What's hidden within me, Ameera Butt [best free ebook reader .txt] 📗
- Author: Ameera Butt
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what I'm going to do with you.” Aiste yelled in happiness.
“Be happy as much as you want girl, at the end of the day we both are going to die.” I calmly said with a smile across my face.
“What do you mean both of us?” She asked enquiringly.
“Well if we think about it, I’m the driver here and you are the passenger. I’m in charge of the locks in this car and having a car safety thing going on in my mind the cars been put on child lock so there's no chance of you randomly jumping out of here, girl.”
“What on earth are you on about! Stop the car right now before I shoot you!” She ordered being a little scared.
I laughed out knowing how I would fully scare her. “One gun and five bullets Aiste. You wasted one on a vase two on Max and two on my sister Kat. With what built are you exactly going to kill me with?”
She looked at me in such terror, how did I figured all this out all a sudden? I could see her face filling up with sweat, as her throat was becoming drier and her life... Her life was becoming shorter.
“You killed my sister Aiste not some random innocent person. You’re going to pay for it. Not with money, with your life!” I broke out to her as she sat there frozen and confused.
“You realise we die together?” She tried to scare me.
“I’ve never been scared of death. I’ve only been scared of love and that fear... That fear I’ve overcome.” As we reach near the edge of a cliff I increased the speed of the car realising that the guys were behind me increasing their speed too. Getting right near the cliff end I drift the car side ways and jump out of the car rolling down the rough dusty ground as the car fall of from the edge of the cliff with Aiste being in there. Even though I said to her that she wouldn’t be able to escape from the car because I had it on child lock she forgot that the drivers door isn't on the same lock setting.
In a sudden the guys reached where I was and since their speed was so fast they couldn’t slow it down easily. The car stopped right at the end of the cliff half hanging off and the first person to break through the back car window hanging off was Logan followed by Sherry. They tried to pull themselves up as Lionel rushed to the back of the car and gave his hands out to both of them. The balance of the car was too much on their side, as the car couldn't keep self-balance. I rushed to side to see what was going on more clearly. I saw the three of them and couldn't find Mass. I was too worried about the three hanging guys to save their lives than Mass.
Lionel's hand slip from Logan and Sherry as they both loose their control and fall down the deep cliff fading away the lower they went. The fear of losing them hit me hard as I closed my eyes so tight and thought of Lionel. I ran towards the car and tried to get around to grab onto Lionel. I lost Sherry and Logan but I didn’t want to lose Lionel too. First time I loved someone, I couldn’t lose him. I had lost everyone I loved; I just simply couldn’t lose Lionel. I finally got a good grip of his hand as the car started moving about. I held him so tightly by the hand, it felt like I would never let go of him no matter what! The car fell of the cliff edge as Lionel was dangling of the cliff holding half onto my hand and half onto a rock that was against him. I looked intensely at him. After meeting him I found love, after knowing him I moved from my one and only fear. But after knowing him I lost a best friend and a sister. I don’t know where Mass is now, dead or alive? Lionel knew what was going on but never mentioned anything to me before everything got worse. I looked at him and saw the goods and bad. I was in confusion in what I wanted to do.
Blood spread everywhere on the floor. It didn’t miss a spot it was even on the door. It was pain that it showed. It was like every bit of me had exploded. It wasn’t war or love, neither was it pure as a dove. An unexpected rush, every part of me crushed. Simply felt like burning hell. Not soon after the horrifying sound of the bell. Breathing is becoming unfeasible. I was trapped not being releasable. Now I’m here unaware. The tension around I can not bare. Help me from where I am trapped. A bit of me is totally snapped. Help I beg the burning started raising above my legs. I think its death, now I have no breath!
“Lilly let go of me.” Lionel whispered hanging off, having one hand in my hand.
“Lionel what are you saying?” I was astonished by what he had just told me to do.
“Seriously, let go. I don’t deserve it Lilly, let go of my hand.”
“You want to leave me like everyone else?”
“I’m never going to leave you Lilly; I’m in your heart now. I’m not going to get out of there that easily.”
“Lionel I don’t want you to leave me.”
“But I have to Lillian Marwick. I have to leave you.”
“Lio please...”
“...Let go Lilly.” Lionel interrupted.
I slowly shut my eyes as a teardrop fell down onto his hand. I didn’t want to let go of him even though a bit of me forcefully wanted to let go.
“You are the one I cannot live without. You are the one that no one can replace. You are the one who knows my fears. Then why are you being the one that’s slowly leaving me alone knowing my fear?” I whispered to him with a little sniff.
“I love you Lillian.”
“I love you more Lionel.” I gently let go of his hand as he closed his eyes and fell off. I didn’t close my eyes, I saw him leave me fading away slowly, very slowly. As he started disappearing a vision came in front of my eyes. From the moment I met him till the moment he was hanging of a cliff having his hand in my hand.
