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Later there was Michael's basketball game. Today we were going against our arch rivals, the Mountain Goats. l soon heard shouts of "Goats!!!" "Devils!!!". Nina leaned over. "This is a big game for Micheal, so be happy for him." she whispered. l saw Sophia not too far away. She was wearing jeans and a T-shirt that said Led Zeppelin. On her feet were cheetah flats. l really liked her green eye shadow. She had a giraffe purse close. She was also sipping coffee and talking to Billy. She saw me and smiled. l smiled back. "What's up?" l asked Nina. She looked at me. l pointed at Sophia. "They're boyfriend and girlfriend." Then time stopped completely. l saw a huge guy wider than he was tall trying to block Michael's shot. l looked at Logan. His hair was standing up. But that didn't matter. My heart was pounding, my breath was short, and my stomach kept flipping. Tears welled in my eyes. l heard a pretty female voice. "Tobias, are you okay?" "Yeah." A female handed me a tissue. l wiped my eyes with it. "Dude, are you sure you're okay?" A red haired male. The male and female looked at each other. l totally ignored them. At that time, l couldn't recognize anybody. Not Logan. Not Sophia. Not myself.


l saw Micheal and Nina afterwards. We had won the game, but l felt depressed. "Nina, l need to talk to you." Micheal said. He pulled her to a spot where nobody could eavesdrop. She smiled after he said something. She literally grinned from ear to ear. "Wow," Logan said. l knew what he meant.

`Later,there was a dance. Micheal had put on a flannel shirt and was dancing with Nina. I didn't dance, but l saw Sophia dancing. She was a fantastic dancer. She reminded me of a mixture between Lady Gaga and Abba. Her moves were not quite as sexy as Lady Gaga's, but still good.


My belly rolls seemed to have gotten bigger. This is impossible, l thought. When l stood up, my stomach hung over almost ten inches. l knocked on Tony's door. " Come in," he said. l walked in. Tony was lying on his stomach and watching wrestling. "Whassup Sqiurt?" "Have you ever felt that you can't be with a girl but you're chunky and a dork at the same time?" He cocked his head. "l've had dorks have crushes on me, but l've never felt too chubby or dorky enough not to be with a girl. Actually l can't remember the last time l've felt truly dorky. Why?" "Just wondering." l lied. Tony smirked. "Sit down. This black guy's really nailing this Puerto Rican guy." Tony wasn't kidding. He really was. He actually won the round. Tony reached into a big bag of salt and vinegar chips. Then he gulped down a can of Coca-Cola. His floor looked he hadn't vacuumed it in years. After the show Tony turned it to Criminal Minds. "Ooh, looks like a couple of guys got into a bloody chick fight." l totally agreed with him. "Where's Mom and Dad?" "Dad got a job at the Burger King on Gage. Mom took a client to a nice restaurant." That meant they'd both be gone for a while. My belly rumbled.

The next day l walked up to Nina. Nina has a locker that's pink on the inside. "Hey," she said without turning around. "I've got a bunch of news. Pop quiz in science and math both. Here's the answers to a homework thingy." The reason why she said "homework thingy" was because Mr. Reed was walking right by us. He glanced at us.
"Anyway, here's the answers." "Come on Nina. You know l don't cheat. Wait, how'd you know? And how did you get the answers?" Silly question. We have a professional hacker in our school. He or she calls himherself The Beauty. A lot of people think it's a girl because of the name. But the work is done so messily and carelessly that a girl couldn't possibly be the hacker. Nina raised her perfect eyebrows. Why didn't l see how brown and sparkley her eyes really are? "You need to loosen up, Mr.Levelheaded. And there's going to be a party at Maureen's place. About seven. Everyone's invited. Friday." "But l don't know where she lives." "West forty eight second street. Big pink Victorian house. Blue rosebushes. Good looking place. Think about it."


"Sounds like Nina wants you to go." Mom said. "And she is your friend." "But, Mom, Maureen is the most popular girl in school." "Speaking of popular girls, Mom, remember that Sara Nerdatron and Delilah Prettie are coming over." "Tony, that's not nice." "l'm serious Mom, that's their last names. Oh yeah, and Sandy Slut is coming over." "Tony!" Then the doorbell rang. l opened it. Three girls were standing there. There was a girl that reminded me of Maureen, a girl wearing slacks and a polo shirt, and a girl wearing provacative clothing. l could see that she had pasties under her shirt. Okay, l do not need to see that. l also knew that Mom would flip as soon as she saw her. "My name's Sandy Slut," the third girl said. She was wearing a tight tank top, a skirt four inches long, and gladiator high heels. She wore lots of blue and black eye shadow. She also had curly blond hair. All of them had blond hair. The girl that looked like Maureen could definitely be her sister. " l'm Sara Nerdatron." the second one said. l glanced at Tony. He gave Mom a smug smile. Mom rolled her eyes. "Okay, you were right." "Wow Tony. You have the cutest cousin." Sandy said. "He's my little brother." "Oh." "His name is Tobias." "Cool. What's it mean?" Tony looked at Mom. Mom shrugged. "We don't know." "So Tony, " Sandy said, inching forward. She played with Tony's bangs. "You want to go on a date." Tony flashed a big smile. And it was real. "l have a girlfriend. Spring Garcia." "Spring Garcia!" Sandy stepped back. She looked like she'd just seen an alien. Maureen number two smiled. "Spring Garcia is really sweet and funny. And she is so real. She was even real when that hot guy from New York came by." "l'll tell her you said that, Kelsy." l glanced at Mom. She looked at me. We were both surprised. Most of Tony's relationships never lasted as long as this. Had Tony found The One? Was he truly in love? l went upstairs. Thoughts of Sophia clouded my mind. l thought about it. l'd secretly been thinking about it for days. Get it over with, you chubby fool! l reached into my dresser drawer, pulled out a pocket knife l had gotten years ago, and slit my wrist. It was the first time. lt didn't hurt.


