bounced, weaved in small pig tailed plaits, as she made her way in and glared at me. I looked at her with amusement.

"Mama said so!" She yelled. I blinked and rubbed my ear.

"Don't yell. I'm right beside you idiot." I scoffed and went back to my bed and sat on the edge. I eyed my reflection as the little brat growled and stalked out of the room. Probably to tell Ma that I won't help her. She should start paying attention in class instead of texting on that damn phone.

Sighing, I looked around my too clean room. Everything was in place: the books over on the shelf, my art things on my desk, clothes in the dresser and closet, and my school stuff by the foot of the bed. I didn't really like it, but it was better than having to clean it up every day. And plus, I'm hardly ever in my room except to sleep or think.

Speaking of sleeping, it sounds like a wonderful idea... I closed my eyes and drifted off quickly.

---------

"Your art has to have meaning. Has to be perfect."

"But, Daddy, I can't! Its so hard!"

"You can do it Faylinn. C'mon. Take the chalk and draw."

"Alright."

"That's how you do it! Such a beautiful fairy."

"Like me Daddy?"

"Not as beautiful as you. But beautiful nevertheless."

CHAPTER 3: Ash

I hummed a tune, not a specific one really, but a tune nonetheless, as I walked down the street to the store there. It was one of my favorites because of the many books and things that they held. And they had their own section for fairies.

"All my life, I've been good," I murmured under my breath as I switched from humming to singing. "But now? Whoa~ What the hell." I chuckled at the lyrics and stopped at the door of the store. My blue eyes scanned the inside to see if anyone was in it. Only a few stranglers on the inside. I wouldn't expect much in there, since it was 'round ten at night.

As I stepped in, the bell on the door rung out in the comfortable silence. "Hello Ryu." I called out to the cashier. Ryu Takashi was in his early sixties, with grey hair and a bright grin. For an old dude, he was cool. He's like my second dad. In his own way of course.

"Konban wa Faylinn. How are you doing?" He asked as he finished ringing up a woman's purchases.

"Just fine Ryu," I replied as I walked up to the counter. He nodded and pointed towards the back. "Some new things came in. Thought you'd like to check them out."

I grinned and reached over the counter to hug the old man and scurried off towards the way he pointed. When I reached there, I found a lot of new things. Books, makeup, and games. All for fairies. Of course, the games were directed towards the younger selection.

I scanned the rack for a cetain book. When I found it, I hugged it to my chest. This book, I had been waiting for the book to come out for a long time. "Ash" by Malinda Lo. I've heard it was really good too...

"Ryu! When'd you get this book?" I asked as I skipped back over to the counter. He eyed the book, probably trying to remember when.

"I think either last week or today. I'm not entirley sure." He said as he rubbed the back of his head sheepishly.

"Save it for me? I'll be getting it tomorrow." I said as I handed it to him. Ryu nodded and put it under the counter with a smile.

"Best be getting home Faylinn. Your mother must be getting worried." He said. I sighed and nodded.

"Alright Ryu. See ya tomorrow." I called as I waved and walked out the store.

---------

"Faylinn, you'll find your prince someday."

"I don't want a prince papa."

"Then, what do you want?"

"I want a fairy papa."

"Then you'll find a fairy prince. Only the best for the best. That's what I say, right Faylinn?"

"Yes papa!"

CHAPTER 4: Reminiscing

Dear....whoever?

I loved him. Father. Papa. Asshole. Even after the many things I've heard people call him over the years, he'll always be my Papa.

I miss him. I miss his hugs. I miss that mischeivous glint that never left his eyes. I miss when he threw me in the air, letting me 'fly'. I miss his paintings and sketches. I miss his presence in the small apartment.

One thing I won't miss though is the smoke. The raw stench of alchol. The red-ness of his eyes as yelling ensured into the night, mostly directed to Ma. Never me. Never his little fairy. Just Ma.

Except that one time. And that one time was the last time I saw him.

Oh, he never used to beat me. He just lectured me for a good hot minute, then always smiled and gave me a small treat, sometimes ice-cream or candy. I perfered the candy.

He said he didn't mean to hit me. He said he wasn't thinking. He said it wouldn't ever happen again. He said this all with watery red eyes.

It didn't happen again. He left us. Ma told me he couldn't take it, and he left. But my grandma said he died that night. Taken by a bullet as he ran for his life. He ran as if he was flying. That's what grandma says. I think I believe her more than I believe my own mother. Why? Cause he said he'd never leave me. He'd never run away. And if he did, he'd take me with him.

I don't hate my Ma. I don't really like her either. It's more of a neutral feeling. I'm thankful for her taking care of me, feeding me, clothing me, giving me a roof to sleep under, but that's as far as I'll go. Other than that, she doesn't speak to me except to lecture me or tell me to clean up my mess. Yet, I thank her.

Hell. Why am I writing this? This 'diary'. Only a homework grade to me. So why do I write down my past, my feelings, in such a readable place for anyone to see?

Oh well. What's done is done. I don't care anyway. These pages are too pretty to rip out. And I'm too lazy to rewrite this.

Damn.


CHAPTER 5: Void

"Robert! Stop putting these silly fantasies in my daughter's head! Look at her. Ten and still believes in those damned creatures because of you! You!"