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Spiders

Did you know?

 

The spiders are watching you always.

 

You are the most interestinng thing in their world.

 

They gaze intensly with all eight eyes.

 

They make their webs to catch your heart.

 

They are waiting for you to sleep.

 

So they can hug you with all eight arms.

 

Don't worry.

 

They don't bite too hard.

 

They give you spider kisses.

 

They leave spider hickeys.

 

You belong to them now.

Flies

The flies like me.

 

I'm the fly whisperer.

Tunnels

Last night I lost my keys.

 

I looked everywhere.

 

Under the bed.

 

In my shoes.

 

On my desk.

 

In the freezer.

 

No luck.

 

Then I tripped and the keys fell out of my vagina.

 

I didn't even remember putting them there.

 

I was amazed.

 

I inspected the area and found out my vagina is a portal to another dimension.

 

Inside there is a whole universe of planets and civilizations.

Dream

I came out of someone's dream.

 

It sounds strange, but it's true.

 

Dreams are not just imagination.

 

When dreaming, consciousness goes to a different dimension that actually exist.

 

There are real beings in your dreams.

 

Some of these beings are killers.

 

If you die in your dreams you are stuck in the dream world.

 

It's O.K.

 

In dreams you can fly, teleport, telepath, shape-shift, mind control, etcetera....

 

You can be a demon, a monster, a god.

 

No dream is impossible, and you can have them all.

 

Perhaps, I will see you in your sleep.

 

I haven't decided if I should kill you there.

 

Cat's Tales

Most people don't know this, but I  have a tail.

 

It looks like a cat's tail.

 

I've had to hide it for years.

 

What about you?

 

Are you hiding anything?

 

Hoofs, wings, or horns?

Monster Energy Drink

Did you know?

 

Monster Energy drink only contains a finite amount of goats blood.

 

It is the ectoplasm from the witch's bile that gives Monster Energy drink  most of its supernatural abilities.

 

Making horns and fangs stronger and more vibrant.

 

Making feathers, fur, scales, or skin have a luminescent green glow.

 

The goat's blood is just a binding agent to protect the consumer from the evil eye.

 

The ground up devil's tooth, from a real devil, is what gradually summons the unique beast

within each and every one of us.

 

Every drink brings the consumer closer to the monster they truly are.

Wings

 Surgically attaching wings for cosmetic purposes is, of course, easier than attaching wings for functionality.  When attaching wings for cosmetic reasons it is only important that the wings move to show expression based on the persons brain state.  It is a matter of having the wings made out of proper density metal and attached to the spine.  This will allow the electrical nervous system to power the movement, while having the wings programmed to detect the brain impulses, also through the electrical nervous system.

 

This is in contrast to attaching wings for functionality.  The whole system must be overhauled.  The entire skeletal system must be systematically replaced with light density metal bones.  The brain must be electromagnetically copied and moved to a lighter density storage unit; to replace the heavy brain material.  Organs must be modified for optimal lightness.   All of this must be connected back to the spine.  The wings must also be fast like a hummingbird, so flight can be maintained.

Wishing Machine

I bought a wishing machine at Fred Meyer.

 

It was in the clearance bin for $9.99.

 

It was originally $1 Million.

 

It came standard with wi-fi and rechargeable battery.

 

What should I wish for first?

 

 

Hannibal

I turn into a predator.

You turn into prey.

 I pray you don't see me.

Coming what may.

 

Heart pounding closer.

I see you.

And licking my lips.

Stalk you.

 

My love bite awaits.

You'll be delicious.

I'm getting closer.

Are you suspicious?

 

There's no use in running.

I'll have what is mine.

My heart is hungry.

On you I will dine.

Tongue

His tongue breaths spells into me.

 

Is agile and strong.

 

Bends vibrations to his will.

 

Makes me think strange thoughts.

 

Licks my wounds.

 

Conjures, corrupts, and disrepects me.

 

Repeatedly and often.

 

And I like it.

Black Widow

Let me be your black widow.

 

I'll tie you up in my web.

 

I'll gaze at you with multiple eyes.

 

I'll embrace you with multiple arms.

 

I'll make you lose all reason.

 

You'll lose your head.

 

And your heart.

 

I'll give you my body.

 

And devour your soul.

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