I Love You More Than I'm Afraid (Our Forevers #2), Rebel Hart [best adventure books to read .txt] 📗

“Just because you blossomed. If she’d allowed you to help her along as well, you could both be more popular. Tristan is a very accepting boy. I’m sure he would have loved your friend right along with you.”

I looked down at what was left of the food on my plate, suddenly not feeling so hungry. I was feeling something between shame and guilt. Yes, Tristan would have loved Arden right along with me, given the fact that he was doing that now for Aria’s sake, but the issue was, Arden was already on the way out of my life before he and I started to date. Not that she didn’t have every right to be angry.

Turns out, people who are in love don’t date and kiss other people just for show. Once I had my braces removed, started wearing contacts and nails at the urging of my mother, the popular kids like Tristan and Ceradi started to take more notice of me. Tristan asked me out on a date, and knowing my parents wanted nothing more for me than to prove to them I was into guys, I accepted. Arden and I had never really put a label on what we were, so I thought it would be okay.

It was just for show, and it didn’t mean anything, but Arden called it cheating. She told me to cancel the date, and said that if they were really my friends they would hear me out when I said I was gay and had a girlfriend.

They did not.

When I first mentioned something about potentially being into women at all, they all thought I was joking. Just like with my parents, I wasn’t strong enough to face that ridicule and backed away, saying I wasn’t. Arden took it personally, as well she should have. I knew I wasn’t strong enough to stand up for Arden or our relationship to my new friends, so I did the thing I felt was best for us both.

I cut her off.

“I guess that’s just how it goes,” I said.

“Well…” My mom started, and I recognized her gossip voice coming from a mile away. “Maybe it’s better anyway. From what Fawna tells me, Arden has a new ‘special friend.’ Some girl named Aria.”

My stomach knotted at the mention of her name. What I knew defied what I saw and how I felt. Tristan and Aria were dating, and from what I could see when they were around one another, they were one another’s true loves, but Aria’s relationship with Arden made me uncomfortable. They were so snuggly and intimate with one another, and though Tristan and I were as close as the next set of besties, I didn’t like seeing it on them. I realized that was hypocritical, but just because I cut Arden off for her benefit, it didn’t mean my feelings were magically gone.

Besides, Aria was so perfect it was sickening.

“Yeah, I’ve heard of her,” I said. “I don’t like her very much.”

“I can imagine not if she’s leading Arden down such a sinful path,” my father responded.

God, I hated these conversations. The way I really felt and the way I was pretending to feel were all mixed together into a nasty sludge. I barely even knew what I thought anymore.

“I gotta go,” I said, standing up from my seat. I reached out for my plate, but my mom reached across and snagged it before I could get to it. “It’s okay, sweetheart, I got it. Have a good day at school.”

“Thanks.”

She stood up from her chair as well and walked around the table just as I was walking away and grabbed me by the arm. She leaned in, almost as if she didn’t want my dad to hear her, and whispered, “Maybe just try getting Arden away from Aria. I know you still care about her. You wouldn’t want her to be eternally damned, would you?”

I felt eternally damned in this conversation. “No. I’ll try,” I lied, but I knew even if that was something I wanted, I didn’t have that jurisdiction.

My mom pet my head and gave me a kiss on the cheek, and then patted my back to send me off. My dad called out to tell me to be careful driving, but I didn’t respond. Honestly, I wouldn’t mind if I found myself in a ditch on the way to school. Then I wouldn’t have to deal with getting to school and seeing Arden and Aria together.

No such fortune came my way.

I got to school just fine, and though I bumped into Tristan on the way in, any cheer he brought me quickly faded as we walked up to the seniors’ lockers and saw Aria and Arden. Arden had both her own backpack and Aria’s slung over her shoulders, while Aria was carrying a couple of to-go boxes. They were smiling at each other so radiantly it was blinding.

“Hey!” Aria greeted, running up to Tristan. Her arms were full with the to-go boxes, but she leaned her head up and Tristan didn’t hesitate to duck his head down to meet her for a kiss.

“How was breakfast?” Tristan asked.

“Good,” Aria replied. “I tricked Arden into letting me pay.”

Arden frowned as she walked over, her eyes going far-off like she was imagining a great, war-time memory. “I’ll never pee during a meal again.”

Tristan laughed. “Oh yeah, don’t pee, don’t go to ask for boxes, don’t drop your phone. She’ll get ya when you least expect it.”

Arden’s smile came back and it was like a punch in the face. “Thanks for letting me steal her.”

“Are you kidding? You’re the priority, I’m just the boyfriend,” Tristan replied.

“Hey, hey, hey,” Aria said, “at least fight over me, what’s with all the chivalry?” Then she smiled at me. “Morning, Hannah.”

I forced a smile. “Hey, Aria.” No matter how hard I tried not to, my eyes drifted to Arden’s, and she was looking back at me, seemingly