The Castrator, Atanas Marinov, Atanas Marinov, Atanas Marinov, Atanas Marinov [free romance novels .TXT] 📗

REALITY CHANGED. THE SUBTLE POINT IN CALCULATIONS OF ANY ORDER WAS TO TAKE MORE SIGNIFICANT PERIODS OF TIME - IT WAS RATHER POINTLESS TO CHANGE THE MAGICIAN'S PERCEPTIONS IN JUST A FEW SECONDS, WHICH WOULD LATER BE BURDENED BY THE ALTERED PERCEPTION, TIME CHANGED SUBJECTIVELY, AND HENCEFORTH THEIR CHANGE IN THE FUTURE WOULD BE EVEN MORE COMPLICATED. YES, THE MAGICIAN COULD ALSO LIFT A FEW SECONDS AND MAKE A FULL RESTORATION OF EVENTS, BUT THE PARADOX AND FATE BROUGHT ABOUT BY HIS INTERVENTION COULD MAKE THAT TASK MORE DIFFICULT AND CAUSE UNPREDICTABLE RESULTS IN THE FUTURE, AND THAT CARRIED RISKS. THE ULTIMATE MASTERY IN THE USE OF TIME MAGIC, AS OF ANY OTHER MAGIC, WAS THE COMBINATION OF THE TWO - AND WHILE THIS SOUNDED TOO SIMPLE IN THEORY, IN PRACTICE IT WAS A MATTER OF LIFE AND DEATH, AND VERY OFTEN ONE HAD TO ACT BLINDLY WITH THE KNOWLEDGE AND SKILLS AT ONE'S DISPOSAL, AND ALSO WITH THE PARTICULAR SITUATION ALREADY BURDENED BY MAGICAL MANIPULATIONS. THE MAGICIAN WORE A SENSE OF DÉJÀ VU QUITE OFTEN PRECISELY BECAUSE OF EVERYTHING DESCRIBED ABOVE, AND THE PEOPLE AROUND HIM FELT THAT THE MOMENT ITSELF WAS AS IF PAST, PRESENT AND FUTURE WERE COMING TOGETHER AT ONE POINT. MOREOVER, THE IDEA OF A SO-CALLED LINEAR FLOW WAS A VERY ONE-SIDED PERCEPTION OF THE CRAZY UNIVERSE, SINCE EVEN THOSE WHO WERE PROPONENTS OF THIS IDEA COULD NOT DENY THE FACT THAT THE CORRESPONDING EDDIES, STREAMS AND BRANCHES OF THE FLOW WERE MUCH MORE NUMEROUS AND VARIABLE THAN EVEN THE WILDEST HUMAN IMAGINATION WAS CAPABLE OF ASSUMING THEM TO BE. AFTER ALL, IT ALL BEGAN WITH THE AWARENESS OF THE MEANING OF THE MAIN STREAM, AND SUBSEQUENTLY THE UPPER LEVEL OF MANIPULATION WAS THE TRANSFER OF IT TO THE OTHERS. IN A MORE COMPLEX REALITY, A TRULY SKILLED MAGICIAN COULD DIVIDE TIME INTO SEVERAL TIME STREAMS AND EXERT A SPECIFIC DEGREE OF MANIPULATION, BUT THIS WAS ALSO EXTREMELY DANGEROUS AND NOT AT ALL ADVISABLE. SOME OF THE HIGHER MAGES WERE ABLE TO DROP A SO-CALLED TIME-SPACE THREAD FOR THEMSELVES THAT WOULD HELP THEM TRAVEL INTO THE PAST AND FUTURE PROVIDED THEY HAD DROPPED ANCHOR IN THE PRESENT, BUT TRAVELING INTO THE FUTURE TOOK A CERTAIN RISK, BUT TRAVELING INTO THE PAST WAS CONSIDERABLY MORE DANGEROUS. THE MERE EXPANSION OF SUBJECTIVE TIME TO EVEN JUST A SINGLE TIME STREAM COULD PRODUCE EXTREMELY POWERFUL EFFECTS. IT WAS ALSO POSSIBLE TO CREATE A SO-CALLED "TIME PAUSE" WHERE THE VICTIM WAS LOCKED WITHOUT EVEN NOTICING THE SNEAK ATTACK BY THE ONE WHO HAD CAST THE CORRESPONDING MAGICAL EFFECT. BUT IT WAS THIS SPECIFIC FORM OF MANIPULATION THAT AGENT MORALES WAS EXPERIENCING.

