Frerard, Charlotte Taylor [best ereader for pc .TXT] 📗
- Author: Charlotte Taylor
Book online «Frerard, Charlotte Taylor [best ereader for pc .TXT] 📗». Author Charlotte Taylor
love you a lot. hopefully he hasn't been drinking.
Ever since Jake he had turned to drink, and only helped other, if i could kill without the prison bit, i would kill Jake. He hurt Gerd, more ways than others, and fucked his life up so bad.
I felt bad about being so harsh on Frank for liking Gerd, maybe i should talk to him....
Gerard~
I woke up to aching ribs and a hangover, fucking great.
I sat up slowly, hair fell over my face in a tangled mess, headphones tangled, fallen onto the floor.The cold pierced my skin like a thousand cold pins. Also my phone was on my leg... my phone?.... OH SHIT! i tumbled up and grabbed a pair of pants that i took off in the night and got a jumper, shoved it on and picked up my phone, remembering the call with Frank.
I had cried then dad came in and yelled, he hit me and then i got the booze, then i remembered how i remembered how i dropped my phone and Frank was still there i told him... i said i loved him! SHIT!!!! i hoped about, putting on some black skinny jeans then grabbing my phone and heading to the kitchen. The house was silent, i looked at the clock, 6 am, at least dad had gone to work.
I slowly dialed the number, hesitating, then talking myself back into it.
I held the phone inbetween my shoulder and my ear as i put the kettle on and sat on the kitchen chairs.
'Hello.' a lazy worn out voice asked.
'Frank, its Gerd- Gerard.' i corrected myself
'Oh hey Gee!' he said cheerly.
'Hi, i wanted to sy sorry for last night and-.'
'Its okay Gee, just, can you tell me what happened? in between the 'thank you' and the drunken 'i love you's' please.' He chewed on something at the end on the plee.
'Come over and we can talk properly, okay?'
'Yeah sure, mom and dad are worried though. About you, and me.' he said slowly.
'Yeah? how so?' i asked curiously. pouring milk into my steaming coffee.
'Well, they cam in the middle of our .... conversation last night, when you went, or whatever they heard me shouting. then they came in my room this morning coz i was crying,don't ask.' he added.
'Ahhh, sorry, just tell them i was ill or something...' i suggested adding, way to much, sugar to my milky coffee.
'Nar, they'll never let go of it dude, there extremely protective argh!' he gasped. i dropped my spoon 'Whats up?!?' i aksed ugently.
'I'll tell you later.'
'Okay, see you soon.'
'Bye Gee.'
a whisper in my head sweetly said i love you,i shook my head. no! no! not this again. i argued.
'No, not again.' i whispered.
About five minutes later and i herd a knock on the door i opened the door with a smile, his face dragged my breathe out of my mouth giving me butterflies. His face was just so fucking perfect, the black fridge hid one eye, the other shone brightly with happiness. Then i saw a thick bandage on his had, all the way up his arm, yet again he had short sleeves on.
'What the fuck happened?' i asked as he passed me and i closed the door gently.
'Dad was drunk and he was cooking... TOTAL accident.' he added at the look of my face. 'You know my dad, wouldn't hurt a fly, especially me.' he winced as he sat down on the couch.
'Yeah... speak for yourself.' I muttered taking a coffee from him.
He looked confused, obviously he had heard me then. shit.
'Anyway. Last night, i'm really really-'
'Gerard shut up, your my best friend, its fine!' he smiled taking a sip. 'Just please. tell me what happened.' he insisted.
'No one has cared for me like you Frank. I think- i think i meant it last night... when i said .... i love you..' i felt my face burn red as the words slipped my lips.
I groaned at his face, 'Sorry okay! I love you, there i said it, i'm conscious, sober and i love you Frank Iero!'
Frank~
Gerard just said he loves me... he's sober and conscious but i didn't know what to say, i wanted to hug him and kiss him but the urge was stopped by the reality that something had happened to him last night and something was hurting him.
