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without even a warning. Ahi che male! (Ahi, that hurts)

“Why did you that for?” I shouted at her angrily.

“Because we're doing late.” She replied.

“That's why you pushed me down?”

“YES!” She replied angrily too. “Now, hurry up and get dressed, we have just 30 minutes to get back to our dorm." Then  she opened the lockers in the wall behind her and started to get dressed.

I stood up massaging my back. "We have a manager remember? He would have been already here telling us if we’re doing late or n-" I didn't even finished the sentence, that he showed up slamming the door. There were also Kim Min Hae and Yun Baek Ki behind him.

"Ah you're awake. I thought you were still asleep.” He begun. “We have no much time, come out. Palli!" He said in a hurry, but when he noticed that we were half naked, he immediately blushed and covered his eyes. Yes, our manager is a man. “Oh Sorry! I didn’t notice you were still undressed. Put some clothes on and come out when you're ready.” He mumbled with his eyes still covered.

“Okay.” We replied.

Then before closing the door. Kim Min Hae and Yun Baek Ki hurried us too. “Palli eonis. We want to eat before going back to our dormitory.” They said and we nodded.

When the manager closed the door, Yang Suk Ki glanced at me with a told-you-so-look on her face. “Oh Shut up.” I said glaring at her.

When we finished to get dressed, we reached the girls in the bar/restaurant. They were already eating, so we sat next to Kim Min Hae and Yun Baek Ki and started to eat too. While the others ate noodles with pork belly, I ordered kimchi with rice. Hmm mashiketa.

“Eoni!” Kim Min Hae called me while I was eating, I lifted my head from the kimchi’s boll and I looked at her, with my mouth still full of food. Just like that, without thinking.

“D.e..” I mumbled because my mouth was full of food. Big mistake. She had her phone in her hand and she took advantage to capture me that exact moment. I swallowed the food before asking what the hell was she doing. "Ya! What you think you're doing?" She just giggled and ran away, I was about to run after her, but Yang Suk Ki eoni stopped grasping my arm. I looked at her confused. “What?”

“Don't you remember that you nominated her as your instagram's admin? Since You stopped to post sefies of yourself” She reminded me. I knew it but I didn’t like it anyway. She let go of my arm. “She had to take it.” She added.

“Yeah, but I'll look ugly in that picture for sure!” I exclaimed whimpered.

“You were not ugly, puffy and funny I'd say.” She replied and chuckled lightly.

“That's not the comfort I was looking for.” I muttered. I sat back on my seat. She restarted to eat and so did I. But then she stopped and looked at me. “What?” I asked.

“Earlier, in the massage room, you wanted to talk about something right?” She asked me.

“Ah..Ye.” I nodded.

“So?” She said eager to know. Firstly, I checked that there weren't any damn cameras filming us  around. “The cameramen are eating just like us. So don't worry and talk.” She assured me.

“Ok then, here it is.” I begun. “How am I supposed to act with Ji Yong? I mean, after what happened.” I asked her. I really needed a friend's advice.

“What do you mean?" She simply asked me.

“Well You know..He kissed me without asking me first? How am I supposed to act the next time we meet? It’s not like I can stay mad at him forever.”

“First of all, tell me how you felt when he kissed you?” She asked.

I was embarrassed, but I had to tell her, to solve this problem. “I..enjoyed it obviously.” I felt my cheeks burning, but I continued. “But when I understood, that he just wanted to persuade me and shut me up, I got mad at him.”

“And you told me yesterday that you pushed him away right?”

“Right.”

She nodded. “But what you really wanted to do at first?” She asked then.

“Well, I just wanted to punch him, but then I reminded that he is a celebrity and he can't have scars on that perfect skin of his.” Damn perfect skin!

“And now that you calmed down, what you wanna do?” I hoped she had a point.

“I just want to solve this situation.” I expressed what I felt. “Just that.”

She nodded again. “Then here is what you have to do. When you the two of you meet again, Tell him that you want to talk with him. A private room would be suitable. Then when you’re alone in the room, punch him right away in the stomach. It's not a visible part of the body, so nobody will notice that you punched him." She suggested me. “Then solve the problem talking and.. sucking each other's mouth.” She said at the end. And smiled too.

“EONI!” I exclaimed blushing like a tomato. I fanned my face.

She rolled up her eyes. “You know that you want it too.” She replied. “Plus if you act too shyly in front of him, it might misunderstand it for indifference.” She added.

“But..” I complained even if she was right.

“No buts.” She cut me off. “You have to be sincere with your feelings Yumi-ha. If you're not sincere, you might get confuse with what you want and what you need, Araccì?" She explained serious.

I nodded. “It's that what you’ve done with your boyfriend before making up with him?” I asked her.