THE FBR INVESTIGATOR WHO WAS IMMERSED IN THIS WORLD FELT LIKE A SCHOOLBOY WHO COULD DO NOTHING BUT TRY TO FLUSH HIMSELF OUT THERE. TO SLIP BETWEEN TEMPORAL AND SPATIAL INTERCONNECTIONS AND FELT AS IF HE WAS BEING SQUEEZED BY SOME VISE, BUT HE WAS SURE HE HAD TO FIND SOME DEFINITE ANSWER OR TO UNDERSTAND THE DESIGN OF WHOEVER HAD PUT HIM INTO THIS PERVERSE AND SELF-CLOSING SCENARIO.

HE WAS ACUTELY AWARE THAT BARNAYNE HAD UNWITTINGLY OR DELIBERATELY CAUGHT HIM IN THIS TIME-SPACE TRAP, AND HE NEEDED TO UNCOVER THE COMPLEX INTERRELATIONSHIPS, AND PERHAPS EVEN CHANGE SOME OF THE EVENTS AS WELL AS THEIR SEQUENCE. BUT THAT WAS WHY A MAGE HAD TO HAVE WHAT WAS CALLED MAGICAL WEIGHT, AND HE WAS THROWN IN LIKE A NEWLY SIGHTED BLIND MAN, AND IT WAS AS IF THE INVISIBLE CHRONOMETER HAD BEEN ACTIVATED - HE WAS TRAPPED IN HIS OWN MIND AND HAD TO TRY TO SURVIVE. HE ALSO REALIZED SOMETHING ELSE - THE MOST IMPORTANT PART OF THE FELISTER'S LEGACY WAS HIS VERY SURVIVAL, AND NOW AGENT MORALES WOULD FEEL THE CIRCLE TIGHTENING AROUND HIM FOR HIMSELF. BUT HOW MUCH TIME WAS THERE?

AT THAT CRITICAL MOMENT, AGENT MORALES' SUBCONSCIOUS KICKED IN - HE WAS LIKE A CAGED TIGER THAT NEEDED TO BREAK FREE. AND EVERY HUMAN SUBCONSCIOUS HAD THE MARVELOUS PROPERTY, UPON PERCEIVING AN IDEA, OF PUTTING IT INTO ACTION IMMEDIATELY, AS IT WORKED BY ASSOCIATION AND UTILIZED EVERY BIT OF KNOWLEDGE THAT HAD BEEN GATHERED BY A PERSON THROUGHOUT HIS LIFE - SO THAT WITHIN HIM WAS LOCKED INFINITE POTENTIAL. THE SUBCONSCIOUS MIND DID NOT ARGUE WITH ITS POSSESSOR, BUT ACCEPTED WHATEVER HE CONSCIOUSLY BELIEVED.

IT OCCURRED TO HIM THAT THE CONDITION IN WHICH THIS UNKNOWN ADVERSARY HAD PLACED HIM WAS QUITE REMINISCENT OF THE LOCKED-IN SYNDROME, WHERE, AFTER CERTAIN TYPES OF DISEASES OF THE CENTRAL NERVOUS SYSTEM AND THE BRAIN, A PERSON WAS UNABLE TO REACT TO EXTERNAL STIMULI AND COULD ONLY MOVE HIS EYES, WHICH WERE HIS ONLY CONNECTION TO THE OUTSIDE WORLD. IF GUIDED BY THIS LOGIC, HE SHOULD HAVE SEEN THE TRUE AND BRUTAL REALITY, NOT THE ONE HE WISHED TO SEE - THE CASE WAS FAR FROM COMPLETE.

