DEEP DOWN INSIDE, WILL CHANDLER [black books to read txt] 📗

INSIDE

I go about my business in an ordinary way,
I always do what I do best each and every day.
I give the look to people that’s pleasant and so kind,
But no one knows the deep sad pain that wrestles with my mind.

The reason for my sorrow is no unique affair,
Lots of folk clearly go through similar despair.
On the news they say that it happens every day,
Some children from a parent are simply torn away.

It’s no consolation though, that others go through this,
What seems to be so dark, to me a personal abyss.
And just as improvement comes and forms a ray of light,
I toss and turn with awful dreams as I try to sleep at night.

I’ve often thought about ending all this trouble deep strife
By doing something selfish and taking my own life.
It all sounds so dramatic I know and even extremely mad,
But I could never explain that things sometimes really feel that bad.

From birth to seven I raised that girl and never missed trace,
Of the things that growing up brings and the expressions on her face.
When she was born I was the first to touch her and embrace,
This baby girl who made her way into the human race.

As she grew into a little miss and learned some things from school,
This amazing darling certainly knew how to be nobody's fool.
And one thing she picked up, on which she didn’t linger,
Was how to wrap her proud daddy around her little finger.

I’ll always remember her smiling face greeting me at the gates,
Running out of her classroom along with all her mates.
Screaming “hey daddy what have brought for me to eat.”
For she always knew that I’d bring with me some sweet and tasty treat.

No doubt you’ve heard it all before for it is nothing new,
And folk will always tell tales of how their children grew.
For raising children is a blessing that many get to achieve,
From infancy to adulthood, and that’s when they usually leave.

Usually that is unless something rotten takes place,
When a partner turns around and slaps you in the face,
By leaving the matrimonial home and moving in with another,
And taking the little girl to live with her brand new lover.

And because she is her mother at me she did protest,
The courts will decide that being with her mum is the best.
I was left alone in a dark place and my mind was in a twirl,
And all I could really think about is losing my little girl.

I know it sounds harsh I know but I couldn't really care less
About my wife running off with another, I wished her all the best.
For many years she has in ways made my life a hell,
The abuse that I have had to endure, well I haven’t the strength to tell.

So this isn’t a story I tell to you about some old wayward spouse
Who had no sense or loyalty and courage like a mouse.
It is a tale of the result of this crazy woman’s mind,
To take that which I treasured most in leaving me behind.

Two years have passed since my darling girl was up and taken away,
And I can’t help but think about her each and every day.
My heart is broken in many pieces but what can I really do,
For she is gone far away from me now except for the odd visit or two.

So I continue to go living and doing good by what’s before,
And I have a amazing new wife who I really love and adore.
She has a lovely little girl too who is almost seven years old,
With a beautiful little face and hair like fine strands of gold.

There are so many blessings that now I can embrace,
They give strength to stay alive and continue in the race.
I refer to nothing of the sadness I feel, the pain of which I’ll hide,
And for now keep it all locked away in silence DEEP DOWN INSIDE.

Publication Date: 05-25-2011

All Rights Reserved

Dedication:
Dedicated to those who suffer in silence.