“Of course.” She answered. “I was confused with my feelings too, but in the end I knew what to do.”

“Ah. I got it.” I had no choice but to talk with him, and hope in a happy ending.

“Why didn't you accept his propose of dating secretly anyway?" She asked curious.

“You know, I'm bad with lies, figures dating him secretly. People would understand that I'm lying in no time.” I said remembering the time I criticized him, in front of the cameras, in the president's office, calling him crazy and idiot. I sighed.

She sighed too. “True.” She admitted. My phone rang right then. It was a message from the above-cited guy. I instantly read it. “What it says?” She asked spying on it.

“He says *Hey Yumi, I want to talk to you about what happened yesterday in the president's office. And give you also some news.* Finished.” I read it unsatisfied.

“Wait? What? There's nothing more?” She asked.

“Yeah, just. *Bye GD*”

“Oh.” She sounded disappointed. “I don’t know why, but I was expecting more.” She frowned.

“You tell me.” I said. I was agree with her. “I hope that at least the news are good.”

“I think they're gonna be good.” She said and sounded convinced of what she was saying, but I wasn't so sure of it.

“How's that you're so sure?” I asked her.

“Because the positive side of me says so.” She simply replied.

“Well, the negative side of me, tells different.”

“You're always negative!” She complained.

“And you're always positive!” I objected too.

“Touché!” She gave up. “Now, let's stop and let's go back to our dorm, so you guys can finally talk.” She said standing up from the chair.

I did the same. "Okay.”

“Without cameras obviously.” She added while reaching the other girls.

“And how the hell we're supposed to do that? They're cameras everywhere.” I complained next to her.

“Molla..” She simply replied.  Sometimes she was helpful. Sometimes, like back then, she wasn't. At all. I sighed.

 

 

 

04.More than a crush

YUMI

When we returned to YG building, I searched him around with my eyes, but nothing.  He was nowhere to be found. So I sent him a message saying that I wanted to talk with him and that I was waiting for him at our usual reading-spot, known as the dining table of our dorm. While waiting, I read some mangas. A lot of mangas. But he didn't show up. I started to doubt he would have ever came; the pessimist inside of me went nuts and made me imagine every possible and impossible reasons why he didn't come. Maybe I exaggerated when I pushed him away! Did he take it that badly? I was about to go crazy, when someone called me. I turned my head to see the president.

“De sunbaenim?” I quickly stood up and bowed to him.

“Come with me.” He simply said. He didn't look angry, so I followed him. I left the room under the curious glances of the girls.

I followed him all the way around the corridors untill we arrived in front of the Big Bang’s studio door. He knocked on it and a voice inside invited him to come in. We entered in the room. I saw Choi Seunghyun reading some magazine laid on the sofa. I greeted him waving my hand at him and he did the same. Then inside, the president closed the door with the keys. I frowned. I was nervous and quite confused.

“Yumi-ha.” He president called me catching back my attention.

“De?” I mumbled confused.

“Ji Yong told you that he has to talk with you right?” He asked.

I nodded. “But how did know that?” I asked.

“He told me about it when we were in my office.” He answered in a hurry. I nodded even if I didn’t understand the situation I was in. “Anyway, he's waiting for you in his room. You can talk with him there.” He said.

“But why didn't he come himself to me?” I asked, since I waited for him or all this time.

“Because I didn't want the cameras to be around filming you guys.” He explained. In fact there weren't any cameras around.

“Ah.” That made some sense. He headed towards Ji Yong room's door and opened it without knocking on it. Inside there were Ji Yong and Youngbae, who wished good luck to Ji Yong and left the room as soon as he saw us. The president pushed me inside and glanced at Ji Yong.

“Don't take it too long, I can't stay here forever.” He said to him.

“De.” Ji Yong answered politely.

“And don't do stuff', just talk okay?” He claimed.

"De." He replied not more so politely. We can do that only when we solve our problem. I wanted to say, but I didn’t open my mouth.

“Yumi-ha.” He called me.

“De?”

“If he tries something on you, scream and I'll come right away okay?” The president said to me.

"Okay.” I nodded.

“Okay then see ya.” He ended and closed the door leaving us alone.

 

We stayed silent for quite a while when he left. Awkward. Three more minutes of silence passed, but I didn’t know how to break it without sounding mad. Luckily he broke the silence first. I was still standing in front of him, so I noticed how much he was nervous and ashamed he was.

“Yumi..” He begun looking suddenly at me, with those shiny brown eyes of his. “I want to apologize for what I said and did yesterday. I know I've been a real jerk, to hush you by kissing you, without your permission too. I don't deserve your pardon, but I hope that you'll give me at least the chance to proove you that I'm really, a good guy. And not the prick of yesterday.” He said with a sincere and apologetic voice. He

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