Bridge of Time by Missy (Volume 3), Presented by SAGE [rom com books to read .TXT] 📗

“while they are still in a relationship” Others may find the negative emotions too much to bear they ran off to the first thing they thought would make them feel better one thing lead to another only to find themselves playing a Wicked Game, creating more pain and confusion, creating more chaos in their existing relationships. One may claim “Oh well, he or she did it to me first!” or “I was so upset at him or her, I wasn’t thinking clear” Wicked Games grown ups play only brings more emotional turmoil in the end. Granted that someone has done something wrong to the other, granted that someone is so upset or so hurt, granted that someone was done wrong by the other, getting back at that person really wouldn’t do any good at all. In the holding a grudge or resentment towards someone and getting a pay back by doing something wrong to that person only brings more chaos in any relationship. It’s hard enough to handle a relationship between TWO people let alone bringing in a THIRD person in the picture just because one thinks subjecting themselves into Wicked Games would teach the other person a lesson.


When grown ups play Wicked Games with each other in the midst of a relationship turning sour, it builds a wall of Jealousy, of Mistrust, of Doubt. It is a sure way of losing what ever is left of any relationship. Please remember no relationship is perfect. No relationship is all “fine and dandy” it takes a lot of work TOGETHER to build a long lasting relationship and bringing in an extra person, no mater what the reasons are will only destroy what ever is left of any relationships. [Of course it’s different if you and your partner are OKAY with the notion of multiple partners because you both no longer have control of your own relationship or you are done with each other. FOR GOOD]


I KNOW I SHOULDN'T (By Missy)


I lay awake at night wishing you are near. When I close my eyes I see your face. I find myself holding on to that very moment it’s the only time I can have you with me. Silly I know and I shouldn’t. But I am so drawn to you in ways you could not imagine. I think of how you are and I wonder if you think of me too, which I doubt that you do. Lately I find myself battling on whether to tell you how I feel or just keep this feeling deep inside of me, buried in my thoughts as if it is a playground of the love that never was. I know I shouldn’t, I know it makes it harder for me but days when I don’t think of you makes my existence feels meaningless yes it’s as crazy as it sounds and I know, I shouldn’t but I do.

I don’t know how long will I be able to keep it in, I don’t know what would I say to you when I muster the courage to speak of this unthinkable, unimaginable emotions of affection I have for you and I many times I thought of what you would say? Of what you would think? These thoughts weakens me everyday, my mind plays trick on me, it tells me no, it tells me don’t speak, it tells me not to make the biggest mistake of my life. There’s this little voice inside my head telling me not to embarrass and humiliate myself. I know I shouldn’t… But my heart is aching, it leaves a sharp pain, the emotions I have for you is too strong, it’s unbearable at times. It’s aching to scream, it’s aching to be known. I know I shouldn’t… but I do.. And I don’t know how much longer will I be able to keep it in.


I know I shouldn’t…

I know it’s madness, I know it’s insane and as silly as it may sound I have fallen so madly in love with you yet I don’t have the courage to speak my mind, I don’t have the strength to say a word and it hurts me a great deal to keep my emotions in, it drives me madly insane but I know I have to keep in silence afraid that you may mock my feelings, afraid that you would just laugh it up, but I guess what it really is.. Is the fear of being rejected. The fear of being told I am not the one for you. I don’t know how you feel, I don’t know what I am to you, I don’t know who I am in your life or if you ever slightly thought of the possibilities, that maybe.. Just maybe I may actually feel something for you? Or that you feel something for me too? Ah these things.. I know I shouldn’t even be thinking of, but I do ….


One may say, you can never miss what you never had. But you and I, moments we’ve shared, no matter how briefly it may have been means something to me. No matter how little or short the time we spent together, the moments we’ve shared together, they meant something to me, they created memories I found myself cherishing and I know, I shouldn’t … But those moments with you are the very reason why you hold a soft place in my heart. I know I shouldn’t… But here I am wondering will you ever have a clue? Will you ever know how much you meant to me? I know I shouldn’t.. But I don’t know how much more I can bear to keep this love I am feeling for you.