All l knew was that l loved Sophia, but she belonged to someone else. She belonged to my enemy. I need to work on my flirting anyway, l reminded myself. l'd ask Nina for help with that. l opened my locker, grabbed my math textbook and shut the locker. l turned around. Billy was standing right there with a big grin on his face. "l know your secret," he said. Then he drew back his fist. "Billy!" l turned around. My science teacher was right behind Billy with his arms folded. "You weren't going to hurt him, were you?" he asked. But of course he knew the answer. Billy knew that he knew. Mr. Reed knew that he knew he knew. And l knew that both of them knew. "Of course not!" Billy cried. "Strange, l've seen you hit him more than anything else." l walked toward the math wing. l heard Mr.Reed lecturing Billy.

After math l walked up to Maureen's locker. "Hey, are you coming to my party?" she asked. "l'm considering it." "Cool. What's up?" l felt butterflies in my belly. Maureen is the most popular girl l know other than my cousin Jasmine. "Uh... how do you impress a girl you're madly in love with?" Maureen smiled. "Does she have a boyfriend?" "Yes." "Then there's not much you can do. If you flirt boldly, you risk making him jealous. If you ask her out, unless she's a hooker, you risk making her anxious. The best thing to do right now is smile and be nice to her. Flirt subtly. Kind of like applying makeup. It can be tricky at first, but you get better the more you do it." She applied a little eyeshadow and walked off. l wrote down everything she said except the makeup part. But how do l flirt? l decided to talk to Tony. "Yo, little bro," he cooed as l climbed into his car. "Tony?" "Yo?" "How do you flirt?" He chattered about the 200 flirt lines he knows. "Mom and Dad are going to be late tonight, so l'll stop at Mickey D's." l didn't really want anything, but Tony ordered for me anyway. "Hey, l have to feed my little baby brother. He'll be hungry without food." He tousled my hair.


l let Girlfriend in. But it wasn't just her. A queensland heeler followed her. "That's Jazz." Tony said. "Mom had him checked for a microchip. Nothing. So she adopted him." "What does Dad think of him?" "He's like 'He's just there'. But Mom fell in love with him. She's schudeled an appointment with a local groomer. What do you think?" "l think he's brilliant." It was the truth. l loved him. l went upstairs and lay on my bed. l read a book. Thirty minutes later, l heard shouting. l put the book down and went downstairs. Mom sat at the dining room table. She turned toward me. "Tobias, sweetheart, go back upstairs and take Girlfriend and Jazz with you." l obeyed her. l heard more shouting and slamming. l went to bed around nine o' clock. The next day was grim. Tony and Dad didn't even look at each other. When Tony went to his room l decided to follow him. l don't know what possessed me to do so. He came out with a jacket. We ate breakfast. Tony drove me to school. l watched Sophia closely. She and Billy were definitely dating.


Okay, so l decided to go to Maureen's party. Maureen opened the door. " Hi Tobias! Glad you came." She smelled like fresh lavender, and looked beautiful. l loved the hot pink lipstick. "You look lovely." l managed to say. She beamed. "So l heard you got a new puppy." "Sort of. His name is Jazz." "So is he much trouble?" She batted her eyelashes. "He needs to be house trained." Ain't that the truth! My new cell phone rang. Mom had bought it the night before. l looked at it. Michael. 'Yo dude. Sup?' 'lm at Maureen's party.' 'Oh. Have fun.' "Whassup?" Maureen asked. "He wondered what l was doing." "That's cool. Hey, l need some help in science. Can l get your number?" "Sure." l love science and social sciences, and l wanted to get popular and skinny and impress Sophia. l soon saw this girl named Chloe. Chloe has long brown hair that she's always dying to match her current crush's hair. Today it was dirty blond, like my hair. She wore a purple low cut tank top and and miniskirt. She also wore high heels and was shaking her head and dancing wildly. She' s also kind of tall. Maureen sighed. "l don't know why l bothered. You really can't trust her. And Mum would have a heart attack if she met her." l nodded in agreement. Chloe is kind of crazy and inapproriate. l've seen her cuss multiple times. l know almost
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