The Experiment, Cassidy Shay [amazing books to read .TXT] 📗
- Author: Cassidy Shay
Book online «The Experiment, Cassidy Shay [amazing books to read .TXT] 📗». Author Cassidy Shay
As we’re leaving, Dr. Pender grabs my arm. “Meagan, can I talk to you for a minute? Everything is off the record. I promise that nothing that you say will go into any reports or anything like that.” She looks around the hallway, and then meets my eyes again. “Since you’ve been on Floor 6, have you been hallucinating at all? I’ve seen you sometimes mumbling to the wall, and I’ve heard you talking pretty loud to someone in your room. I’m just curious about it.”
I think about how I should answer. I don’t trust the Academy. I’m not sure why, but I wouldn’t want them to know about the hallucinations. But I do trust Dr. Pender. I know that she will keep her word and my answer will stay strictly between us.
I nod. “Yes, I have. Only with Carl, Jack, and Collin. I see the Carl the least, but I can’t complain. When I do see him, it scares me. But I see Collin the most. And that really helps me get through the day.”
She nods, then looks off into the distance, deep in thought. “Okay. That’s all I wanted to know. Thanks for being honest with me, Meagan.” I walk to my old room, but I’m the only one there.
As usual, being alone makes me think of Collin. “Collin,” I whisper. “I miss you.” I close my eyes, and he’s there by the bed.
“I miss you too.” He reaches for my hand, and I’m relieved when he’s able to grab it. Every once in a while, I’m able to physically feel Collin and Jack when they touch me. Other times, though, they go right through me.
I have a short conversation with Collin about the baby, but he vanishes when the door swings open.
“Hey,” says Mathew. “Sorry that I disappeared like that. I had some friends that wanted to see our new room, and then we were just talking about the baby for a while.” I nod, but don’t say anything.
“I feel so bad for doing this to you,” I admit. He asks me what I’m talking about. “You have to lie to all of your friends about this whole thing. And then you’re going to be raising a child that isn’t even yours. And you also have to lie to the Academy. If they find out, they could kill both of us. I shouldn’t have done that to you.” I didn’t know that I was crying, but I feel a tear slide down the bridge of my nose. I feel my nose start to run, and I sniffle so that I don’t get snot all over my face.
Mathew instantly moves into protection mode. He comes over to the bed and pulls me to him. His arms are around my shoulders and his chin is resting on my head. It’s one of the most comfortable positions that I’ve ever been in.
“You have no reason to be sorry for that. You can’t hold all the weight on your shoulders. You have to let me help you with that. Lying to my friends about this isn’t a big deal. Sometimes, I even forget that Belle isn’t mine. He takes a breath and starts rubbing his hands gently over my back.
“I have no problem helping you raise this child. I didn’t know Collin very well, but I liked him. He was a good guy, and he always helped me when he got the chance. And over the months, I’ve gotten pretty attached to you, Meagan. You’ve helped me many times, and you probably didn’t even know that I needed the help. I owe it to both of you to help you with Belle.”
I not, but I still feel guilt. I hate having to lie to Sarah about Belle, and I wouldn’t have ever dreamed of lying to Macy and Jack, or even Carl, before he turned psycho. And if I had to raise someone else’s kid? I shudder. I don’t even want to think about what kind of parent I’ll be to my own child.
I stay wrapped up in Mathew’s arms for a long time. It’s silent in the room, and I think about the time when I saw Carl and Jack fighting in the hallucination.
I know that I was seeing something that really happened, instead of just another crazy hallucination. I know because they always talk to me, and rarely with each other. But how did happen? More importantly, why did it happen? I think for a long time, running different ideas through my head.
“That’s it,” I mumble to myself. Several Azuli are able to see into the future. A couple years ago, I talked to a whole group of them. They informed me that their abilities to see into the future were also selective, with a certain subject or topic showing up in each vision. “That’s got to be it.”
But why hasn’t it happened again? I don’t remember either of the Azuli that I talked to mention anything about how often their visions came to them.