He sat starring into my eyes, smiling widely for a little while.
What the fuck, i mean i know he's gay and everything, am i dreaming or something. This is exactly what i want to hear from Gee.... what was i doing??. shut up!!!
I smiled, 'Gee, your drunk, go back to bed.' i ordered standing up.
'No, look i'm sober!' he cried happily standing up and walking in a straight line.
'Fine then, your fucked in the head!'
'You! You should know that by now Frankie.'
'Frankie?' i asked frowning.
'Yupp, like Frank but longer like your little Frankie.' he said standing close to me sliding his hand down my chest to the line of my boxers.
I grabbed his hand and held it up tightly, 'Gerard you are drunk and horney, now get your ass to bed! I will make coffee.'
'Frankie and bed is what i need.' he nodding walking to his room, tripping slightly.
'Come on then! i need to show you something!' he called, disappearing from view, leaving the door open slightly.
Unwillingly and confused. I followed him.
When i entered his bedroom, i wanted to run out again, Gee was sat on the bed, his head in his hands, there was a strong smell of alcohol and weed to which worried me, Gee drank, but never weed.
'Holy shit, Gee' i whispered, he nodded slowly, not moving his position.
I sat next to him, not a word escaped my lips, i didn't think that was possible, seeing him like this, it tore holes into my heart.
'Ger- erard' i stuttered holding back tears.
'I'm sorry.' a muffled muttered whispered.
'No, I'M sorry, i should have... i should-'
'Not your fault, reality just caught up with me, thats all. Jake...' he whispered lifting his head up slightly, resting it on his folded arms.
'I now its hard to let go of someone you love-'
'NO!' he shouted.
'I USED to love him. but then he- he-' tears slipped down his face as he took of his black zipped hoodie.
'Gee-?' i shuddered as he held out his pale thin arms that he had covered perminatly.
I held out a hand and he lay his arm in my warm hand and he looked away and sobbed.
Bruises and cuts and ink stains covered his arms.
'Gee?- what- i- holy shit!' i gasped as he lifted up his shirt, showing, what seemed like endless browny blue covering his skinny white body.
My heart melted, my head went fuzzy, Gee's hazel eyes turned back at me, with Tear stained cheeks and water flooded eyes, starred back at me. Like he was searching for words like he had always known, words of hate, fists of fury. I slipped my arms around his body.
One warm tear slid down my cheek as i tried my best to stop myself for bursting into tears and losing control.
'Gerard.' I whispered. 'He will NEVER hurt you again, i'll never let anyone hurt you, i promise.'
More tears slid down my face as he turned his head towards me, turning his body so i was sat on his lap, arms still rapped around him.
'Frank. I've never showed- .. i didn't want to be a burden, but i know you'll understand now, you can't stay here, i'm dangerous, bad things happen to the people i love, all the time and-'
'No! Gerard, i'm staying! Look at you, this Jake bastard HURT you, and i'm here to prot-'
'Not just Jake though is it?!?' he screamed, standing up, covering his bruised body up with his hoodie again.
'What do you mean?!?' i yelled back, tears rolled fericly down my face.
'Dad...' he croaked, sitting back down.
'No!' i yelled suddenly, no no no no no no his dad.... his DAD for fuck sake!!!!!!
Gee stood up and grabbed my arm as i headed for the door.
'Frank, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!'
'You need someone to HELP you Gerard!!!' I yelled sitting down on the edge of the bed, head in my hands. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!!!!!!
He looked so fragile, tangled, black hair sticking to his face with tears, running eyeliner and bruised arms exposed.
He bent down, looking up at my face hands on my knees.
'Hey. I'm sorry for this..' he gestured to his arms and to my tears and smiled.
'Sorry, just. had to tell someone, you know.'
i whiped my eyes a little
'Come on,' he said throwing a pair of trousers at my head, 'school' he said.
