The Photographer, Mary Carter [the best novels to read .TXT] 📗

Patience. I needed patience and a level head. “You should hire someone you know to be the surrogate.”

Fritz combed his fingers through his hair, starting from his forehead and going straight back.

“It might give you a measure of comfort.” I patted Itzhak, who had followed us into the office. I could tell the dog was also troubled by Amelia’s absence.

“Nothing’s giving me comfort right now, Delta.” He repeated that gesture of running his fingers through his hair. “I don’t know where the fuck my wife is.”

Fritz was obviously agitated. Even so, I needed to see the subject through to its logical conclusion. Granted, it was not the best timing, but it wasn’t likely that surrogacy would come up again in an organic way. “Listen,” I said, “there might be a woman who wants the experience of being pregnant. Or someone who loved being pregnant and wants that experience a second time. Or someone who needs the money. There are health benefits. Your risk of cancer and heart disease go down.”

“OK.” Fritz was staring at the monitor and didn’t respond.

“All of those reasons would pale compared to the reasons that a friend would do it. A good friend who cared about you would want to see you happy. I know that I would.”

He shifted his jaw to one side. “Yeah?” He was finally listening to me.

“I would do it for a good friend.”

He squinted. “For us?”

My whole body was vibrating with uncontainable energy. I tried to maintain poise and stillness. I didn’t want Fritz to know how high the stakes were for me. The lengths to which I would go. “Fritz, you and Amelia”—I took his hand in mine in a purposefully platonic gesture—“I love both of you. And I love Natalie too. I don’t think it’s appropriate.… Amelia is the one who should be having the conversation.”

“She’s not here. Did you notice?” His voice sounded choked and sarcastic all at once. “And it’s just as much my decision.”

“Is it?” I placed my other hand on top of his. “I think … I don’t want to offend you.”

Fritz looked down at the floor, clearly angered. “Fine. Talk to Amelia about it. If she’s not dead.”

I heard a noise in the doorway, looked up, and was stunned to see Amelia standing there.

CHAPTER SEVEN

Amelia wore an expression of divine bliss and looked strikingly pretty in spite of her wrinkled dress and faded makeup. The western light streamed through the wall of glass doors and across her face. She seemed to glow from the inside out.

Fritz stood up quickly.

With her chin tilted up and her chest expanded, Amelia was relishing the drama of her entrance. “I found our birth mother,” she announced. “I found our baby.”

Her words knocked the wind out of me.

Fritz’s eyes narrowed into thin slits in his face. His jaw was clenched. He pounded the desk with his fist. “Amelia, you can’t disappear for eight hours.”

“I found our baby,” she said. “There was no time this morning—I had to go straight to her house in New Jersey. She left me a message. Then I lost my cell phone; I left it in the car.”

My breath felt restricted, as if I were hiking at a high altitude. Now that Amelia had found a birth mother, I would have difficulty reversing her course.

I stood up. “Tell us, Amelia.” I did my best to smile.

Amelia took in my presence, but didn’t appear bothered by it. I might as well have been their dog. For an instant I recognized the modicum of space I occupied in her mind, but my love for her was not diminished. If anything, I wanted her affection even more.

“Fritz, this girl, Lucia”—Amelia looked directly at Fritz, her voice at a higher pitch than normal—“she’s a girl, she’s nineteen, but not an idiot. She’s Catholic and Latinx. She knows she’s not in a position to raise the baby. She gets it. No money, no resources, no husband. And so someone else should.” It was as if Amelia and Fritz were the only two people in the room now. She wasn’t aware that she was sharing the information with me or not sharing it. “Different cultures have different priorities, and it’s not for us to judge. They leave their children in their country and come here to work and send money each week. Or the grandparents raise them. It’s quite practical, really. And it’s smart. She’s smart. And she’s very pretty. White teeth. Clear skin. Glossy hair. And she’s slender. I mean, she’s pregnant, but her hips are slim.” She motioned in the air with her hands to outline the contours of the girl’s slim hips. “It’s not good for a pregnant woman to be fat, because then the baby will be too. I said yes to the baby.”

I felt as though all the oxygen were leaving the room. This was so wrong. It was all wrong. I needed to convince Amelia that she was making a mistake.

Fritz’s lips were white and his face had developed a grayish hue. His anger was simmering. He leaned against the sliding glass door and fixed his gaze on the exterior landscape.

“There was another couple.” Amelia was speaking rapidly and still in a high register. “I actually saw them leaving Lucia’s house. I saw their photo. They live in Manhattan and they want the baby too. Lucia told me they’re attorneys, but the woman plans to stop working and stay at home, or so she said to Lucia.” She perched on the edge of her desk. “Still, I’m pretty sure Lucia’s going to choose us. I told her all about you, Fritz. What a terrific father you are. I told her about Natalie—how excited she was for a little sister. It’s a girl, by the way. Lucia is having a girl.”

“I thought you were dead!” Fritz exploded, spitting at her. He slammed his fist into the nearby wall. He picked up a book from his desk and threw it