FELISTER'S LIMITED TIME WAS NOT AT ALL TO BE UNDERESTIMATED - HE HAD ACHIEVED TOO MUCH AND HAD DEFEATED HIS ENEMIES.

THEN SUDDENLY AGENT MORALES FELT SOMETHING STRANGE - THE PICTURE BEFORE HIS EYES CHANGED AGAIN AND HE SAW ALL THE TORTURED YOUNG REPEAT OFFENDERS, HOMELESS PEOPLE AND ALL SORTS OF OTHER BRUTAL AND PERSPECTIVELESS TYPES, TOSSED ABOUT BY THE WAVES OF LIFE AND WORKING ON FELISTER'S FARM - HE COULD READ THE NOSTALGIC SADNESS IN THEIR EYES FOR A LOST PAST AND A TERRIBLE AND HOPELESS FUTURE - PERHAPS THE ONLY BONUS THEY WERE AFFORDED BY THEIR BRUTAL EMPLOYER WAS THE RIGHT TO SEE THE OCCASIONAL RAY OF SUNSHINE. FAR AWAY IN THE FIELD TO THE WEST HE SAW A HUGE FIELD OF SUNFLOWERS - PROBABLY PART OF THE FARM, WHICH MIGHT HAVE BEEN NECESSARY TO FELISTER, AS SUNFLOWERS WERE USED AS AN INGREDIENT IN THE PIGS' FOOD ALONG WITH RAPE, ALTHOUGH FELISTER HIMSELF HAD SOMETIMES FED THEM HUMAN FLESH AS WELL, AND USUALLY THOSE THUS KILLED DISAPPEARED COMPLETELY WITHOUT A TRACE AS THE PIGS DEVOURED EVERYTHING - EVEN THE BONES OF THE UNFORTUNATE SUFFERERS. FELISTER HAD DONE HIS SUMS WELL, SO AS NOT TO GO TO UNNECESSARY EXPENSE.

AND FOUND THAT ELIZANDER BARNAYNE WAS THE LAST REMNANT OF FELISTER'S INHERITANCE. IT ALL CAME INTO HIS MIND LIKE DÉJÀ VU. HOW STRANGE! AND IF ONE WANTED TO PENETRATE THE MINDS OF OTHERS, ONE'S OWN MIND WOULD HAVE TO BE AWAKE - WITHOUT ANY CRACK!

HE FELT LIKE AN ALIEN IN ANOTHER WORLD! BECAUSE THE PEOPLE WHO HAD CROSSED OVER WOULD ALWAYS LIVE AMONG THE DIFFERENT SCENARIOS OF TEMPORAL REALITY - AND PERHAPS WOULD NEVER BELONG TO ANY OF THEM. AND IF THEY WANTED TO BE HAPPY, THEY HAD TO ACCEPT THAT FACT. MAYBE IT WAS APPROPRIATE FOR THEM TO BE SOMETHING LIKE MEDIATORS, OR TO FIX THIS WHOLE MESS CAUSED BY SO MANY INSANE MAGES MANIPULATING MATTER - AND APPARENTLY NOT IN A VERY MORAL WAY.

AS HE WATCHED ALL THESE SCENES, REVEALING TO HIM VARIOUS STAGES OF HISTORY AND THE GENIUS OF FELISTER'S BEING IN SO MANY DIFFERENT PLACES WHILE HE WAS PRACTICALLY BEYOND THE PHYSICAL LAWS OF THIS WORLD, AGENT MORALES[1] REALIZED THE MEANING OF THIS CURSE - FELISTER HAD PAID FOR IT WITH HIS OWN SOUL.

