The gospel of Itchy Wiggle Christ, Gregory-John McCormick, Ralf Dellhofen [black books to read .TXT] 📗

for the benefit-cd. i sat on my ass, together with roland bies of the band »blood for eve«, darrin huss and per-anders kurenbach (psyche), endless thirteen hours in a german discothek to sell gregory´s paintings, in a kind of exhibition. myk jung of »the fair sex« and tina of »endless records« were there too. per-anders kurenbach gave a lot of money for the attorney, he lent from a friend. nils sinatsch of "eternal nightmare/neon insect" collected whole lists of signatures for the petition at his concerts. the guys of medienkonverter (german e-zine) wrote a great review for the cd, and the infrarot webshop helped to sell the cd. there were a lot of people in online communities and forum which donated their last cents to help as much as they can. i am ashamed, because i cannot list all of the people which done anything, or at least tried to help a bit. i even received a donation from a seriously ill lady from beavercreek, oregon, mrs. barbara dougan, and sherry swiney of p.a.t.r.i.c.k. crusade in alabama. i was willing to help more and more organizations who worked and still work in the prisoner and human rights section. i signed their petitions and helped them with letters for prisoners, and they helped me.

 

at the same time i received more "tons to do" lists from gregory, who was seriously ill in prison. he suffered from constant migraine headaches, he puked and shitted blood, and lost a lot of weight. it was a real horror sometimes and more work, i´ve had done in my whole life. more work, as i was able to handle sometimes. a small german music magazine wrote, that amnesty international helped to free gregory from prison. that is absolutely bullshit! amnesty never done anything to help us. i first contacted their US headquarter and they told me, they wouldn´t help a "common criminal"! then i contaced their german headquarter, which told me, they couldn´t do anything and i should better contact amnesty usa! then i contacted amnesty ireland and tried to tell them, what gregory has done for ireland in the past. they had, at least, balls enough to wish me "good luck with the brother in a foreign land"! gregory has spent a lot of time in ireland.

 

my numerous contacts with prisoner rights organizations led me to the point, where i found doug tjapkes from michigan. he was a former broadcast journalist and a real smart gentlemen. he was kind, friendly and calm. and the right person i needed at that time to stay sane and calm too. he was running his own little prisoner rights organization, Humanity for Prisoners, the former Innocent!, in michigan and helped his afro-american friend, maurice carter, who was incarcerated in a prison, for a crime he did not commit, far to long. doug and i helped each other over the following years. often doug wasn´t even able to pay his own bills for the next office rent or the stuff he needed for his office. two of the attorneys i have paid with our money, wasn´t able to free gregory. i donated the last bit of money i had to doug tjapkes, so he was able to start working to free gregory more intensive. doug sometimes needed gasoline for his old studebaker, so he could drive to the prison and speak for gregory at his annual parole board hearings. on the second hearing, two years after he started to help, doug tjapkes was successful at the parole board and was able to finally free gregory from the prison hell-hole.

 

gregory already suffered a lot in prison. he was mentally and physically wrecked. he constantly suffered from migraine headaches and a never ending cold. very often i thought, these are the symptoms people get, when they develope cancer. he couldn´t stop his depressions and thoughts of suicide anymore. he lost blood every time, when he was vomitting and shitting. 8 years in prison were far to much for him. you can´t lock a tiger in a cage such a long time, and even half a year is to much for a free living / free thinking soul like gregory. i already knew, that no doctor or medicine in this world would help to wipe out the inflicted damage. just a few hours after he was released from prison, it was in april 2008, gregory gave me a call and we talked and laughed a lot. and we phoned a lot of times then. sometimes for hours or the whole night. i remember, i received a telephone bill from my provider, and wasn´t able to pay it. all the years, it was a hard work for me, to keep gregory away from committing suicide and to beg him to stay strong, until he would be back in good old germany, where he lived a lot of years. sometimes i wrote/talked more softly with him, other times i needed to be more harsh, to make an appeal to his proudness. it was an impossed restriction by the michigan parole board, that gregory shouldn´t leave the country for the next two years, after he was released. sanctioned by his probation officer. gregory´s dad couldn´t give him a room in his house, because his new wife hatred gregory and wasn´t willing to let him even stay in the house for only one day.

