I wish you knew what I feel, Ashley Goldsmith [books to read as a couple TXT] 📗

There i sat.
Waiting patiently for it.Emotionless.I couldn't comprehend what it is i wanted.From the outside looking in i was a pretty girl who had everyting going for her.From the inside looking out i was practically hoping for death.
Everything was dead and had no meaning.My life was in the dumps and nobody understood it.Everybody thought i wanted what they were giving to me.But the truth is they were basically trying to shove crap down my throat.I wanted nothing to more than toget out of this town and this life.Everybody thought i had it made.They thought i had a great boyfriend and loving parents.
But they were wrong.My boyfriend was not only cheating on me but he was cheating on me with my best friend.My parents wanted nothing to do with me.They thought it would be best if they left me alone.
So now i sit here waiting for the vodka to kick in so i wouldn't feel anything.After it kicks in i'll take all these pills in my sweating palm.I feel a little woozy bu it will go away soon.I can't really feel my body anymore.Hum,i wonder if i took some pills before drinking the vodka.

Now i can't really feel anything.I hear screaming.Its coming from my mom.Hi mom.I'm not sorry.
You should have cared more.Maybe than i'd still be here.Now shes laying by my lifeless body.Ican see her crying.She has called my dad and the hospital.They can't save me now.
Ican't see her anymore and i think i'm floating up.So i'll say my final goodbye.Hope you know i quit feeling a long time ago.
Even before you still cared.Ican see a light and i don't feel any pain.I guess this is were i'm supposed to be.

Publication Date: 12-28-2011

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