Talking Eyes, Mia Lafreve Pedretti [beach read book .txt] 📗

I Lie, just like everybody else.

But my eyes betray me, all the time.

Look away, look away now!!

I repeat to myself, multiple times.

But I'm too weak and

and too in love...

Ji Yong sighed, not knowing what else to say. "I spend some time with Choi Seunghyun Oppa too, and we do way more skinship than I do with Ji Yong Oppa." I objected. "Why don't they notice that?" I asked him.

"I don't know." The president answered sincerely this time. He briefly glanced at Ji Yong, then laid again his eyes on me. "But they see something more between you two than between you and Choi Seunghyun." He said, glancing at Ji Yong again.

"And what is that?" I was tired now.

"Love." He answered in a straightfoward tone.

"...Love?" I asked, pretending that I was confused. Because inside, I was shaking with a terrible fear. What betrayed me? What? I took a deep breath before speaking again. "Where?" I asked.

To realise a dream, you need a lot of time. And to regain happyness again after a loss, you need  even more time.

When there are other people around you, and your friends and parents know about your dream and cheer for you, this dream can become a reality in no time. All thanks to their support. Because nothing can be achieved by yourself.

But what if, the people you care the most about disappear...die. What can you do then? Can you continue to run after that dream even without their presence? Without their heat? Can you even continue to live without them? That's what I kept asking myself when my parent died.

My name is Lee Yun Mi Maria Martelli and I had a dream back then: to become a YG singer. I had planned out everything. From when I would have finished high school, leave my country, Italy, and then fly to South Korea and partecipate in YG's auditions. Go through training and then debut. I wanted to go there not only because my favourite group, Big Bang, was there, but also because I was unconditionally attached to the country itself. I was super excited to go there. But then ...on a bright day of July, me and my family calmly driving on our way to the beach for the holidays, got into a car accident.

Even when we were trapped in the car, all of us bleeding and badly injured, I seriously thought that we would have survived. Even till the end. But things never goes the way you want them to. So.. I lost my parents. I lost the people I cherished the most. When I woke up from the coma, the reality hit me twice hard then I expected. That neither the physical pain could be compare to the one of my heart. A real bad awakening don't you think? Maybe it would have been better to just sleep...forever.

I don't know how we made it, but we made it. My brother and I healed from all those wounds after many months. Almost a year to be exact. After we passed through that phase, we had to face the psychological consequences of the accident. Taking pills has been helpful, especially with my brother. After he left the hospital, he went back to uni, He graduated and met a nice girl there named Claire. They rented an apartment all for them, and went to live together. Now they're even planning to get married on June 5. And naturally I was invited as the bridesmaid.

As for me, I went to live with my uncles and watched from afar as my brother carried on with his life. Happy, without worries or desires to die like me. My body didn't have any problem, it was my mind that wasn't still able to move from the loss of my parents. And nightmares kept haunting me day and night and I didn't know what to do. My brothertried several times to help me and even hired a psicologue, but it served nothing. Then he gave me an ultimatum, saying that if I kept going like that, he would have no other choice but to send me to a mental hospital. So, with that threat and because I was tired too of being depressed all the time, I rolled up my sleeves and worked out for a better life. I restarted to run after my dream as well.

I convinced my uncles to let me go to South Korea. They accepted, on condition that my uncles from mother side would have took care of me during that time. So I went there, formed my own band, Sweet Stones, formed by Me the main vocalist and lyricst/producer, Yang Suk Ki(24) the lead singer and bassist; Yun Baek Ki(16) the producer/rapper and guitarist; and last but not least, Kim Min Hae(19) the drummer. We auditioned and waited for the response. I wasn't sure they would have taken us in, since we only did rock music. Many told us that we were fools and to not let the hunger for popularity obscure our music and lead us to wrong paths. But I followed my guts, that never ever disapointed me, so ignored all those people and waited for their response anyway. I don't know if Yang Hyun Suk sunbaenim was crazy just like me, for choosing to audition for them instead of going to Woolim Ent, but he took us in. We got accepted. The first rock band debuted under YG ent and also thanks to those girls, I stopped having nightmares and panic attacks everytime I stepped into a car. Yang Suk Ki has been the most helpful one. She always stayed by my side and showed me the brighter side of the world when I wasn't feeling even living in it. Spending time with BIG BANG's member helped me a lot too. Choi Seung Hyun Oppa,  and Kwon Ji Yong, helped me with care and gentilessy. And I'm really thankful for that.

