Memories, Laura Martin [an ebook reader TXT] 📗

Memories are made of smiles and tears. When I lost my husband , the hardest anniversaries were the unexpected ones. This is a time that is a let down time anyway for me. Now it was a reminder of loss. My husband would never be there to make new resolutions or new plans together for the year ahead.
We had enjoyed some sports very often and it shocked me how hard it was to do an old familiar thing without my husband. I stood at the top of the slope and cried.
My pain was fresh and that made it overwhelming to me. It even hurt physically. My body ached with it. Other people seemed to deal with loss better than I. Do I not have faith? Why doesn’t God seem close like He did before?
One moment I felt that I had gotten through the pain fairly well and life had resumed again. I missed my loved one, but all was going fairly well. Then suddenly, I plunged into tears or anger, because life wasn’t the way it was before and I missed the comfort and joy of the old way.
As time goes on for me, instead of so much pain, I’ve been able to hold my memories close and savor them as moments of love. I have been able to thank God for these anniversaries, because they remind me that I have loved and have been loved by my beloved husband.
How on earth do you move on? Is there some magic way to do or be? If you follow all the steps, will it help?I searched for an easy answer and of course there is none. I tried a support group, counseling, silent retreats, travel, working harder… These can help, but none was a permanent solution. It’s just that grief is hard. It takes more time than you want it to. But steadily, over time, if you do the grief work, more peace will come.God can comfort because He understands grief. And He knows what wonders lay beyond this world. Receive strength from His Love.
I realize the fragileness of life. I spend less time stressing over things that won’t matter in a year or two. I tell my friends and family that I love them more often and I tell them why I appreciate them.
I try to listen deeply to what people are saying instead of thinking what to say next.Later the friends who were afraid of my pain could handle me when I was on the way to healing.

Publication Date: 03-01-2010

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