Stuck and Stoned, Millie Annaliece [best autobiographies to read txt] 📗

Elizabeth just got out of an abusive relationship with Prince of Seduction- Stone Miller. Stone Miller- the guy noone gets- he's too loud and annoying and cocky. But to Elizabeth he's a sweet misunderstood guy and she fell for him instantly. Until- the incident. Now she finds her heart longing for real love. She's tired of liars and guys who want her body and the worst kind- Abusers. As she sorts through her feelings and cuts her losses with Stone, she finds her heart two-timing her. Her heart wants to be wanted and she begins falling for Prince of Seduction all over again. Her guy friend Bodhi tries shielding her, but she finds her needy self dependent on Bodhi to save her from her heartbroken wounds. She wonders if that's real love, or should she go running back to Stone?

"The Angel of death is here for me to tell me it's my time. But I keep fighting because I know I have not done my job that Destiny sent me to do. Every day I get weaker and weaker because what made me fight is fading away from me. It is my fault for letting people get in my head. I try to show I was wrong but it does not matter because she hates my soul. So with my time that's left I say to her 'I'm sorry for the pain I caused'; her sorrow she feels now. I see that I can fight no more, so I say to the Angel of death 'Come take me. I have no destiny but to cause pain to the people I love. I can not do it any more. Come take my soul."

The words glared at me from the page in my lap. I felt tears well up in my eyes. I stopped breathing. I choked down a sob before it escaped. I couldn't cry in front of all these people. Especally not Bodhi, the one guy friend who let me come to him when Stone had hurt me. Now Stone's poem mocked the resolve I had built in the two weeks he'd been gone. I felt a single tear slide down my cheek

and stuffed the poem, along with my shattered heart into my purse. I stood up to leave he cafeteria, avoiding Bodhi's awareness of my pain. He looked at me questioning across the table, but I dropped my gaze in shame and left.

I avoided everyone's eyes as I fled to the Band & Choir room, the one place on campus I found solace. I knew there were people this school year who actually cared for me, and I longed for the brutal invisibility of years past.

I knew two of my friends, semi-close- were in the band room. Eva, the cheery, slightly heavyset blonde who was Stone's cousin. And Leah, the skinny, quiet, nosy optimist who just listened.

Eva came to me by the set of lockers when I collapsed into the floor. I was crying and holding myself in a ball to hide the blood on my clothes. Eva pulled me to my feet.

"It's Stone, isn't it?" she asked. I gave her a hug and she held me until I calmed down some. Leah then came oer, shooing Eva away.

She studied me and asked "Why is there blood on you?"

I didn't want to tell her what Stone done, so I lied. "It's not blood."

"What is it?"

"I knocked a jar of salsa on me this morning at home."

"DOing what?" she asked.

"Making an omelette."

She again studied me. "Are you lying?"

She knew I was so I said "Yeah."

"Stone?" she asked knowingly.

"Yeah. One single word."

"Did you or he do this?"

"Me," I admitted sheepishly.

"Oh Elizabeth!" she exclaimed, hugging me awkardly.

End of conversation for Leah. Or maybe the bell ended it. I'm not sure. THe bell rang for first period.

I had choir with Eva, Leah, and my bestest-friend-slash-sister-slash-doppleganger Kendra. I wish I could tell her what happened but I haven't told her anything except the first time he'd hit me. After that I kept my mouth shut for fear that I'd be blackmailed by Stone. He knew my weak spot and the ONE thing Kendra didn't know about me. The one thing she could NOT know about me.

Noone knows. Except of course the people involved. And Stone. I'll just say he's very persuasive and even possible seductive at times.

I knew I had to get to class. Teachers don't really approve of a 20 minute break to wash the tears off your face. Not a choir teacher with a performance approaching. I stayed in the bathroom until the bell rang for 2nd period, lost in thought, sitting on the cabinet against the mirror.

I knew Stone was persuasive, or at least to me. I can't help it though. The way he touched me, the wild look in is eyes, his voice soft, husky, dark-whispered against my hair or against my neck. His hand icey against the skin on my hip as he held me. THe smell of his cologne enveloped around me. Okay I admit it, I'm a sucker.

