Alone, She Sits, Teresa Cervantes [red seas under red skies .TXT] 📗

She began to notice every event in her life while she sat alone in the open space. She questioned her life, her existence, her future, her past and present. It wasn't easy, she was quite successful. You see, she had a great family, she had 3 sibilings, 2 loveable parents, 3 dogs, her best friend, but she still wasn't happy. She wanted more! She wanted to be able to let go of the events that kept her stuck at the bottom. She didn't know how. They never taught her that. 

Sarah, was the women's name. She was full of life, but at the same time dead inside. You may know her. She lived within everyone, your neighbor, you family, and even you. But that didnt stop her from turning her  life upside down. Soon she would take advantage of the life she always wanted but she didn't know how. 

Sarah was an average girl. She had friends, she was pretty but not popular. She was great in school, always listened to her parents, had the best friends ever or she thought. She had her own group, but she always felt like an outcast. You see, she wasn't skinny, she was fairly big, had boobs, a little butt but never beautiful. Growing up she never had a boyfriend, she was always living in the shadows of her friends. Her friends were beautiful, skinny, prefect teeth, everyone wanted to be friends with them, always had the best clothes. However, Sarah was always thankful for what her parents gave her. She had a roof on top of her head, food on the table, and clothes to wear. Everything she needed. But happiness was far from having. 

Anyways, Sarah always tried to be there for everyone and she was. When one of her friends was sad, broken, or justed wanted to talk boy stuff, she was there. But nobody was there when Sarah needed them. She was quite the friend but her friends never paid attention. She grew being the outcast but a shadow. She never knew if she was good enough, she was never perfect. She knew she couldn't let go of anyone, they were her friends. What would she do without them? 

Soon, high school would be over, she was 18, with the same group of friends she grew up with. She had 6 true friends who had ups and downs, like the quote says, "A circle has no ends, that how long I want to be your friend." She knew what the phrase meant but that meant lots of sacrifice. You see, she had decided to go into a university locally and was the best decision ever. She met great people, clubs/ organizations and everything. It's fun!  

She kept a strong connection with Victoria, they talk to each other everyday, talking about the kids and life in general. During high school, towards our senior year, Victoria became pregnant, she was blessed with a little boy. He's going to be 4 years old this coming October. She's super excited, he'll start preschool soon. Yayyy! Meantime, victoria had 2 kids overall, a boy and a girl. The girl is about to be 1 in August. It was tough for Sarah, her friendship took a turn. It was no more, "Hey, let's hang out tonight," now it was more like, "how are the kids, can I go and visit." Life was great you know, Sarah was like an aunt for them. But she has to move on. 

 She sat alone, in the room, trying to continue the life she was given. Lots of ups and downs, but she was grateful. She learned from her mistakes, well sometimes. Soon enough, Sarah grew up, she became very interested in so much. She now wanted to experience everything. 

She sat alone in the room that would be her only get away. She would run errands, once she got home she would go to her room. Sarah had the room to herself for the evening, she took advantage of it. Being alone help her think about everything. How the semester was going to go, how the family was, how she can change,or what she could change. It wasnt easy, even though she couldn't work because she was taking her parents every where, it was tough.

Sarah's life was staying at home. She would wake up early in the morning and get ready for work. She would come back home and stay in all day. Depending if she didn't have any doctor appointments for her dad or herself. She was able to maintain herself busy before she had to pick up her dad from work but nothing to extreme, like mentioned before, Sarah had errand to run sometimes. 

She would always do the things that needed to be done without hesitation. She knew if she didn't do them who would? It was something she hated because nobody would help her. Sarah's mom would get tired of being in the house too. For some time her mom was going out of the country. She had to go to her hometown and take care of her parents. Sarah was happy that her mom could help out by going but Sarah was tired. Mentally and physically drained. Her brothers didn't understand that, they wouldn't help out at home so they were a lost caused. She couldn't count on them, only her dad. Her dad sometimes was hard on her but he was the only one there. 

Sarah would always go to her room and sit in the dark space just thinking, reading, drawing, or on social media. She didn't have nothing else to do, nobody would message her, talk to her, or even hang out with her. She would only sit there wondering and seeing what everyone was up too. The family wasn't financially satabled, so they didn't go out much, very rare when they would. Sarah didn't mind, she would be comfortable at home, nothing very big did she like. 

Even though life had taught her numerous lessons, she didn't understand why things happened to her family or her. They went through a lot of things in the past years. They had lots of things happen during those years. Everyone around us knew our struggle but it was the least people you thought of who helped. She sat alone reminiscing about lots of things, but she learned that life goes on. When she least expects it, she will have a moment of relief. Sarah will be able to smile in the dark with pleasure that everything will be okay. Sooner or later, Sarah will have to come out from the dark into the shine and show who she really is. Sarah no longer cares who left her life only those who stayed. Sarah is happy, before she wasn't but she over came the pain she was living with a smile from someone she no longer talks too. We all want a fairytale, but the sun doesn't shine without a little rain. 

Publication Date: 08-01-2018

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