“You let go of him Lilly?” Faith asks, her voice breaking in between. She stood leaning against her book cupboard with tissues held in her hands.
“Sometimes we have let go of stuff. But now I live, well lived in guilt that I killed him. I let go of him and he died.” I reply in a soft and slow tone of voice, with my eyes being so watery and red.
“And that's why you came to see me so you could release yourself and tell me your guilt.”
“Not just that, I just needed for someone to know this before I go. Anyways the session finished, sorry for going a little over time.” I wiped my tears and got out of my seat.
“Ah, it was worth taking my time. I’ll call you tomorrow and tell you when you come and see me next.”
“Oh you won’t need to see me again.”
“I might have one more time.”
I walk out of her room saying nothing, not even a goodbye. I walk out of passageway without looking around. I walk pass the receptionist giving her a big smile. I walk out of the building looking back one last time. I walk off to where I should be.
Next day came and Faith is so desperate to see me. She rang my mobile but I didn’t pick it up so she looks for my second emergency number, which is my house number. In happiness she rings my house number as my mother attends the call.
“Hello is this Lillian Marwicks house?” Faith talks kindly on the phone.
“Yes, yes this is Lillian’s house. Who’s speaking?” Her mother asks on the phone.
“Well I am her therapist, Faith Lockwood, I was just wondering if I could talk to Lillian so that we could make an appointment for today.”
“An appointment for therapist?” My mother replies seeming confused.
“Yes, I did tell her yesterday I would ring her and make an appointment.”
“Yesterday? Are you sure you have called the right Lillian? Lilly died three days ago.”
Faith’s face brings up a big shock as she holds the phone against her ear and drops the phone down. “She’s dead?” Faith tells herself still being in shock. “Then who was the one that told me the ending of the story?” She asks herself now being part of a mystery...
Your age?” The old receptionist lady asks out sitting at the reception desk with a form in front of her as well as a new customer. Sitting there still being loud and half annoyed half-tired sounding. She keeps looking up at the new person and then down at the piece of paper as she sighs after every two seconds. Sitting on that tall which still seems very old and weak chair, she seems to still feel very agitated.
“Twenty-three” the person answers
“Gender?”
“Male, last time I checked.” He giggles and replies.
“Sorry what did you say your name was again?”
“Mity, Lionel Mity.” The new customer answers.
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“Be happy as much as you want girl, at the end of the day we both are going to die.” I calmly said with a smile across my face.
“What do you mean both of us?” She asked enquiringly.
“Well if we think about it, I’m the driver here and you are the passenger. I’m in charge of the locks in this car and having a car safety thing going on in my mind the cars been put on child lock so there's no chance of you randomly jumping out of here, girl.”
“What on earth are you on about! Stop the car right now before I shoot you!” She ordered being a little scared.
I laughed out knowing how I would fully scare her. “One gun and five bullets Aiste. You wasted one on a vase two on Max and two on my sister Kat. With what built are you exactly going to kill me with?”
She looked at me in such terror, how did I figured all this out all a sudden? I could see her face filling up with sweat, as her throat was becoming drier and her life... Her life was becoming shorter.
“You killed my sister Aiste not some random innocent person. You’re going to pay for it. Not with money, with your life!” I broke out to her as she sat there frozen and confused.
“You realise we die together?” She tried to scare me.
“I’ve never been scared of death. I’ve only been scared of love and that fear... That fear I’ve overcome.” As we reach near the edge of a cliff I increased the speed of the car realising that the guys were behind me increasing their speed too. Getting right near the cliff end I drift the car side ways and jump out of the car rolling down the rough dusty ground as the car fall of from the edge of the cliff with Aiste being in there. Even though I said to her that she wouldn’t be able to escape from the car because I had it on child lock she forgot that the drivers door isn't on the same lock setting.
In a sudden the guys reached where I was and since their speed was so fast they couldn’t slow it down easily. The car stopped right at the end of the cliff half hanging off and the first person to break through the back car window hanging off was Logan followed by Sherry. They tried to pull themselves up as Lionel rushed to the back of the car and gave his hands out to both of them. The balance of the car was too much on their side, as the car couldn't keep self-balance. I rushed to side to see what was going on more clearly. I saw the three of them and couldn't find Mass. I was too worried about the three hanging guys to save their lives than Mass.
