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ripped from my hands and torn into shreds by my mother. She had been so angry that I had opened that letter. More so when I told her it was addressed to me. I tried to ask her about my grand-father but she refused to say a word. So all I knew was that I had a Canadian grand-father yet I longed to know more about him. I couldn't ask my father because, on the rare occasion that I did see him, he was never alone. My mother never seemed to allow us to be together, just the two of us.
All I knew about my grand-father was that he was Canadian. I didn't know what to feel. There was a sadness there. A numbness too. I missed my parents so much that I had a deep ache in my stomach. Yet during those weeks, I didn't miss the life that we'd had at all. But that didn't detract from the fact that they were my parents and I needed to know where they were. Even though I had December, Dorothy and June – and their beautiful cat Iris – I still felt lonely, as if a huge piece of me was missing.
As I boarded the plane to Canada, I knew I had been completely left in the dark and that my life was about to change, possibly forever. I wished to know what I was going to... and to whom. If my parents had filled me in on their backgrounds, their childhoods, perhaps I would know where I was heading. My only knowledge was that I was boarding a flight to Vancouver and that someone was collecting me. On the brief telephone call with my grand-father Gabriel, he had told me that he was unable to come and collect me but that a 'very close family friend' would be picking me up. That friend was called Ben. I didn't even know to where I was going after Vancouver.
The airport was hugely confusing to me. Dorothy and June had wanted to come with me but I confidently told them that I'd be okay. That I'd manage. They were old ladies, they didn't need the hassle. Eventually, they agreed to let me go alone and had arranged it with the airline, and as we said our goodbyes, I thanked them for everything. I promised I would stay in touch and let them know how everything was going. They cried as I waved to them from the back of the taxi cab and secretly, so did I. I waited until they could no longer see me and then the tears that I had managed to keep at bay for so long, began to stream down my face. I don't know how I'd managed to keep from crying for so many weeks, but I felt as though the tears had been building up as I sobbed and sobbed in the back of that car, as I drove away from the only life I'd ever known.
I cried not only for my missing parents and for leaving my home behind, but because I would desperately miss those two ladies who had become like family to me. I would miss them, and I would miss December.
I didn't know how I would live without her, but she had promised to keep in touch. “Lilly Taylor, you're my best friend in the whole world. I can't imagine life without you but we'll manage... for now. It won't be too long until we're together again. We'll see each other soon,” she'd said the day before as we'd hugged goodbye. It had sounded so rehearsed but I figured it needed to be, otherwise we would have just been in floods of tears. She was the brightest star in my life and I couldn't imagine being without her.
The airport was bigger and brighter than I imagined it to be. It seemed to go on for miles but after reading my ticket, and with a little help from the taxi driver, we figured out where I was supposed to go. I felt like a very tiny fish in a very big sea, but as soon as I had checked in and asked a few questions, I was told that the airline staff would make sure I was in the right place at the right time.
The next few hours were spent watching people coming and going before I finally climbed aboard the plane that would take me to my new home. Excitement, as well as panic, flowed through me.
Soon after take-off, darkness clung to me and I felt cold. I shivered.
As I sat there alone, cold and dazed, a friendly flight attendant approached me with a warm blanket and a pillow.
“I couldn't help noticing you shivering,” she said warmly as she handed them to me.
I took them gratefully and wrapped myself up tightly.
“Would you like some hot tea or hot chocolate?” she asked. I opted for some hot chocolate and she smiled and turned away.
I was pleased the flight was quiet. I had the back row to myself so I put up all the armrests and stretched my legs out as I watched her walk towards me bearing the hot drink a few minutes later.
She looked a little like me. At least like me when my hair had been its natural colour. Jet black hair, bright eyes that were wide apart, pale skin and of delicate build. Her face was pretty and friendly and I was glad of the attention. It was as if she was taking extra special care of me.
The hours soon passed by and it seemed like no time at all when the pilot announced to the crew that they should prepare the cabin for landing. I must have looked frightened as the kind attendant came over to reassure me.
“Don't worry. You're almost home now,” she whispered.
I smiled and nodded. Perhaps she was just being kind. Although I couldn't shake the feeling that she knew of my fate.
So I had landed in Canada. I guessed this was my home now. But for how long? When my parents returned, would I go back to London? What if they were never found? What then?
At least for now, Canada was my home.