HE REMEMBERED HIS DIVORCE FROM HIS WIFE, WHO HAD GONE IN AN UNKNOWN DIRECTION WITH SOME ONE WHO WAS MUCH YOUNGER THAN HERSELF AND COULD HARDLY OFFER HER A MORE SERIOUS FUTURE. HE WASN'T HANDSOME, HE WASN'T RICH, HE DIDN'T EVEN THINK IT WAS FOR LOVE - BUT, AGAINST ALL LOGIC, HE DID. PERHAPS SHE HAD GROWN BORED WITH THEIR THIRTY-FIVE-YEAR MARRIAGE, OR PERHAPS THAT WAS JUST THE WAY IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE! HIS DAUGHTER WAS A GIFTED STUDENT, BUT SHE WAS IN A HURRY TO GET OUT OF THIS WASP'S NEST AND SAVE HERSELF AS QUICKLY AS POSSIBLE.

IT SEEMED LIKE YESTERDAY WHEN SHE HAD TOLD HIM IN THE SERIOUS TONE OF AN ADULT:

- DADDY, I DON'T BELONG TO YOU, WE LIVE IN DIFFERENT WORLDS, AND THERE'S JUST NO ROOM FOR ME IN YOURS. I'LL CHOOSE REAL LIFE, AND IF I CAN OUTGROW MYSELF, I WILL, IF NOT, I'LL JUST DIE.

THEN HE FELT A STRANGE FEELING, FOR SHE HAD REVEALED THE SECRET THAT HE HAD SO CAREFULLY KEPT FROM HER, THAT HE WAS SIMPLY DOING HIS DUTY AS A PARENT - AND, WELL, PERHAPS HE HAD SOME SYMPATHY FOR HER, FOR HER TALENTS SEEMED REALLY PROMISING, AND SHE WAS SUCH A WELL-MANNERED AND SWEET YOUNG LADY, BUT HE HAD NEVER FELT A FATHER'S LOVE FOR HER - NOT EVEN SINCE SHE WAS BORN. HE COULDN'T REMEMBER HIS PARENTS HAVING FELT IT FOR HIM EITHER - HE'D BEEN SENT TO THE FBR ACADEMY RIGHT OUT OF COLLEGE, AND FROM THERE ON HIS LIFE HAD BEEN TEXTBOOK.

HIS DAUGHTER WAS BEAUTIFUL AND EVEN ATTRACTIVE - UNLIKE HIS OWN WIFE, WHO WAS RATHER MEDIOCRE. THEY WERE LIKE TWO DIFFERENT UNIVERSES. HER NAME WAS AZARYA[2]. MAYBE IF HE HAD MARRIED SOMEONE LIKE HER ONCE, EVERYTHING WOULD BE DIFFERENT NOW - AND IT WOULDN'T HAVE COME TO THIS STRANGE COINCIDENCE AND ALL THESE PROBLEMS IN HIS PERSONAL LIFE.

APPARENTLY SHE HAD GROWN UP BEFORE HE KNEW IT AND BY THE TIME HE HAD TURNED AROUND AND HIS LIFE HAD GONE ON IN A VERY SAD AND SLOW WAY. AND THIS PARENT'S READINESS WAS LINKED TO AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS, AND WASN'T INTERNAL CONNECTEDNESS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT AND WHY WAS EXTERNAL EXPRESSION NECESSARY AT ALL? AGENT MORALES - THE GUARDIAN OF THE LAW! ONE WHO HAD SUCCEEDED WHERE MANY OTHERS HAD FAILED. HIS THOUGHTS WERE DEFINITELY GOING IN A STRANGE DIRECTION, BUT THE FED REALIZED - THE TIME SCENARIO, OR MORE ACCURATELY THE TIME PAUSE HE WAS LOCKED IN, WAS MAKING HIM FEEL EXTREMELY STRANGE. IT WAS AS IF HIS BODY HAD BEEN PLACED IN A SPECIFIC VACUUM, AND THE TOTALITY OF THE ACCUMULATED TIME-SPACE PARADOXES WAS PUSHING HIM TO CRUSHING. AS IF HE HAD TO RELIVE ALL THIS SUFFERING OVER AND OVER AGAIN IN A NEVER-ENDING CYCLE. WHOEVER HAD CAUGHT HIM IN THIS TRAP WAS BEATING HIMSELF UP A LOT. AND HE WAS DEFINITELY MEAN!

