The Conjure Woman, Charles W. Chesnutt [reading women txt] 📗

b’lieve in dese yer readin’ en prayin’ niggers; it wuz all ’pocrisy, en sarve’ Mars Dugal’ right fer ’lowin’ Dave ter be readin’ books w’en it wuz ’g’in’ de law.

“W’en Mars Dugal hearn ’bout de ham, he say he wuz might’ly ’ceived en disapp’inted in Dave. He say he wouldn’ nebber hab no mo’ conferdence in no nigger, en Mars Walker could do des ez he wuz a mineter wid Dave er any er de res’ er de niggers. So Mars Walker tuk’n tied Dave up en gin ’im forty; en den he got some er dis yer wire clof w’at dey uses fer ter make sifters out’n, en tuk’n wrap’ it roun’ de ham en fasten it tergedder at de little een’. Den he tuk Dave down ter de blacksmif-shop, en had Unker Silas, de plantation blacksmif, fasten a chain ter de ham, en den fasten de yuther een’ er de chain roun’ Dave’s neck. En den he says ter Dave, sezee:⁠—

“ ‘Now, suh, yer’ll wear dat neckliss fer de nex’ six mont’s; en I ’spec’s yer ner none er de yuther niggers on dis plantation won’ steal no mo’ bacon dyoin’ er dat time.’

“Well, it des ’peared ez if fum dat time Dave didn’ hab nuffin but trouble. De niggers all turnt ag’in’ ’im, caze he be’n de ’casion er Mars Dugal’ turnin’ ’em all ober ter Mars Walker. Mars Dugal’ wa’n’t a bad marster hisse’f, but Mars Walker wuz hard ez a rock. Dave kep’ on sayin’ he didn’ take de ham, but none un ’em didn’ b’lieve ’im.

“Dilsey wa’n’t on de plantation w’en Dave wuz ’cused er stealin’ de bacon. Ole mist’iss had sont her ter town fer a week er so fer ter wait on one er her darters w’at had a young baby, en she didn’ fine out nuffin ’bout Dave’s trouble ’tel she got back ter de plantation. Dave had patien’ly endyoed de finger er scawn, en all de hard words w’at de niggers pile’ on ’im, caze he wuz sho’ Dilsey would stan’ by ’im, en wouldn’ b’lieve he wuz a rogue, ner none er de yuther tales de darkies wuz tellin’ ’bout ’im.

“W’en Dilsey come back fum town, en got down fum behine de buggy whar she b’en ridin’ wid ole mars, de fus’ nigger ’ooman she met says ter her⁠—

“ ‘Is yer seed Dave, Dilsey?’

“ ‘No, I ain’ seed Dave,’ says Dilsey.

“ ‘Yer des oughter look at dat nigger; reckon yer wouldn’ want ’im fer yo’ junesey no mo’. Mars Walker cotch ’im stealin’ bacon, en gone en fasten’ a ham roun’ his neck, so he can’t git it off’n hisse’f. He sut’nly do look quare.’ En den de ’ooman bus’ out laffin’ fit ter kill herse’f. W’en she got thoo laffin’ she up’n tole Dilsey all ’bout de ham, en all de yuther lies w’at de niggers be’n tellin’ on Dave.

“W’en Dilsey started down ter de quarters, who should she meet but Dave, comin’ in fum de cotton-fiel’. She turnt her head ter one side, en purten’ lack she didn’ seed Dave.

“ ‘Dilsey!’ sezee.

“Dilsey walk’ right on, en didn’ notice ’im.

“ ‘Oh, Dilsey!’

“Dilsey didn’ paid no ’tention ter ’im, en den Dave knowed some er de niggers be’n tellin’ her ’bout de ham. He felt monst’us bad, but he ’lowed ef he could des git Dilsey fer ter listen ter ’im fer a minute er so, he could make her b’lieve he didn’ stole de bacon. It wuz a week er two befo’ he could git a chance ter speak ter her ag’in; but fine’ly he cotch her down by de spring one day, en sezee:⁠—

“ ‘Dilsey, w’at fer yer won’ speak ter me, en purten’ lack yer doan see me? Dilsey, yer knows me too well fer ter b’lieve I’d steal, er do dis yuther wick’ness de niggers is all layin’ ter me⁠—yer knows I wouldn’ do dat, Dilsey. Yer ain’ gwine back on yo’ Dave, is yer?’

“But w’at Dave say didn’ hab no ’fec’ on Dilsey. Dem lies folks b’en tellin’ her had p’isen’ her min’ ’g’in’ Dave.

“ ‘I doan wanter talk ter no nigger,’ says she, ‘w’at be’n whip’ fer stealin’, en w’at gwine roun’ wid sich a lookin’ thing ez dat hung roun’ his neck. I’s a ’spectable gal, I is. W’at yer call dat, Dave? Is dat a cha’m fer ter keep off witches, er is it a noo kine er neckliss yer got?’

“Po’ Dave didn’ knowed w’at ter do. De las’ one he had ’pended on fer ter stan’ by ’im had gone back on ’im, en dey didn’ ’pear ter be nuffin mo’ wuf libbin’ fer. He couldn’ hol’ no mo’ pra’r-meetin’s, fer Mars Walker wouldn’ ’low ’im ter preach, en de darkies wouldn’ ’a’ listen’ ter ’im ef he had preach’. He didn’ eben hab his Bible fer ter comfort hisse’f wid, fer Mars Walker had tuk it erway fum ’im en burnt it up, en say ef he ketch any mo’ niggers wid Bibles on de plantation he’d do ’em wuss’n he done Dave.

“En ter make it still harder fer Dave, Dilsey tuk up wid Wiley. Dave could see him gwine up ter Aun’ Mahaly’s cabin, en settin’ out on de bench in de moonlight wid Dilsey, en singin’ sinful songs en playin’ de banjer. Dave use’ ter scrouch down behine de bushes, en wonder w’at de Lawd sen’ ’im all dem tribberlations fer.

“But all er Dave’s yuther troubles wa’n’t nuffin side er dat ham. He had wrap’ de chain roun’ wid a rag, so it didn’ hurt his neck; but w’eneber he went ter wuk, dat ham would be in his way; he had ter do his task, howsomedever, des de same ez ef he didn’ hab de ham. W’eneber he went ter lay down, dat ham would be in de way. Ef he turn ober in his sleep, dat ham would be tuggin’ at his neck. It wuz de las’ thing he seed at night, en de fus’ thing he seed in de mawnin’. W’eneber he