 

gregory was more or less without a home. he could sleep here and there, but only for a couple of days. i suggested to him, to sleep in a halfway house, until i would find anything for him, but he won´t. i contacted a lot of people in need to help him, finding a place to sleep. then gregory begged me to come to michigan. at that time i was mentally ill, too. the whole situation over the 7 1/2 years, was to much for me. my local job office covered me with a lot of shitty jobs and so i decided to make a deal with a bank, to get the money for a master in house painting. i was more than broke after i signed for the master school. how could i afford the money to visit gregory in michigan, without having any money? i wasn´t even able to buy me a ticket to fly to frankfurt, germany! so i asked keith jackson, co-founder of shock therapy. his brother was working for an airline. maybe he was able to help me with a flight ticket? but keith couldn´t do anything! after that, gregory and i asked glenn mc cormick, gregory´s dad, for help, to lend me, at least, the money for a ticket. but as always, glenn did nothing! i don´t know, if glenn was out of money himself? was he just afraid to help? maybe he thought, i would get in deep trouble, when i fly to michigan and could get incarcerated too? i have had some letters with the (former) governor of michigan, jennifer granholm!

 

like so many times before, i was completely alone with my help for gregory. no one was willing to help in any way. so i thought it is best to take away the money i have gotten from my bank to pay the master school and buy a ticket to michigan, instead of visiting my course. i was close to quit my master school, when suddenly i received the message, that gregory has died. the police found him, frozen to death and drunken, in a field not far away from his dad´s house. that was on the 5th of november in 2008. remember, remember, the 5th of november! i will never forget that day! i don´t know, if he committed suicide, but i think so. he was simply tired of doing another two years, before he would be able to leave the usa for germany. gregory´s half-sister, beth, informed me, that they found gregory with a smile in his face. right, as he predicted it in his now following book "the gospel of itchy wiggle christ".

 

i became mentally very ill. the death of my friend was unbelieveable for me. i couldn´t understand it for many month. i left the fulltime master school course and switched over into a weekend course, to be able to finish it, many month later. gregory´s widow, sabina, and i talked by the phone right after gregory was dead. she was weeping for hours and i wasn´t able to talk much with her. i was speechless. so i sat there on my phone, and listened to her. what more could i do? i wasn´t able to talk, to think, or to feel anything other but disappointment. my mother was weeping, after ingrid knetsch informed her about gregory´s passing. i couldn´t speak with my own mother about that. the work of 7 1/2 years for what? for nothing?

 

gregory´s last will and testament was, that a part of his ashes will buried at the blue stack mountains in donegal, ireland. so i asked glenn mc cormick again, the guy that i started to hate, because he had done nothing to help his son. only glenn and gregory´s widow were authorized by law to care for the tranport of his ashes to ireland. but, glenn simply ignored us! each death row inmate would get his right for a last wish, and even the last wish of his own son, was to much for gregory´s dad. gregory was far away from being a death row inmate! his ashes "rests" now in a hole at a michigan cemetery, the place, gregory started to hate so much, during his far to long incarceration.

 

gregory (sean) mc cormick was born on the 30th of may in 1964 in michigan, and he died on the 5th of november 2008 in michigan. he was only 44 years old. one and a half year after gregory was buried, i finished my painter school and opened up a very small company, like a sole trader business. i needed two new bank accounts, for private and business. the bank sent me computer generated PIN´s for the account. one of the PIN´s contained gregory´s birthday, the other one his date of death. coincidence? we still have a spiritual connection!

 

in august 2010 i was forced to get my first cardiac pacemaker. i lost my house painter company. i am more than poor today. but this is germany! the land, where angela m. is serving the drinks for her friends at the bar of the hotel bilderberg! we have even homeless craftsman, attorneys and former businessmen sleeping under the bridge! my heart is weak and i don´t know, if i will make it thru the next four or five years. i am mentally and physically ill. like gregory was, when he died. i try to leave germany in the next two or three years. i will definately end my life in ireland. i don´t know, how to "manage" it, but i surely will. i´m not able to transport gregory´s ashes to the blue stack mountains myself, but i will carry a part of his soul to the place, he loved so well, enclosed in my own body!

 

i have never betrayed gregory nor he had done this to me. he was far away from being an altar boy or a saint. for the committing of his arson, he sometimes walked thru hard times with me. and i judged him several times for the shit he has done in his life, in my letters to him.

 

i might not have the right to judge a friend or to tell him, what he shall do. but i have the duty to tell him, when i see anything, i think, he had done wrong in his life, he should better think of next time. you can find new "friends" on each corner of the streets and celebrate a party with as much people as you like. but which of your friends will stay on your side, once the party is over? gregory´s incarceration was