'School?!? No! hell no, your coming home with me and we're going to talk and get you sorted out.' i stood up, wipping my eyes and standing up. I helped him up.
'But, school...'
'Nope.' i said turning to his desk.
'Make up time... Mikey.' i whispered gesturing to the closed door.
About half an hour later, after me falling of the bed five times and Gee attacking me with red eyeliner, we were ready. our usual dark eyes and white faces pasted on and a smile stretched from ear to ear and we were out the door.
Lots of people starred, they always did, 'freaks got a friend' they probably said.... more than a friend to me....
Gerard~
Frank took me to his place, the house was just around the corner from our's it was a little bigger than our's even though it was just him, his mom and dad. two guitars leaded against a stand, one smaller than the other, the smaller one was a glossy white with shimmering letters that spelt out 'PANSY' either, it was a bad joke or the name for this magnificate instrement.
Frank chucked his hoodie onto the leather couch up against the wall opposite a big TV. He flicked it on and put it on mute.
'Sit' he ordered sitting on the left of the couch with his legs crossed.
I sat opposite him, legs crossed and arms crossed.
'I'm fine Frank, trust me.'
'Trust me, your not. Gerard, you may be strong and you may help yourself every night when your alone and afriad, but this time, you have help. You can keep on picking yourself back up, but one day the loniness with eat you up.'
Frank said confidently looking right into my eyes.
My eyes burnt and so did my chest.
Frank's eyes filled with tears too and pulled me into a hug. He held me tightly, his body heat warming me up from the cool vides of his house; tears spilled down my face and i sobbed into his shoulder, clinging onto his t-shirt.
i closed my eyes and tried to stop myself but it just made it worse, i wanted to be strong like i always am, but with Frank... its different, its like i feel safe and loved instead of having to pretend i'm ok all the time. and i wanted him to tell him this but i sobbed harder and harder with every breathe i took.
Frank~
Gerard was holding onto my shirt, sobbing hard into my shoulder muttering and mubbling to his himself making his sobs louder and longer.
I wanted to take all the pain away, the nasty thoughts, the horrible past and give him a future he'll remember for all the right reason, tears slid silently
Ever since Jake he had turned to drink, and only helped other, if i could kill without the prison bit, i would kill Jake. He hurt Gerd, more ways than others, and fucked his life up so bad.
I felt bad about being so harsh on Frank for liking Gerd, maybe i should talk to him....
Gerard~
I woke up to aching ribs and a hangover, fucking great.
I sat up slowly, hair fell over my face in a tangled mess, headphones tangled, fallen onto the floor.The cold pierced my skin like a thousand cold pins. Also my phone was on my leg... my phone?.... OH SHIT! i tumbled up and grabbed a pair of pants that i took off in the night and got a jumper, shoved it on and picked up my phone, remembering the call with Frank.
I had cried then dad came in and yelled, he hit me and then i got the booze, then i remembered how i remembered how i dropped my phone and Frank was still there i told him... i said i loved him! SHIT!!!! i hoped about, putting on some black skinny jeans then grabbing my phone and heading to the kitchen. The house was silent, i looked at the clock, 6 am, at least dad had gone to work.
I slowly dialed the number, hesitating, then talking myself back into it.
I held the phone inbetween my shoulder and my ear as i put the kettle on and sat on the kitchen chairs.
'Hello.' a lazy worn out voice asked.
'Frank, its Gerd- Gerard.' i corrected myself
'Oh hey Gee!' he said cheerly.
'Hi, i wanted to sy sorry for last night and-.'
'Its okay Gee, just, can you tell me what happened? in between the 'thank you' and the drunken 'i love you's' please.' He chewed on something at the end on the plee.
'Come over and we can talk properly, okay?'
'Yeah sure, mom and dad are worried though. About you, and me.' he said slowly.
'Yeah? how so?' i asked curiously. pouring milk into my steaming coffee.
