Facebook Posts and Other Stuff, Nora Lee [novel books to read txt] 📗

Tape Worm

My pet tape worm.

 

The best pet I ever had.

 

He was my jump rope.

 

When I felt bad.

 

His slime was my gloss when my lips did chap.

 

And he made a wonderful whip with a nice back slap.

 

He ate all the garbage I put under the table.

 

He scared my mom, when I was unable.

 

And when I got fat.

 

He helped me lose weight.

 

Because of him, I could eat.

 

And I ate.

 

My wonderful, pet tape worm.

 

Lee Press on Toes

Don't like your toes.

 

Try something new.

 

Lee Press on toes, at a store near you.

 

Get french toes.

 

Stuck up as a nose in the air.

 

Or, get witch toes.

 

With a molel growing hair.

 

Jesus Date

Me and Jesus.

 

Smoked some weed.

 

Me and Jesus.

 

Ate some feed.

 

Me and Jesus.

 

Broke some bread.

 

Metaphorically speaking we ate his head.

 

And then we drank his holy blood.

 

The wine was good, the wine was fun.

 

Then my butt tooted because of fate.

 

And my tummy grumbled thanks because I ate.

 

All and all, the date was fine.

 

Me and Jesus had a really good time.

Grape Cheap Wine

The grape cheap wine was calling.

 

Come.  Come get me.

 

I couldn't deny a friend who'd stuck with me.

 

And when I felt sad.

 

And when I felt blue.

 

The grape, cheap wine would help me through.

 

The good times and the bad.

 

My grape, cheap wine has been with me.

 

To console and lift me.

 

Grape, cheap wine, my best friend.

 

Will be with me until the bitter end.

 

Legion

We are everywhere and nowhere.

 

Watching, influencing, intervening.

 

Look for the unnoticed and you might see us.

 

Perhaps we are watching you now.

 

Outside your window or beyond the trees.

 

In your room while you are sleeping.

 

We are many, we are Legion.

 

We will be coming for you soon.

Shadow

I can't get rid of my  shadow.

 

I tried to sever the ties.

 

My only friend my shadow.

 

The darkness undoes the binds.

 

Temporary relief from my shadow.

 

Resting in darkness lies.

 

Into the dark my shadow.

 

Cease your battle cries.

Playing with Myself

Today I played with myself.

 

I won every game.

 

I wiped the floor with myself.

 

I dominated myself at every opportunity.

 

I made myself cry.

 

What a poor sport I am.

 

Nobody can beat me.

 

Not even me.

Secret Room

I have a secret room.

 

It has a secret door.

 

It has a secret combination.

 

That has a secret meaning.

 

That inspires a secret response.

 

To a secret question.

 

That I keep secret from myself.

Bathroom

A certain room in my house.

 

It is like a palace.

 

It has a throne.

 

And is a pretty blue tone.

 

It's the only place in the world.

 

I can get total privacy.

 

And Prince John is as clean.

 

As a toilet bowl ought to be.

 

The water is plentiful.

 

That's why it's so cool.

 

Where I can think and read as I sit on a stool.

God is a Perv

I was on the toilet.

 

I could feel her watching.

 

I was taking a shower.

 

I could feel her watching.

 

I was getting dressed.

 

I could feel her watching.

 

And guess what?

 

She's watching you too.

 

Doing god knows what.

 

As you sit there, vulnerable and exposed.

 

Tried to get a restraining order.

 

Tried to press charges.

 

God doesn't have a social security number.

 

Therefore, doesn't exist in the eyes of the law.

Dolls

 My dolls keep telling me I'm not real.

 

They tell me my thoughts are not my own.

 

The insist my thoughts, personality, and feelings are coming from them.

 

They say I am their puppet.

Shoe

Oh, almighty shoe!

 

I like you alot.

 

Your tread is a neat nail file

 

You make a great plant pot.

 

You protect my foot from debris

 

I use you as a chew toy

 

You help me do so many things.

 

That's why you're such a joy.