You Know Who, Robin L. Deeter [mini ebook reader TXT] 📗

go out to Jessie. She’d been dealt one hell of a blow. He admired the way she was trying to go on. As he watched her gather her coat and purse, Ray felt guilty even though he hadn’t done anything wrong. Jessie balked when he suggested Olympo’s . That was her Ray’s place and she wasn’t going to go there. They settled on the coffee shop on the corner of the block. Neither of them were very hungry so they just ordered dessert.
Keeping his voice low, Ray said, “I’m really sorry about all this. I know it’s really unfair to you.”
She nodded and fiddled with her napkin.
“So tell me about Fraser, my unofficial partner from Canada.”
That brought tears to her eyes. “Oh God. Poor Ben. He doesn’t know since he’s still on vacation.” Ben was going to be bewildered.
“Yeah, I know. Welsh is going to talk to him when Fraser gets back.”
“Ok and I’ll talk to him, too.”
“So what’s he like? I mean, I was fully briefed on him but not the personal stuff, you know?”
Jessie collected her thoughts as she thought of her dear friend. “Ben is one in a million. He has so many quirks and just as many skills. I swear he’s like an encyclopedia and a dictionary combined. I’d like to know what his IQ is.”
Ray smiled at her description so far.
“He’s loyal, trustworthy, upholds the law at all costs, even if it pisses other people off and he can’t resist helping someone in need.”
“Jeez. The guy sounds like a saint.”
Jessie managed a small smile. “You could say that. He lives by his morals. You’ll have to get used to Diefenbaker, too.”
“The wolf.”
“Yeah. I hope you don’t mind wolf hair on the seats of your car.”
Oh boy. Ray hated to tell her the next part but there was no way around it. “I’m driving the Riviera.”
Jessie closed her eyes, pressing her hands against them. “You mean to tell me that I’m going to have to look at that car every day?” Her voice was tight with anger and anguish.
“I’m so sorry, Jessie.”
“I can’t do this right now, Ray.” She almost choked on the name. “I’m going back to work. Don’t take this the wrong way but please don’t come to see me any more today.”
“It’s ok. I get it. I’ll see you tomorrow, though.”
“Yeah. Ok. Bye.”