As I stepped off that plane, I felt helpless. I felt as if I had no control over my life. Perhaps I no longer did.

CHAPTER FIVE

I didn't have to wait. The moment I stepped out into the arrivals hall with my luggage, I heard someone calling out my name. My eyes searched the crowd until they stopped on a young man who waved avidly at me. I tried to smile but probably failed.
“Lillian? Is that you? I wasn't sure if I'd recognise you from the photo... you look very different! It's the hair, I guess. Although you're a lot younger in the photo. Anyway, Gabriel - I mean your grand-father - couldn't make it as you know and so he asked me to pick you up. I'm Benjamin. It's great to finally meet you,” he gushed.
“Hi,” was all I could muster as he delved into his pocket and pulled out a photo of what looked a little (and I mean a little) like me from when I was just a baby. He turned the image to show me and I laughed at the sheer ridiculousness of it.
“Er... I'd like to think I've changed, a lot. I'm amazed you recognised me at all,” I said, starting to feel comfortable with the stranger, but wondering where the photo had come from. It wasn't one I was familiar with. That said, no photo would be one I was familiar with. We didn't have any family photos at all.
Together we laughed as Benjamin easily lifted my bag from the luggage trolley and asked me to follow him. I stumbled behind him, not sure what to say as we walked through the car park until we stopped in front of a large dark green, slightly rusty pick-up truck.
Luckily Benjamin was the chatty type so I needn't have worried. All I had to do was listen and give the occasional reply.
“I hope you don't get travel sickness as we've quite a long drive ahead of us,” he said as we climbed into the pick-up and he started the engine.
“I don't think so... I was okay in the taxi and on the plane so I guess not.”
“You mean that's the only time you've ever travelled anywhere?” he asked, surprised, as I nodded in response.
“Well then, sit back and enjoy the trip. I'm sure you'll be impressed with what you see. Canada, especially this part of the country, is pretty awesome. There's lots to see.”
I made myself as comfortable as possible as he made small talk as we drove out of the airport towards our destination. I listened while I looked out the window at the dramatic ocean views, enjoying the moment until he broached the subject I had been dreading: my parents.
“So, Lillian...” it was coming.
“Please Benjamin... call me Lilly. Nobody has called me Lillian since, since, well probably since that photo was taken.”
He laughed and nodded, “Okay, Lilly, but only if you call me Ben.”
We smiled and were both silent for a moment but I knew he was going to try and ask me again.
“Lilly. I just wanted to say how sorry I am about your parents going missing. I can't imagine what you must be going through. It must be absolutely awful...”
I didn't really know how to respond. So I chose not to.
“It's okay. I get it. If you don't want to talk about it, that is. You barely know me after all,” he said with a sad smile as he pulled onto a busy motorway.
Feeling a little guilty, I nodded, “Why don't you tell me about you then?”
“Not a heck of a lot to say, really,” he took a breath before continuing, “my name you now know. I'm twenty-seven years old. I've lived in the same town pretty much all my life. I've recently opened a vet practice on the outskirts of town. Yes, I'm the local vet, in case you were wondering why the truck is covered in dog hair. What else would you like to know?”
“Brothers, sisters?” I queried.
“Oh, yeah. I have a younger brother, Oliver, who'll be seventeen,” Ben looked at his watch, “in about thirty-six hours,” he laughed. “I think your grand-father is hoping you'll join the party, the day after tomorrow. Nothing grand. Just family and a few friends. I guess he's hoping you'll make some friends of your own.”
I cringed slightly and Ben noticed. “Sorry, too soon, I guess. You know, everyone will completely understand if you'd rather not join in. You need some time to settle in and chill out and... er... never mind.”
I nodded. I didn't think Ben had the slightest clue how grateful I was. At the same time, I wondered who he meant by 'everyone' but I didn't ask. I thought about what he said about making some new friends and I sighed quietly, remembering my sheltered life in England with so few friends. What if people didn't like me? Having never made any other friends it was hard for me to imagine meeting people and being all... well... friendly. But then this life was going to be completely different from my old life. Perhaps I'd fit in perfectly. Perhaps I could change. I struggled with the thought.
It was just after midday and the sky started to cloud over. I hadn't noticed how cold it was. I shivered.
Ben immediately whacked up the heat without saying a word.
We drove in silence for quite a while until I noticed we were approaching a ferry terminal.
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