But to some people all these attention from Ji Yong were suspicious, and so they started to spread the rumors that there was more than a simple friendship between me and Ji Yong. Even though it was true that I had a crush on him, I knew It wasn't mutual.  Well, I was sure of it until the president called me and Ji Yong into his office. He said he had some news for us. Bad news.

~~~~~ 

"WHAT? Why can't I go to the Talk Show with Ji Yong Oppa and the others seniors?" I almost shouted in the president's face. Looking at him from the opposite of his desk, he didn't flinch nor got annoyed by my boiling temper. Maybe he knew that I would have reacted that way.

"Because the rumors says that you two have a relationship. And I suspect that they invited you, Just to question you guys about your ...hypothetical relationship." He explained.

"What? We aren't together, why people don't get that?" That was what I wanted to get in everyone's head, and by everyone, I meant Ji Yong's jealous fans. They were really starting to get on my nerves. It wasn't just annoying but also painful because I did have a crush on him, but wasn't mutual. I mean, He is G Dragon rapper/producer/composer/king of fashion and I'm just Lee Yun Mi. The odd girl with only a little talent for singing. Nothing special.

"Listen, the paparazzi sent me some pictures of you guys. And in the pictures you're clearly doing...stuff." He added with a calm voice. But his face revealed a little embarrassment

"Stuff?" Ji Yong finally spoke. There wasn't any sign of irritation on his voicee. On the contrary, he looked like he wasn't interested at all. That hurted me even if it shouldn't have.

"You know what I mean, don't make me say it." The president replied, a little annoyed now.

"We.. never did stuff. Ever." I cleared up. At that moment, I could feel my cheeks getting hot just by imagining us doing that kind of stuff.

"These pics say otherwise." The president replied, bringing me out of my daydreams. He put the above-cited pictures on the desk and pushed them forward so we could see them. The pictures showed me and Ji Yong.. kissing. I blushed and frowned as I looked at them, but I knew that something wasn't right. Because we never ever kissed. Not even accidentally, like I sometime dreamt about.

"They're fake." I said looking away from our united pictured faces.

"No dear. They're absolutely real." He said. "These were taken two days ago."

"But we weren't..kissing." I insisted. "It's just the angle that make people believe we are. I'd remember if we had kissed." You can swear that I would have remembered such memorable event.

"Is that true Ji Yong?" The president asked him. But i already knew he would have confirmed it.

"Yes, it's true." He answered as we looked at him. "I was just fixing the lace of her fluffy hat." He added with an absent-minded voice.

"The one she's wearing now?" The president asked, pointing at the hat I had on. I always had it on mostly because it was a gift from Ji Yong.

"Yes." He replied, relaxed. "It always comes out, so I fixed with a nod."

That day. The day paps shot us together. I was returning back from where I had thrown the trash away, and we casually met in front of the back-door. The one YG's artists and staff used the most. We met there, and the annoying lace came out again and fell on the ground. Ji Yong complained for the tenth time about it. He grabbed it from the ground and fixed it with an undestructible nod. While he were doing it, our body got really close. We were so close that I could smell his body scent. And Yes.. It was absolutely intoxicating. He didn't show any trace of annoyance or embarrassment. Nothing. He just fixed it, greeted me and went on his way.

That's when I understood that he felt absolutely nothing towards me. I was just a friend to him. I'm still trying to convince my heart of that fact so it would have stopped sinking.

"Hmm. I get it." The president nodded. "Then there's really