Lionel's hand slip from Logan and Sherry as they both loose their control and fall down the deep cliff fading away the lower they went. The fear of losing them hit me hard as I closed my eyes so tight and thought of Lionel. I ran towards the car and tried to get around to grab onto Lionel. I lost Sherry and Logan but I didn’t want to lose Lionel too. First time I loved someone, I couldn’t lose him. I had lost everyone I loved; I just simply couldn’t lose Lionel. I finally got a good grip of his hand as the car started moving about. I held him so tightly by the hand, it felt like I would never let go of him no matter what! The car fell of the cliff edge as Lionel was dangling of the cliff holding half onto my hand and half onto a rock that was against him. I looked intensely at him. After meeting him I found love, after knowing him I moved from my one and only fear. But after knowing him I lost a best friend and a sister. I don’t know where Mass is now, dead or alive? Lionel knew what was going on but never mentioned anything to me before everything got worse. I looked at him and saw the goods and bad. I was in confusion in what I wanted to do.
Blood spread everywhere on the floor. It didn’t miss a spot it was even on the door. It was pain that it showed. It was like every bit of me had exploded. It wasn’t war or love, neither was it pure as a dove. An unexpected rush, every part of me crushed. Simply felt like burning hell. Not soon after the horrifying sound of the bell. Breathing is becoming unfeasible. I was trapped not being releasable. Now I’m here unaware. The tension around I can not bare. Help me from where I am trapped. A bit of me is totally snapped. Help I beg the burning started raising above my legs. I think its death, now I have no breath!
“Lilly let go of me.” Lionel whispered hanging off, having one hand in my hand.
“Lionel what are you saying?” I was astonished by what he had just told me to do.
“Seriously, let go. I don’t deserve it Lilly, let go of my hand.”
“You want to leave me like everyone else?”
“I’m never going to leave you Lilly; I’m in your heart now. I’m not going to get out of there that easily.”
“Lionel I don’t want you to leave me.”
“But I have to Lillian Marwick. I have to leave you.”
“Lio please...”
“...Let go Lilly.” Lionel interrupted.
I slowly shut my eyes as a teardrop fell down onto his hand. I didn’t want to let go of him even though a bit of me forcefully wanted to let go.
“You are the one I cannot live without. You are the one that no one can replace. You are the one who knows my fears. Then why are you being the one that’s slowly leaving me alone knowing my fear?” I whispered to him with a little sniff.
“I love you Lillian.”
“I love you more Lionel.” I gently let go of his hand as he closed his eyes and fell off. I didn’t close my eyes, I saw him leave me fading away slowly, very slowly. As he started disappearing a vision came in front of my eyes. From the moment I met him till the moment he was hanging of a cliff having his hand in my hand.
“You let go of him Lilly?” Faith asks, her voice breaking in between. She stood leaning against her book cupboard with tissues held in her hands.
“Sometimes we have let go of stuff. But now I live, well lived in guilt that I killed him. I let go of him and he died.” I reply in a soft and slow tone of voice, with my eyes being so watery and red.
“And that's why you came to see me so you could release yourself and tell me your guilt.”
“Not just that, I just needed for someone to know this before I go. Anyways the session finished, sorry for going a little over time.” I wiped my tears and got out of my seat.
“Ah, it was worth taking my time. I’ll call you tomorrow and tell you when you come and see me next.”
“Oh you won’t need to see me again.”
“I might have one more time.”
I walk out of her room saying nothing, not even a goodbye. I walk out of passageway without looking around. I walk pass the receptionist giving her a big smile. I walk out of the building looking back one last time. I walk off to where I should be.
Next day came and Faith is so desperate to see me. She rang my mobile but I didn’t pick it up so she looks for my second emergency number, which is my house number. In happiness she rings my house number as my mother attends the call.
“Hello is this Lillian Marwicks house?” Faith talks kindly on the phone.
“Yes, yes this is Lillian’s house. Who’s speaking?” Her mother asks on the phone.
“Well I am her therapist, Faith Lockwood, I was just wondering if I could talk to Lillian so that we could make an appointment for today.”
“An appointment for therapist?” My mother replies seeming confused.
“Yes, I did tell her yesterday I would ring her and make an appointment.”
“Yesterday? Are you sure you have called the right Lillian? Lilly died three days ago.”
Faith’s face brings up a big shock as she holds the phone against her ear and drops the phone down. “She’s dead?” Faith tells herself still being in shock. “Then who was the one that told me the ending of the story?” She asks herself now being part of a mystery...
Your age?” The old receptionist lady asks out sitting at the reception desk with a form in front of her as well as a new customer. Sitting there still being loud and half annoyed half-tired sounding. She keeps looking up at the new person and then down at the piece of paper as she sighs after every two seconds. Sitting on that tall which still seems very old and weak chair, she seems to still feel very agitated.
“Twenty-three” the person answers
“Gender?”
“Male, last time I checked.” He giggles and replies.
“Sorry what did you say your name was again?”
“Mity, Lionel Mity.” The new customer answers.
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Publication Date: 02-24-2013
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