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stong for her.
&
I got out of my daze and I was still sitting in the pue waiting until everybody saw her body. My aunt said we should go to the car so we can be there to the final cermony. I hated going to cemetaries. I hated that this would be the last time I see her. I loved her smile, She would light up my day. But now the darkness has come back and I'm caught up in a webb again trying to break out of it. But how? I had so many questions for Hope. Like why did she leave me or did she ever think about my feelings. Anger started to come up and tears came down my cheeks. But I didn't want to cry. Hope needed me and I had let her down. I went back to thinking as we waited for the police to start directing the traffic.
Hope


Hope: I love you so much but no matter what happens I want you to have a good life.
Me: But Hope my life is incomplete without you
Hope: Don't say that, when you grow old and have kids you will see me again, and in a better place.
Me: Hope I love you so much I can't let you go.
She let go of my hand and grabbed a tissue and handed it to me.
Me: Isn't this a little backwards?
Hope: What is?
Me: I'm suppose to be supplying the tissues for you
She laughed.
Me: Aren't you scared?
Hope: Of what? dying
Me: Yeah
Hope: No I'm just afraid of loosing you and my family.
Me: Hope you will always be in my heart.
Hope: I know that and you will always be in mines.
Me: Does your parents know?
Hope: They know I have lekumia but they don't know I only have 3 months to live
Me: Are you going to tell them?
She was silent.
Me: Are you?
Hope: NO
Me: Why not?
Hope: Look your my bestfriend right?
Me: Yeah, right
Hope: And if I was to tell you to keep a secret you promise you would keep it
Me: Yes
Hope: Well I don't want them to know, I want them to feel the pain when my time is up.
Me: Hope your kidding
Hope: No they haven't been here for me now and they won't be there for me when I die so why should I care.
Me: Hope you have to tell them
Hope: No and you said you wouldn't tell them right
Me: But Hope
Hope: Josh please I'm counting on you
Me: Fine
She hugged me and kissed me.
I could feel her body getting weaker and weaker. I had wished a miracle would soon come one day and me and Hope be together forever with our four kids.
Me: Hope you stay strong and you will grow to be old.
She laughed and put her head on my chest.

The Cemetary


We had finally arrived at the cemetary and I was nervous. My aunt had brought flowers and I brought our friendship bracelet she had made for me and her. As the cermony went on it was the final. I layed the flowers and bracelet on her white casket as they pulled it down. Then I blew a kiss at her. I walked over to her parents.
Me: Umm sorry for your lost
Mrs. Bate: Look I will never be able to trust you again. My baby gurl could've had a whole life ahead of her
Me: How is her death my fault?
Mr. Bate: You didn't tell us our gurl only had 2 months to live
Me: The doc told her 3 but I guess not, and belive me I wanted to tell you guys but she told me to promise and not to tell you all.
Mrs. Bate: Well how come?
Me: She said you were never in her life when she was alive and you won't be in hers when she died.
Mr. Bate: Enough!
Me: So look don't blame me, I loved your daughter so much
Mrs. Bate: And she loved you
Me: What?
Mrs. Bate: Look we didn't know how to tell you this but Hope was pregnant.
Me: What you must have mistakened
Mr. Bate: No she died early because of it
Me: Why didn't she tell me?
Mrs. Bate: She was afraid
Tears ran down my eyes.
Me: Well how do you know that?
They handed me a diary that said HOPE'S SECRETS. They showed me the page. It read

Dear Bestfriend,
It's been alot and I have kept so many things from you. Like one I was pregnant with your baby.

I stoped I couldn't read no more. I threw the book on the ground and walked to the car. Then I went back to rembering as the tears ran down.

Hope: Look everything will be ok
Me: One more question
Hope: What?
Me: Aren't you mad?
Hope: When I first found out that I had lekumia I couldn't belive my ears. Then they told me I had only 3 months to live I was devestated, I was mad and angry but I had to do whats right. Stope being mad at God and get over it. He is taking me to a better place.
Tears ran down her eyes.
Me: Look I love you so much
Hope: I wish I could stay but God has better plans for me.
Tears came out my eyes.
Me: Hope I won't you to finish the list you made
Hope: I can't, Josh you were right going to Las Vagas is impossible
Me: No I was stupid and wrong!
Hope: I can't

Imprint

Publication Date: 06-07-2012

All Rights Reserved

Dedication:
I dedicte this book to my friends.

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