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Blake looked up from his book as the door to the smallest of the Sinclair’s five libraries opened and Jesse walked in and froze as soon as she saw him in one of high wing-backed chairs. She looked hesitantly from him to the door, unsure whether to stay or leave. He made her question everything.
He sighed and stood up, she was as beautiful as always with long blonde platinum hair down to her waist and green eyes the exact shade of an emerald in the sunlight. She wrung her slender hands nervously as Blake took in her tall slender form in her leggings, boots, and sweater dress. She was simply breathtaking.
Jesse was thinking the same thing. He was stunning with thick black hair and grey eyes. His features were completely rugged and hard, as if he was carved from stone. His tall, solid form was outlined in the tight jeans he wore that showcased his long, lean legs and the button up shirt that emphasized his hard chest and strong arms.
She had felt completely at ease with him, “had” being the key word. Before...no ,she wasn’t going to think about that. Not ever again. Nothing could ever happen between them because of her past. The past he didn’t know about. But she was nervous around him now and she didn’t know how to make the nervousness go away.
“Are you that scared of me you won’t even be in the same room as me when no one else is around?” he asked gently.
“N-no,” she stuttered looking for an escape route.
“Liar,” he accused coming towards her slowly, so not to make her flee
She had been avoiding him since that day and this was the first time he had seen her alone since then, except when she was mad. He was trying not to scare her off, but by the way she shifting nervously, it wasn’t working.
Her head lifted, and she meet his gaze unflinching, “I’m not lying.”
“Yes, you are. What are you scared of Jess?” he asked softly, already knowing the answer.
His eyes glazed over as he thought about that day almost two months ago when everything had changed. When their invincible friendship had disappeared and been replaced by a tentative, fragile thing that she was fighting with all her might. Even he wasn’t sure what he wanted out of this new relationship, but, he wanted to see where this would go but she wasn’t even giving them a chance. He stopped fighting the memory and let it come.


It was a cool summer day and Blake was helping Jesse with a difficult spell. She was getting more annoyed by the minute with every failed attempt.
“I can’t do it Blake!’ she sighed, stomping her foot like an angry child.
“Try again,” he said calmly. With anyone else he would have been ready to slap the person for their stupidity. But with her, he had more patience than he would have ever thought he’d possessed.
“Okay,” she shut her eyes tight and wrinkled up her nose as she tried to focus. After a few minutes she flung her hands up, “I give up!”
He opened his own eyes and frowned. Tears of frustration pricked her emerald eyes. He was the only one she let her vulnerability show. It made him oddly protective of her. He moved towards her and framed her face in his large, strong hands.
“Hey, hey, hey. You’ll get it Jess. I promise.” he whispered his face scant inches from her own.
“I’m not good enough. I’ll never get it,” she whispered her eyes peering up to his own.
“You will. You’ve only been practicing magic for five years and you are trying to learn spells that took me twice that to learn. Your good, Jess better than I am you just need some time. You have been able to do things that even I haven’t yet. You’ll get it. I can’t imagine how tough it was trying to learn how to handle what you were all alone.”
She looked away from his gaze, “It was.”
He gently lifted her chin up to meet his gaze, “whenever someone brings up your life before you get sad. Why is that? You never talk about it even, with me.”
“I’ll tell you. One day,” she said with a sad smile.
“Someone hurt you,” he guessed.
she shrugged as best should could with his hands on her pretty face. “Something like that.”
“How come you never date? There are plenty of members of the pack who would love to take you out.”
“I don’t want to date any of them,” she said impulsively. Then added, “I’ve never dated before, I wouldn’t know what to do,” when he looked surprised.
“I know you haven’t dated anyone Jess. You have lived with us since you were fourteen! I just didn’t know you didn’t think any of the guys attractive. I mean they are.”
“Be careful you wouldn’t want people to think you had a crush on guys,” she said with a laugh.
He looked at her suspiciously, “Jesse, have you ever been kissed?”
She looked down and that was answer enough for him.
“Why not?”
“I never liked anyone enough,” she murmured simply.
He looked down at her soft face and creamy complexion and suddenly for some unexplainable reason wanted to kiss her desperately.
“Do like me enough?”
“Enough to what?”
He ran his thumb across her high cheekbones, “To let me kiss you.”
She sucked in a surprised breath, “What? Why?”
“Because I want to, and because it’s you.”
“What does that mean?” she asked quietly.
“I’ll tell you one day.”
“Yes,” she murmured.
“Yes what?” he asked.
“I like you enough to let you.”
“Thank God,” He breathed out and slid an arm around her waist and crushed her against his chest.
His free hand slid into her hair as he brought his firm mouth against her soft one. She knew next to nothing about kissing but she was following exactly where he lead. Her eyes were closed tightly and she clung to him tightly, her hands fisted tightly in the fabric of his shirt. His mouth slid torturously against her own and suddenly during the onslaught of his mouth, their friendship changed into something new, and undeniably special.
He pulled back and looked into her dazed green eyes, he smiled faintly and kissed her softly again. He pulled back again and smiled at her brightly. She smiled back still dazed.
“I know you Jess. You are going to regret this tomorrow. Don’t,” he said gently brushing a hand over her head.
She smiled contently and leaned her head against his hard chest. “I won’t,” she promised.