The bell rang for 2nd period, startling me. I jumped banging my head against the mirror, causing me to cry. Again. I grabbed my bag and fled to my 2nd period computer class. I didn't want to see Stone and frankly Kendra either.

I sat down at my computer i the back of the classroom, realizing Bodhi sat next to me in this class. I started up my computer and got onto the internet, pretending to be busy. Bodhi sat next to me, and I felt a tiny bit guilty at my hyper awareness of Bodhi.

I couldn't help it. His cologne tickled my senses. His black hair with those curls at the end, begging me to touch them. I was sure they'd bounce back but I was too scared to see. His gages were lime green today, the same ones he'd worn to the senior's graduation last year. His lip piercings weren't hidden yet today, meaning he'd been distracted.

My heart sankwhen he chose to ignore me instead of tease me like he usually did. He didn't even talk to Cody, his best friend.

"Bodhi, what's wrong?" I asked quietly. He didn't hear me, so I tapped him on the arm. He jumped back like I was a snake. The look he gave me said it all. He hated me. He hated that I'd put up with Stone and that I just let Stone push me around.

Bodhi removed an earbud and looked at me. "What?" he asked, not mean, but not inviting.

"Are you mad at me?" I asked. I was sure I looked scared to death, as if somehow his answer weighted my existence.

"No, Elizabeth. Why would I be mad at you?" he looked confused.

"You know, because of Stone?"

"I'm disappointed. I'm not mad."

"What's the difference?" I felt my voice rise.

"I don't know. But you shouldn't put up with him. Tell him to leave you alone."

"I can't!" I said, choking. I felt my face flame and tears stung my eyes.

"Why can't you?" he asked, not mean. Just curious. An innocent question. But it got me thinking.

"I love him." I whispered and then I felt the tears falling silently. Bodhi turned back to his computer and replaced his earbud.

I realized my arms were across my stomach hiding the blood again. Bodhi had seen it. Oh God, that wasn't good. Bodhi would think Stone had done it. And if I told him it was me who'd done it he'd ask why. And I would tell him. I couldn't lie to Bodhi. I don't know why. I just couldn't. He was too nice. Too honest. Too good.

I know people looked at his emo style of clothes and his piercings and his dark hair falling across his eyes. They think "Bad boy." His quiet deliberate disposition didn't help much.

But I knew better. For some reason I thought of him as "my" Bodhi. Was he? Of course not. He was always just a friend to me.

But I knew his quiet deliberateness was him listening to me when I wanted to talk. His "dark" charisma was a mystery I hadn't unlocked yet.

I knew he was good though. His aura was pure. And it had a soft edge of green- a caring soul. Maybe that's why I trusted him. Maybe that's why I was drawn to him. Maybe that's why-

"Ms. Hall, are you paying attention at all?" the sub's nasal voice broke my thoughts.

Everyone was looking at me. "Um, I- I'm sorry Ma'am. I apologize." That stupid toothpick cheerleader laughed at me.

My cheeks flamed again. Bodhi offered a weak smile. "Can you answer the question, Elizabeth?" the sub asked annoyed.

I lowered my head in shame. My cheeks burned. "No ma'am." I said quietly.

"Excuse me?"

I raised my voice. "No, I can't."

I turned to my computer and stared at the wall behind it. Finally the bell rang. I didn't hear it.

"Elizabeth?" Bodhi said.

"Yeah?" I asked, avoiding his eyes.

"The bell rang."

I didn't move. I was hoping he'd go. He didn't.

"Are you okay?" He reached his hand towards me.

I jumped up and grabbed my things and ran from the room. If he'd touched me, I would have broke. I couldn't do that. Not to Bodhi. I alreadly looked like a fool in his eyes. Did I have to make it worse? He probably thought I was helpless and unworthy if I let people hurt me like I did.

God, why did my best guy friend have to hate my choices with Stone?!

Why did I hate my choices with Stone?