“What’s it?” Mathew asks me. I explain everything, and he nods slowly. “Wow. I don’t know about Floor One, but where I’m from, the Azuli that could see forward were the most respected out of all of us. So if you can see ahead, and be immune to the chemical when no one else was, then you must be a pretty big deal.” He laughs a little, but I’m still deep in thought. What will I see next?
The answer to my question comes a couple weeks later. One week until my daughter will be born. I’m eating lunch in the cafeteria and suddenly I see Collin sitting at the table next to me. Beside him, a girl is laughing.
She has blonde hair, but there’s brown on the bottom layer. Her eyebrows are dark and unnaturally, but not unattractively, shaped. She has a tall forehead, small ears, and a perfect smile. Her nose is wide, and her eyes have the perfect shape. She’s beautiful, and I hate her.
She’s still laughing, and she places a hand on Collin’s bicep. “You’re so funny, Collin,” she says. He tenses at her touch, and pulls away. Her smile falters, but she hides her disappointment well. Her hazel eyes, which tell me she’s not an Azulate, are the only betrayal of her feelings.
I watch for a couple minutes, but their conversation is very one-sided. Collin isn’t saying much in answer to her comments.
Finally, I hear, “What’s wrong? You’re never this quiet,” from the girl.
“Just be quiet, will you? I’m missing her a lot today. If I’ve been keeping track of time correctly, I’ve been gone for forty weeks. My baby’s going to be born in a couple days. And I’m going to miss it.” He glares at the mashed potatoes on his plate.
She wraps an arm around his shoulder and pulls him into a half hug. My face flushes with anger. Get off my man,
I think. She whispers something into his ear that I can’t hear. She’s very flirtatious, and it makes me hate her even more.
I’m about to march over to them and rip every hair out of her head when he pushes her away.
“Kate, I told you to stop! Just…” He stands up, frustrated and angry. “Just leave me alone. I can’t deal with you right now.” He storms away, leaving her alone. As she disappears, I look back at my plate.
I know now that he still thinks about me, and that he still loves me. And I know that a week from now, he will feel the same.
He didn’t look very happy, though. Oh, Collin,
I think to myself. Please allow yourself to be happy. Be with that girl, and be happy. Have fun, have beautiful children. Just be happy.
I leave the cafeteria. When I get back to my room, I realize that I didn’t even throw my tray away. I sit on the bed with a sigh, and then look around the room.
Mathew and I have moved into the new one. I was allowed to frame the pictures from my wedding, and those are hanging on the wall by the door. The fridge has a calendar on it, as well as a white board that Mathew and I use to communicate when our schedules don’t allow us to talk in person.
Sometime this week, one of the cooks is going to come in and show me how to cook certain things. I was told the other day that, for the most part, I won’t need it much until the baby has teeth. I’ll need it for me, though, since my sleeping and eating schedule will be different, the cafeteria won’t always be open when I need it.
I only get a few minutes to think about all of this, and then Dr. Pender knocks on the door. “Time to go see Julie,” she says. I stand up and waddle to the second floor. When I get to the room where we meet, she isn’t there.
I sit down and wait, but she still doesn’t show up. I wait even longer, but the door remains closed. Finally, Dr. Pender comes in. She moves slowly, and places a hand on my shoulder.
“You won’t be able to see Julie today,” she says. “She went through labor early and gave birth. Because it’s a month too early, her son is in intensive care right now. Let’s go back, and you can see them in a couple days.”
I follow Dr. Pender back to Floor Six and I waddle to my room. I sit on my bed to think. What does the baby look like? Will he get along with Belle?
Questions like this are still running through my head when Mathew comes to get me for dinner.
“You look like you’re concentrating really hard on something,” he says. I give a short nod in reply. After a few seconds, he asks, “Well, do you want to talk about it?”
“Julie had her baby today. It’s a month too early, though, so he’s in intensive care right now. I’m just thinking about how that will change things.” He nods, and then takes my hand.
“It’ll all work out. I promise,” he tells me. He doesn’t drop my hand, but instead gives it a reassuring squeeze.
I’ve been married to Mathew for nine months, but this is the first time that we’ve held hands. His hand is warm, but not sweaty. My fingers intertwine perfectly with his. It’s the most comfortable thing I’ve done since that night with Collin.
Collin.
I stop walking, and
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