But she had and here they were, her avoiding him like the plague, and him lashing out at her because she wouldn’t come near enough for him to talk her.
“What are you scared of Jesse ?” he asked gently.
Jesse looked down at her feet, she couldn’t tell him she was scared of losing him, or that she was scared of disappointing him. All she could do pray he would understand.
“Tell me,” he said quietly.
“I can’t,” she whispered still not meeting his gaze.
“You can. You can always tell me anything.”
She looked up for a minute, “I’m scared.”
He smiled faintly, “Why? I’m not.”
“Because,” she murmured. “Nothing is my life has ever been permanent. This, whatever it is, isn’t going to be permanent either. And when this ends, I will be hurt, not you.”
So she is scared of being hurt? Which is all I have been doing lately, he thought sadly. He stepped towards her and brushed her blonde hair out of her face. “What if it does last?”
She smiled harshly, “we are too young for forever after, and nothing lasts forever. I learned that the hard way.”
He looked at her cautiously, she was still fighting the idea of being together. “What happened to you Jess? You can tell me. I won’t judge you.”
She shook her head, “I can’t.”
He framed her pretty face in his large hands, “You can.”
She shook her head again and tears formed in her wide eyes.
He pressed a gentle kiss to her forehead, “tell me.”
She sighed, “When I was ten I was moved to a foster home with an two other girls. I lived there till I was fourteen,” she took a deep breath and tears spilled down her face. “He raped and beat us. He would switch off who he raped but he never failed to hit us at least once a day.”
He just looked at her not wanting to believe what she was saying. In his wildest dreams he would never have imagined she would have told him that.
“One day I blew up the cell he had us in and ran away with the other girls. I never told anyone what he did to me. He said he would kill me if I talked. Right after that my case worker realized I was a castor and brought me here.”
He stared at her still in shock and not knowing what to say to make it better.
She looked up at him with fat tears running down her pale face. “Please say something,” she begged quietly.
He didn’t know what to say so he wrapped his his arms around her and pulled her into his chest tightly and laid his cheek on her head. “I’m so sorry Jess. I would give anything to spare you from that.”
“I was so scared to tell you. To tell anyone,” she said looping her arms around his waist and pillowing her head on his hard chest.
“But you did tell me. You’re safe now. Your safe with me,” he said kissing her temple gently.
“Now you see why nothing can ever happen between us. I’m broken.”
“You didn’t seem broken when I kissed you.”
She laughed, as was his intention but sobered, “This can’t happen. I value our friendship too much to ruin it.”
“You have to take a chance sometime Jess.”
She shook her head and looked up at him quietly, “I can’t. Not yet.”
“I can wait.”
She smiled, “you might have to wait a long time.”
“We can deal.”
She sighed, “Give me some time. But while we wait would you mind..?” she paused and blushed furiously.
“Mind what?”
“Kissing me again?”
He smiled and gently framed her face in his hands and gently kissed her with breathless tenderness, making sure it counted because he wasn’t sure when he would be able to kiss her again. Jesse clung breathlessly to his shirtfront as he gently kissed her within an inch of her life. He pulled back and smiled at her dazed eyes.
“For someone who never kissed someone before me you sure learn quick,” he said with a soft smile.
She blushed prettily and looked away from his gentle eyes, “I had a good teacher,” she said quietly.
He chuckled and looked down at her softly. He wanted to fold her into him and hold onto her until the pain disappeared. “Do you want to go somewhere with me?”
She looked up her, her green eyes sad and worrisome. “Where?”
He smiled, “on my bike. Like old times.We will go to my second favorite place.”
“I don’t know,” she started.
“Just make an impulsive decision. Just once,” he pleaded.
She looked down and away, then back at him. “Okay,” she murmured

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