JUST WHEN I THOUGHT (By Missy)


A song reminded me of you tonight. It's been a while since I thought of you. I tried my best to put forth the effort to not think of you lately, but tonight I guess I failed. I found myself remembering you again. Funny how little things can be a reminder of something so significantly profound. A simple song playing on a radio can bring back so much memories of you. I know I don’t come across your mind but tonight I miss hearing your voice again, I miss the way we used to talk, I miss the way we used to laugh, the feeling of nearness you used to make me feel, the comfort I used to get when I knew you were just there... You were just there for me. You're gone and I don't think you'll ever come back again and just when I thought I was getting over you.. Something reminded me of you bringing you back into my life and the funniest thing of it all is the reality, that you'll never know how you made me feel tonight.


This feeling of longing for you. The feeling the emptiness, the regrets of no longer being a part of your life. You just vanished as if you never existed, you never explained why, I never asked. Just when I thought we were getting somewhere, just when I thought you were opening up to me, just when I thought you were starting to feel something, just when I thought you knew how I was feeling, you vanished as if I had never existed, you disappeared leaving no tracks, leaving no sign and leaving a hole in my heart. You're always mysterious that way. I used to think this was the game you play, I used to think you'll always bounce back to me knowing I am always here, within your reach, waiting, anticipating. Lately I think you just decided to keep away, to stay away without even saying why? Leaving me with so many questions unanswered endlessly without ever knowing if I will ever know why you did what you did. I tried to move on, I tried to forget you ever existed, I tried to forget you were once a part of me, I tried to distract myself, divert my thoughts, I tried to just let you go, thinking maybe, just maybe.. You’ll soon still remember me. But I was wrong. It has been too long, I waited too long..


And just when I thought I was getting closer to forgetting, to moving on.. to admitting you will never be mine..... There you are again, flashing through my head... I just wish I could still talk to you, at least for the last time... Because I'd really like to know if you could tell me how will I ever forget you? It's always when I thought I was getting close... It's when your memories bring you closer to me. Some stupid silly song tonight just brought your memories back to me and here I am once again..... Longing for you.


WHEN THE HEART FALLS (By Missy)


When my heart falls for that someone I have my rules and plans on top of my head, there are certain thngs and ways you have to be to win my heart, your looks must be a certain way pleasing to my eyes, my friends should lke you, well at least to my closest friend that is, to the rest I may be able to explain why I pick you instead of someone else. Before I give my heart to you, there are certain criterias you have to fit in, my social life, my work, my families and things I do daily which I'd like you to be interested in or be a part of it, your friends should like so we can get along, if not at least your parents do. Things you do, social life you're interested in, even your hobby should be at least close to ine, if not into my liking. Before I open my heart to you, there are ways and things you have to meet, personalities I'd like you to have, characteristics I'd like to you to have, maybe my standard is a little bit too high or my expectations are a tad bit hard to meet. But my heart.. My rules.. Oh I wish it's all that simple eh? Truth is through... When my heart fall ... I might forget all my rules. Your smile will drive me mad, your voice will make my knees weak, your eyes will melt my heart, your touch will drive me madly insane and there off I go... My heart just fell! and if someday my heart finds out it was a momentary falling in love, It's all okay, I can tell myself "Hey! at least I fell in love!" I knew how it felt like, I felt alive! in my tears while my heart is broken, I may look back and think of all the rules I set for myself... I may cry nights after nights blaming myself for not following through my own Love-Rules, in time, when I get back on my feet again.. I might find myself setting the rules higher, setting my standard higher.. And of course... When someone new sweeps my feet away.. When my Heart Falls.. I'll forget all the rules (again) I might find myself in the same situation over and over again.. and will set me rules over and over again... And of course! Forget those rules again as soon as My heart falls. (again) And that's okay! because I know someday... True Love will come along... And all my rules, all my standard will not be a hard task to meet because when True Love comes along... That someone will have the same criteria, the same rules as my heart does and that'll be the day my Heart will finally Fall.... Fall for someone who would teach me