'Well, they cam in the middle of our .... conversation last night, when you went, or whatever they heard me shouting. then they came in my room this morning coz i was crying,don't ask.' he added.
'Ahhh, sorry, just tell them i was ill or something...' i suggested adding, way to much, sugar to my milky coffee.
'Nar, they'll never let go of it dude, there extremely protective argh!' he gasped. i dropped my spoon 'Whats up?!?' i aksed ugently.
'I'll tell you later.'
'Okay, see you soon.'
'Bye Gee.'
a whisper in my head sweetly said i love you,i shook my head. no! no! not this again. i argued.
'No, not again.' i whispered.
About five minutes later and i herd a knock on the door i opened the door with a smile, his face dragged my breathe out of my mouth giving me butterflies. His face was just so fucking perfect, the black fridge hid one eye, the other shone brightly with happiness. Then i saw a thick bandage on his had, all the way up his arm, yet again he had short sleeves on.
'What the fuck happened?' i asked as he passed me and i closed the door gently.
'Dad was drunk and he was cooking... TOTAL accident.' he added at the look of my face. 'You know my dad, wouldn't hurt a fly, especially me.' he winced as he sat down on the couch.
'Yeah... speak for yourself.' I muttered taking a coffee from him.
He looked confused, obviously he had heard me then. shit.
'Anyway. Last night, i'm really really-'
'Gerard shut up, your my best friend, its fine!' he smiled taking a sip. 'Just please. tell me what happened.' he insisted.
'No one has cared for me like you Frank. I think- i think i meant it last night... when i said .... i love you..' i felt my face burn red as the words slipped my lips.
I groaned at his face, 'Sorry okay! I love you, there i said it, i'm conscious, sober and i love you Frank Iero!'
Frank~
Gerard just said he loves me... he's sober and conscious but i didn't know what to say, i wanted to hug him and kiss him but the urge was stopped by the reality that something had happened to him last night and something was hurting him.
He sat starring into my eyes, smiling widely for a little while.
What the fuck, i mean i know he's gay and everything, am i dreaming or something. This is exactly what i want to hear from Gee.... what was i doing??. shut up!!!
I smiled, 'Gee, your drunk, go back to bed.' i ordered standing up.
'No, look i'm sober!' he cried happily standing up and walking in a straight line.
'Fine then, your fucked in the head!'
'You! You should know that by now Frankie.'
'Frankie?' i asked frowning.
'Yupp, like Frank but longer like your little Frankie.' he said standing close to me sliding his hand down my chest to the line of my boxers.
I grabbed his hand and held it up tightly, 'Gerard you are drunk and horney, now get your ass to bed! I will make coffee.'
'Frankie and bed is what i need.' he nodding walking to his room, tripping slightly.
'Come on then! i need to show you something!' he called, disappearing from view, leaving the door open slightly.
Unwillingly and confused. I followed him.
When i entered his bedroom, i wanted to run out again, Gee was sat on the bed, his head in his hands, there was a strong smell of alcohol and weed to which worried me, Gee drank, but never weed.
'Holy shit, Gee' i whispered, he nodded slowly, not moving his position.
I sat next to him, not a word escaped my lips, i didn't think that was possible, seeing him like this, it tore holes into my heart.
'Ger- erard' i stuttered holding back tears.
'I'm sorry.' a muffled muttered whispered.
'No, I'M sorry, i should have... i should-'
'Not your fault, reality just caught up with me, thats all. Jake...' he whispered lifting his head up slightly, resting it on his folded arms.
'I now its hard to let go of someone you love-'
'NO!' he shouted.
'I USED to love him. but then he- he-' tears slipped down his face as he took of his black zipped hoodie.
'Gee-?' i shuddered as he held out his pale thin arms that he had covered perminatly.
I held out a hand and he lay his arm in my warm hand and he looked away and sobbed.
Bruises and cuts and ink stains covered his arms.
'Gee?- what- i- holy shit!' i gasped as he lifted up his shirt, showing, what seemed like endless browny blue covering his skinny white body.
