Lavengro, George Borrow [i love reading books txt] 📗
- Author: George Borrow
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“And I am glad to see you, Mr. Petulengro; but this is sad news which you tell me about Mrs. Hearne.”
“Somewhat dreary, brother; yet, perhaps, after all, it is a good thing that she is removed; she carried so much Devil’s tinder about with her, as the man said.”
“I am sorry for her,” said I; “more especially as I am the cause of her death—though the innocent one.”
“She could not bide you, brother, that’s certain; but that is no reason”—said Mr. Petulengro, balancing himself upon the saddle—“that is no reason why she should prepare drow to take away your essence of life, and, when disappointed, to hang herself upon a tree: if she was dissatisfied with you, she might have flown at you, and scratched your face; or, if she did not judge herself your match, she might have put down five shillings for a turn-up between you and someone she thought could beat you—myself, for example, and so the matter might have ended comfortably; but she was always too fond of covert ways, drows and brimstones. This is not the first poisoning affair she has been engaged in.”
“You allude to drabbing bawlor.”
“Bah!” said Mr. Petulengro; “there’s no harm in that. No, no! she has cast drows in her time for other guess things than bawlor; both Gorgios and Romans have tasted of them, and died. Did you never hear of the poisoned plum pudding?”
“Never.”
“Then I will tell you about it. It happened about six years ago, a few months after she had quitted us—she had gone first among her own people, as she called them; but there was another small party of Romans, with whom she soon became very intimate. It so happened that this small party got into trouble; whether it was about a horse or an ass, or passing bad money, no matter to you and me, who had no hand in the business; three or four of them were taken and lodged in—Castle, and amongst them was a woman; but the sherengro, or principal man of the party, and who it seems had most hand in the affair, was still at large. All of a sudden a rumour was spread abroad that the woman was about to play false, and to peach the rest. Said the principal man, when he heard it, ‘If she does, I am nashkado.’ Mrs. Hearne was then on a visit to the party, and when she heard the principal man take on so, she said: ‘But I suppose you know what to do?’ ‘I do not,’ said he. ‘Then hir mi devlis,’ said she, ‘you are a fool. But leave the matter to me, I know how to dispose of her in Roman fashion.’ Why she wanted to interfere in the matter, brother, I don’t know, unless it was from pure brimstoneness of disposition—she had no hand in the matter which had brought the party into trouble, she was only on a visit, and it had happened before she came; but she was always ready to give dangerous advice. Well, brother, the principal man listened to what she had to say, and let her do what she would; and she made a pudding, a very nice one, no doubt—for, besides plums, she put in drows and all the Roman condiments that she knew of; and she gave it to the principal man, and the principal man put it into a basket and directed it to the woman in—Castle, and the woman in the castle took it and—”
“Ate of it,” said I, “just like my case?”
“Quite different, brother; she took it, it is
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