Thoughts, J. Morris [the beginning after the end novel read .txt] 📗

The Day You Went Away

 

Throughout the storm and the endless rain
Throughout the tears and eternal pain
The memory returns time and again
Of the day you went away. 

 

The garden you planted has turned to weeds
I couldn’t attend to its constant needs
My spirit is broken and my heart still bleeds
Since the day you went away 

 

The house that we shared is in disrepair
I’m ashamed to say that I no longer care
For it’s just not a home without you there
Now that you’ve gone away 

 

I walk through the park where we used to go
And I sit by the lake where we used to throw
bread to the ducks, and I miss you so
Since the day you went away 

 

You come to me each night in my dreams
You say you forgive me but to me it seems
That my self respect I can never redeem
Since I caused you to go away 

 

I can still hear the crash’s sickening sound
Still taste your last kiss as you lay on the ground
Oh how i wished time could be rewound
As I watched you slip away 

 

My world is now just a black hole in space
But deep in my mind there's a secret place
Where we meet each day and we kiss and embrace
And together, we drift away.

Evolution of Love

 

Across the bar,

Through smoky haze

Your eyes entice,

Your looks amaze
I'm interested

 

I watch you dance,

I hear you sing

Karaoke's

Just your thing
You sing to me

 

I say 'hi' 

'Steve's the name

I chat you up

 I'm on my game
I want you bad

 

We share a drink

We share your bed

I should have left

But stayed instead
You made me breakfast

 

Every night

Every day

Need you with me

Wish you'd stay
You own my heart

 

My mind is set

The die is cast

I offer you

a love that lasts

Marry me

 

You come to Vegas

Become my bride

Married by Elvis

Crazy ride
Make love all night

 

Give you a home

Lavish surrounds

My love for you

Knows no bounds
Happy ever after

 

Work two jobs

To make ends meet

You watch TV

All day and eat
WTF?

 

We go to bed

I kiss your cheek

Filthy hair

Your breath reeks
Where's my wife?

 

Eat so much

Your arse has grown

Cellulite legs

You constantly moan
Give me some peace

 

You dont clean

You dont cook

I ask for sex

You read a book
Hand and lube

 

I come home early

Dont mean to be rude

But why you in bed

With some random dude
Who isn't me

 

I kick his arse

Kick yours too

Get the fuck out

Both of you

Yeh, fuck you too

 

I throw your shit

Out the door

Good luck i say

Ugly whore
Take your fat arse with you

 

'Thanks for nothing

You curse and sneer

I say 'you're welcome

Anywhere but here'
Bitch...

Different Worlds

Different Worlds.
In her world her sky is blue
Her summer hot, Her winter bitter
Last Saturday she slept in
This morning she missed breakfast

 

In her world is her friend, Kate

Italian food’s her favourite

Her mother stayed with her all week
She’d argued with her father

In her world her daughter blossoms
She cried last month, when she started school
Her husband got promoted at work
A certified accountant

In her world are holidays
Camping trips and private beaches
Her brother married last July
He swore he never would

She's planned her daughter’s birthday party
Last night she watched a movie
Romantic comedy, she laughed and cried
I know all this; she told me.
-----------------------------------
In my world I smell her scent
I feel her hands upon my skin
She bathes me daily; dresses me
Her voice is calm and soothing

In my world I know her name.
Itself a comfort; so serene
I know her goodness, her pure heart
I know her beauty, though sight unseen

In my world I have no limbs

Or perhaps I do, I cannot tell

The only one that I can feel
Rises when she bathes me

If she knew of my awareness
Perhaps she would continue
It evokes in me a distant memory
A sense of hope, an unseen tear.

In my world are tubes and wires
A rythmic beeping of machines
A vague, incessant, distant chatter
My food flows from a hanging bag

In my world my silent screams
Go unanswered, go unheard
My words are trapped within my mind
My pleas for death just wasted thoughts

In my world I hear her sing
Happy birthday, happy birthday
And for her to hear my birthday wish
Would be the wish come true.

My darkened world has no view
There is only me, and only her
In my world I love her
And in my dreams she loves me too 

If Only

 

 

If only I had known before
If only I had seen
The consequences coming
From my actions so obscene 

 

If only I was noble
And my soul divine and pure
Instead of being the disease
I could have been the cure 

 

If only I had told my friends
The words I should have shared
To tell them they're important
To let them know I cared 

 

If only I had shown my love
To those who craved for it
To those who gave their love to me
Though my heart seemed cold and desolate 

 

If only my words were compliments
And not a loaded gun
My friends would not have turned away
Would not have cut and run 

 

If only I had made my bed
Before I laid down to die
I wouldn't be fearing eternity
As I head toward the sky

A Light Ahead

 

A long firm push

A light ahead

Free at last

Placenta is shed

 

Umbilical is cut

A mother’s caress

Warm loving hands

guide me to breast

 

One candle on a cake

I stand erect

I communicate

My mother protects

 

Loving kisses

Toys abound

Wondrous new world

is all around

 

I run with my friends

I graze my knee

I run pretty fast

For a boy of three

 

First day of school

A flood of tears

Mainly from Mum

From me, only cheers

 

A new bike for Christmas

I ride it to school

My favourite colour red

I’m looking so cool

 

I turn fifteen

And pimples appear

I hang out with friends

and taste my first beer

 

Hopelessly in love

with my classmate Sue

I ask my friend to ask her

if she likes me too

 

Seventeen years

A belated first kiss

Awkward fumbles

But sexual bliss 

 

Turn twenty one
     Key to the door
     Parties and women
     Couldn't ask for more

 

Twenty six years

Married for four

A loving wife

I cant help but adore

 

Second child born

A girl this time

So humble and grateful

For this life sublime

 

Promotion at work

A raise as well

More work to do

More cars to sell

 

Family vacations

Camping away

Loving and laughing

Come what may

 

All too soon

A mother and wife

Discovers the lump

That would soon take her life

 

Our tears are shed

Final memories are made
     The last rites read
     And her body is laid

 

Ashes to ashes

Dust to dust

Life goes on

For go on it must

 

Graduation day

A father’s face beams

A son comes of age

His head filled with dreams

 

A daughter finds love

Her wedding day looms

The house is soon silent

Now dark empty rooms 

 

A lover long gone

Just a face in a frame

And memories of her voice

Whispering my name

 

Long lonely nights

Cold empty days

A seat by her grave

In the sun’s warm rays

 

Years  fly by
     And time's running out
     And still no clue
     What this life's all about

 

A new song begun

But I fail to dance

To the new tune of life

And miss my chance

 

Seventy years old

By today’s standards, young

Yet the show’s almost over

The song's almost sung

 

My Summer’s been lived

My Autumn long gone

My Winter’s now here

And Great Grandchild born

 

Walking stick needed

Eyes barely see

Stroke slurs my speech

Arthritis takes my knees

 

A hospital bed

Faint voices are heard

I give them my love

With my final words

 

A daughter's last kiss

And her soft caress

A son holds my hand

A dying man blessed

 

A long dark tunnel

A light ahead

A new world awaits

My earthly ties shed

 

 

 

 

She

 

Before I met her, I had nothing

Now I have even less.

What I ever saw in her

I can never even guess

 

She stole my pride, destroyed my soul

And dignity during the course

She even took my testicles

Hers in the divorce

 

Her face could launch a thousand ships

But so could Adolph Hitler.

Why'd it take me so many years

To finally wake up and ditch her

 

Bitch....

Internet Connection