My heart melted, my head went fuzzy, Gee's hazel eyes turned back at me, with Tear stained cheeks and water flooded eyes, starred back at me. Like he was searching for words like he had always known, words of hate, fists of fury. I slipped my arms around his body.
One warm tear slid down my cheek as i tried my best to stop myself for bursting into tears and losing control.
'Gerard.' I whispered. 'He will NEVER hurt you again, i'll never let anyone hurt you, i promise.'
More tears slid down my face as he turned his head towards me, turning his body so i was sat on his lap, arms still rapped around him.
'Frank. I've never showed- .. i didn't want to be a burden, but i know you'll understand now, you can't stay here, i'm dangerous, bad things happen to the people i love, all the time and-'
'No! Gerard, i'm staying! Look at you, this Jake bastard HURT you, and i'm here to prot-'
'Not just Jake though is it?!?' he screamed, standing up, covering his bruised body up with his hoodie again.
'What do you mean?!?' i yelled back, tears rolled fericly down my face.
'Dad...' he croaked, sitting back down.
'No!' i yelled suddenly, no no no no no no his dad.... his DAD for fuck sake!!!!!!
Gee stood up and grabbed my arm as i headed for the door.
'Frank, WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING!'
'You need someone to HELP you Gerard!!!' I yelled sitting down on the edge of the bed, head in my hands. fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!!!!!!
He looked so fragile, tangled, black hair sticking to his face with tears, running eyeliner and bruised arms exposed.
He bent down, looking up at my face hands on my knees.
'Hey. I'm sorry for this..' he gestured to his arms and to my tears and smiled.
'Sorry, just. had to tell someone, you know.'
i whiped my eyes a little
'Come on,' he said throwing a pair of trousers at my head, 'school' he said.
'School?!? No! hell no, your coming home with me and we're going to talk and get you sorted out.' i stood up, wipping my eyes and standing up. I helped him up.
'But, school...'
'Nope.' i said turning to his desk.
'Make up time... Mikey.' i whispered gesturing to the closed door.
About half an hour later, after me falling of the bed five times and Gee attacking me with red eyeliner, we were ready. our usual dark eyes and white faces pasted on and a smile stretched from ear to ear and we were out the door.
Lots of people starred, they always did, 'freaks got a friend' they probably said.... more than a friend to me....
Gerard~
Frank took me to his place, the house was just around the corner from our's it was a little bigger than our's even though it was just him, his mom and dad. two guitars leaded against a stand, one smaller than the other, the smaller one was a glossy white with shimmering letters that spelt out 'PANSY' either, it was a bad joke or the name for this magnificate instrement.
Frank chucked his hoodie onto the leather couch up against the wall opposite a big TV. He flicked it on and put it on mute.
'Sit' he ordered sitting on the left of the couch with his legs crossed.
I sat opposite him, legs crossed and arms crossed.
'I'm fine Frank, trust me.'
'Trust me, your not. Gerard, you may be strong and you may help yourself every night when your alone and afriad, but this time, you have help. You can keep on picking yourself back up, but one day the loniness with eat you up.'
Frank said confidently looking right into my eyes.
My eyes burnt and so did my chest.
Frank's eyes filled with tears too and pulled me into a hug. He held me tightly, his body heat warming me up from the cool vides of his house; tears spilled down my face and i sobbed into his shoulder, clinging onto his t-shirt.
i closed my eyes and tried to stop myself but it just made it worse, i wanted to be strong like i always am, but with Frank... its different, its like i feel safe and loved instead of having to pretend i'm ok all the time. and i wanted him to tell him this but i sobbed harder and harder with every breathe i took.
Frank~
Gerard was holding onto my shirt, sobbing hard into my shoulder muttering and mubbling to his himself making his sobs louder and longer.
I wanted to take all the pain away, the nasty thoughts, the horrible past and give him a future he'll remember for all the right reason, tears slid silently
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