Chapter Nine

The next two days were hell for Jessie. She saw her Ray everywhere at the station. Once she even thought she heard his voice but quickly realized it was a trick of her imagination. At night she lie awake aching inside for Ray. By the third morning Jessie had reached the limit of her tolerance. She called in and told Welsh that she was taking a week’s vacation and if he didn’t like it he could kiss her ass. Welsh didn’t take it personally, knowing that it was just Jessie’s emotional state of mind talking.
After hanging up with her superior, Jessie crawled into bed and stayed there for two days, only moving from the bed when it was absolutely necessary. Those days consisted of crying and sleeping. Dreams of Ray haunted her and when she woke reality would set in all over again.
On the evening of the second day, Jessie heard someone knocking at her back door. She didn’t get up. All she wanted was to be left alone. Curling up, Jessie went back to sleep. The next thing she knew a hand was shaking her shoulder.
“Go away,” she protested, not caring who it was.
“Jessie, it’s me. It’s Ben.”
She came awake when she recognized his voice. Pulling herself up on her elbow, Jessie pushed her unkempt hair out of her eyes so she could see him. Her pain was mirrored in his eyes. Her heart broke anew, not only for herself but for Ben, too. He sat down beside her. Jessie reached up to touch his face, moisture gathering in her eyes and spilling over.
Silently Fraser gathered her to him, holding her and trying to comfort her even in the midst of his own hurt and confusion. Jessie’s harsh sobs caused tears to sting his eyes.
“I just don’t understand how they could make him do this. How they could be so cruel, making him leave his life. To leave all of us.” She pulled away from Ben, sitting up in the bed. “Why did they have to pick him?” Rising from the bed, Jessie began pacing. “They should have picked someone who didn’t have any family ties, who didn’t have people who cared about them. And now I’m just supposed to go on like nothing has happened? That is just such utter bullshit!” She picked up a porcelain figurine and hurled it at the mirror on her bureau, shattering it. The carpet was sprayed with shards of glass.
Instantly Fraser came off the bed, grabbing Jessie’s hands, binding them before she could find anything else to throw. He didn’t want her to hurt herself. When she collapsed, Fraser picked her up and put her back in bed, covering her. He stayed with her until she was in a deep sleep. As soon as she woke again Fraser made her eat. There’d been no evidence in the kitchen that she’d cooked or even made a sandwich. In fact he’d taken the liberty of throwing away everything that had gone bad in her refrigerator.
Jessie listlessly ate the canned soup Ben had heated for her. “How did you find out?” She didn’t need to tell him what she was talking about.
He relayed the story, telling her how he’d found his apartment building burned to the ground and about the Vecchio house being set on fire. She was shocked to hear about both events and planned to call Frannie right away in the morning. She was relieved that Ben and Ray had been able to capture the arsonist. “You can stay here in my spare room, Ben.”
He smiled. “My pack is in the living room. I knew you’d say that. Dief’s asleep on your couch.”
Her gaze was empathetic as she met his eyes. “How are you doing with this?”
Ben shrugged and fell silent for a moment. “I guess I feel some of the same things you do. Hurt, confusion. I don’t think it’s as bad for me, though. I’m not in love with him.”
“I’m glad to hear that. I wouldn’t want to have to fight you for him.” She gave a small laugh and suddenly she was laughing and crying all at once. She hugged Ben, trying to comfort him just as he was trying to be there for her. She released him and said, “I’m sorry I didn’t pick you up at the train. I wasn’t thinking very clearly.”
“It’s ok. I understand.”
They talked for a little while longer before Ben turned in.
Jessie finished out her week’s vacation, spending the time cleaning her neglected house and working to put her mind and emotions in order. Having Fraser and Dief around the house was a great comfort to her and helped distract her a little. It was much the same for Fraser, although a little strange since he was used to dealing with difficult situations on his own.
On the night before Jessie was scheduled to go back to work Fraser brought Ray home with him. Even though it ripped at Jessie’s heart to call this man by Ray’s name, she did it. She treated him with kindness knowing that none of this was his fault and that he was just doing his job. She was grateful to this Ray for helping keep her Ray safe. That was how she compartmentalized the two men; her Ray and this Ray.
They sat drinking coffee and eating Oreos in the kitchen, Dief begging for a treat from Jessie.
Ray laughed at the wolf. “He sure likes junk food, Fraser,” he remarked as Jessie gave Dief a piece of a cookie.
“Yes. It’s partly Ray’s fault and the urban influence altogether,” Fraser responded.
Jessie was glad that this Ray didn’t call Fraser Benny. She wouldn’t have been able to bear it.
“Hey, Jessie, I hear that you have a really cool Corvette.”
Jessie froze, coffee cup halfway to her mouth. She put it down with a thump, the liquid inside slopping over the brim. Memories assaulted her; the first drive she and Ray had taken in the Vette, Ray’s smile as they’d raced along and his skill at navigating the sharp twists and turns out on Moyer Drive. She remembered their first kiss that day, how they’d steamed up the windows. They’d done that a lot since then, either in her car or the Riv. Even though her eyes became damp, she smiled as she heard Ray in her mind after they’d made love in the cramped back seat of the Vette.
He’d laughed and said, “Damn, Jess. You make me feel eighteen again. How do you do that?”
She came back to herself when Ben handed her a napkin. Wiping her eyes, she said, “You can see it if you want.”
“Only if you want to show me.”
Jessie nodded. “I guess you really should to keep up appearances. That way you’ll know what you’re talking about.”
Fraser accompanied them to the garage. Jessie hadn’t ventured out there since the last day she’d driven home. The sight of the silver car was a blow to her. As she opened the driver’s side door the scent of Ray’s favorite cologne hit her. She slid into the seat quickly, closing the door. She breathed in the scent, wrapping her arms around herself, holding in the hurt.
Fraser opened the other door. “Jessie?”
“It’s like I can feel him, Ben. I smell his cologne and it’s like he’s right here with me instead of miles away.”
Fraser knew exactly what Jessie was feeling. He’d been through it all himself but for different reasons. “I know.”
Ray poked his head in, concern on his face. “Look, maybe this wasn’t a good idea.”
“No, it’s ok. I had to face it sometime.” She patted the passenger seat.
Ray sat down hesitantly, letting out a low whistle. “This is one slick machine alright.”
“Thanks. It was my dad’s. I need to explain something to you, Ray.”
The electric blue gaze locked on hers. “Ray, my Ray, was the only one outside of my dad and me who ever drove this car and I don’t know that I would ever be able to ever let you drive it. I’m not trying to make you feel bad and I hope you can understand.”
“It’s ok,” he said with a shrug. “So you mean Fraser here has never driven it?”
“No.” She chuckled. “Are you kidding? Have you seen him drive yet?” Leaning towards the passenger side, she smiled at Ben. “No offense.”
He made a gesture of understanding. “None taken.”
“Well, thanks for showing it to me. You’re a good sport.” He gave her