HE SAW ONE OF THE MEETING ROOMS AT FBR HEADQUARTERS IN WASHINGTON. THE ROOM WAS SET ASIDE FOR SPECIAL BRIEFINGS AND EVEN THE ATMOSPHERE WAS REDOLENT OF AN IMPORTANT SPEECH TO COME. HIS OWN COLLEAGUES, WERE PRESENT AT THE SPECIAL CEREMONY, AND THE DIRECTOR-GENERAL OF THE F.B.I. HAD DISTRIBUTED PROMOTIONS TO SOME OF THEM FOR THEIR SPECIAL SERVICES IN UNCOVERING THE LAUNDERED MONEY OF THE GREEDY AND BRUTAL BREEDER, FELISTER EMBANKS. THOUGH THE VISION WAS BURDENED BY SOME TEMPORAL DISTURBANCES, STILL MORALES COULD SEE EVERYTHING CLEARLY ENOUGH-AS THROUGH A FOGGED-UP AUTOMOBILE WINDSHIELD, WHICH HE HAD WIPED CLUMSILY WITH THE SLEEVE OF HIS GARMENT IN ORDER TO HAVE SOME VIEW DURING HIS JOURNEY.

THE WHOLE ROOM SPARKLED IN A FAIRY LIGHT AND HAD SOFT, PLEASANT LEATHER-UPHOLSTERED ARMCHAIRS, WITH A CONFERENCE TABLE IN THE MIDDLE OF IT.

HERE WERE JEKOVICH, THAT HYPOCRITICAL BLUESTOCKING AND CRIMINAL WHO'D EMBEZZLED SUBSTANTIAL SUMS OF MONEY FROM DRUG CARTELS, ERDON KNOX - HE USUALLY HELPED VARIOUS CORRUPT FIGURES OF STAR STATUS SORT OUT THEIR LEGAL STATUS PROBLEMS WHEN THEY HAD CONFLICTS OF INTEREST - ESPECIALLY IF THEY WERE CAUGHT RED-HANDED AND ... BUT THIS WAS DIEGO EMBANKS OR... NO, HIS EYES WEREN'T DECEIVING HIM AT ALL, THOUGH THE VIEW WAS HAZY. HIS HEAD WAS GOING TO EXPLODE. HOW COULD SUCH A PARADOX HAVE HAPPENED.

AND HOW DIEGO[3], WHO HAD DISAPPEARED TO WHO KNEW WHERE, AFTER HE HAD TAKEN UP THE TASK OF COOPERATING PHYSICALLY HE SHOULDN'T HAVE BEEN THERE - THERE WAS ABSOLUTELY NO LOGIC IN HIM BEING ANYWHERE. EXISTENCE ITSELF AS AN IDEA HAD TO BE A UNIFIED WHOLE, AND COULD NOT BE MADE UP OF DIFFERENT PARTS. BY THE SAME LOGIC, IF EXISTENCE HAD NO PARTS, IT FOLLOWED THAT IT HAD NO FORM, SINCE ALL FORM WAS MADE OF PARTS. AND THIS SERIOUS PROBLEM OF SEEKING THE TRUTH OF EXISTENCE WAS ALSO RELATED TO THE SETTING OF BOUNDARIES - IF THERE WAS NO FORM, THEN THERE WERE NO BOUNDARIES, AND IT ALSO FOLLOWED THAT THE ABSENCE OF FORM WAS