Big Gurl, Xicano Sol [snow like ashes txt] 📗

He wasn’t obese, but love handles don’t warrant much love in a community where image is everything. His circle of friends affectionately called him “Big Gurl” because he was the most overweight of their group. Others often questioned him if hanging out with his circle of friends was difficult because they all happened to be very thin, muscular men. His answer was always the same, “No, I’m secure with who I am and don’t worry I get mine.” But there was a look in his eye that didn’t quite convey authenticity.

I asked if he thought it was by chance that his friends had a certain body type. He answered, “I don’t know, I just know that I like the attention ‘we’ get whenever we’re together. I don’t get that type of attention when I’m alone.” I asked if he thought that dynamic would ever change and he quickly answered, “Yes. I’ve lost 20 lbs already and I’m going to lose more. One day the shoes are going to be on the other foot and while they’re all considered tired and played out, it will be my turn to shine. Then they’ll know how I felt all these years.”

Publication Date: 11-22-2011

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