The Uncontrollable, Lauren N. [ebooks children's books free TXT] 📗

Chapter 1: Wassssabiii!

Kelsi POV


"Wasssabiii!!! Watsup Bree Bree?!" I yelled in my friend Brianna's ear."Morning Kelsi. What the hell is wasabi?"
She asked giving me a weird look." I dunno. Some type of spicy sauce that you eat with food. It's from Japan. I heard it on Annoying Orange."I said to my friend jumping up and down. Brianna's my childhood friend so she's used to my weird remarks. " Go look it up if you don't know what it is. With your photographic memory, I bet you remember the whole episode." She said groaning. If you're wondering what a photographic memory is, it means everything I've ever heard, seen, or came across with is permanently etched in my brain. Pretty cool right? I know. It's awesome. My nose crinkled as I smelled lots of perfume. It could only be one person. " Oh my gursh nursh. Here she comes." I groaned as I turned around. Julliane Parkforrest. The crazy psycho red smurf who's been at my throat sonce we were 10. 6 years passed and she's still on my nutsack. I don't think this freak-nut will ever stop. " Hey Kels." She said in her high-pitched voice. God, I wanted to knock her teeth out. " Wasabi. You don't have the right to call me that you red smurf." I said sticking my tongue out at her " Shut up. You're so annoying." She said." Your the one that came up and talked to me first you freak-nut. I don't like it when people tell me what to do." I said checking my nails.
" Shut up." She said.
" I won't."
Yeah, you will."
" No I won't."
" You're annoying." She said.
" So are you."
" No I'm not."
" Yeah-huh."
Nuh-huh." She said
" Green old granny alien."
" What?"
" S my D."
" What is wrong with you?"
" I.D.G.A.F"
" You've got problems." She said
" I heart hello kitty."
" Slut."
As soon as she said that, I walked up to her, punched her in the nose and broke it ( I heard the crunch), spit on her legs which she cared so much for, then started singing Scream for My Ice cream: Blood on the Dance Floor.
She's melting
She's melting
Oh! oh! oh!
She licked me like I'm ice cream

Dipping with my dipper
We be drinking up the liqour
Party like her birthday
Shake it like an earthquake

Melting like an ice cream cone
Going for her danger zone
Go and suck my lollipop
Sugar sweet cherry topped

Ferr sure fit
To legit
Hot spot
Twirk it bitch

Strip it down
Work it up
Baby let me
Fill your cups

Oh to the em to the em to the gee
Sticky messy
Taste my treat
But I love it when you

Scream for my ice cream
Tell me all your dirty dreams
Scream for my ice cream
Well show me what's your fantacies

I stopped there because the bell rang. I turned around and looked at Julliane on the ground. Her nose was bleeding. Awesome. " That's a lesson to you waffle.I'm the flpjack so don't stick your fake boobs where they don't belong. They should be in the trash. Red Smurf." I stuck up the 3 fingers between my thumb and pinky and told her to read between the lines. Then I walked to my first class feeling accomplished.Instead of knocking her teeth out, I broke her nose. Not as fulfilling, but it's getting there. " You know,we really should get some wasabi Bree Bree. I'm craving it. But just the sauce. I heard it was green. I wonder if It'll taste good with marshmallows?" Bree Bree just looked at me. " S.M.H. Will you ever be normal?" She asked me holding the bridge of her nose. " Nope," I said popping the p, " Never." Wasabi has really got to me.

Chapter 2: Our who are where?!

Kelsi P.O.V.


When I got home, it was a mess. Police cars everywhere and neighbors outside. All looking at my house What the fruck is going on? As soon as I stepped into the door, all guns were pointed at me. " Put those things away before you blow my brains out and I haunt you in your sleep," I said, " I live here." They put them down. " Chris n' chips, what in the name of flying pigs is going on?!" I yelled at my brother. Wherever he was.He came barreling down the stairs. " Kelsi, Oh my god! I'm so glad you're okay." He said giving me a bear hug. I wiggled out of him. " I'm going to my room." I declared walking up the stairs. He tried to stop me. When I got to my room, I knew why he did. " Drake? Where in the name of all things waffley - you know what, now i'm angry - where the fuck is my shit?!" I yelled at the top of my lungs." Yeah.... um well, you see, it turns out that our mom and dad weren't really our mom and dad," He said flustered," They're in heaven." He said sighing. " Our who are where?!And you still haven't answered my question." I said angrily. " Ok, heres the deal. Our parents were fake. For the past month, we've been living with some bastards in masks. Our real parents were murdered. Then the fakies took all our fucking furniture, and left. We're pretty much left with our clothes' shoes' bags, hats,and all that other stuff." I was dumbfounded.That's a world turner. " I really don't care what happened to Maurie and Jay.They didn't like me anyways. Besides we're adopted." I said shrugging my shoulders. Yes, the weird, happy, and fearless ( More or less ) Kelsi Matthews is adopted. Get off my chiz. " Anyways, since I have to deal with all of this and fix everything, You'll have to stay at my friends' house." He said running his hand through hi s hair." Why can't I just stay with you?" I asked putting my hands on my hips. " Because it's not safe." He said sternly.
" Ok, These friends of yours, are they guys?" I asked curiously.
" Yes." He said rolling his eyes.
" How many?" I asked moving my eyebrows.
" 10"
" Are there any girls?"
" Yup, 2. That would make a total of 12 people."
" 13 if you count me."
" Perv."
" I'll go get packing." I said smirking.Oh, this is going to be fun.

Chapter 3: I'm Kelsi Kanoko Adriana Rina Marisol Matthews

As soon as I pulled up th the 'house', my jaw hit the pavement.It was as big as a school! " I-I-I'll still be going to the same school right?" i said stuttering." Yeah. You'll just have to wake up and go to sleep earlier." I groaned. I'm a very deep sleeper, but it usually depends on my mood. When I got inside, I almost started to drool. You know what I saw? 10 of the most smexiiest guys on the planet, all shirtless and ripped with 6 and 8 packs. Yes, I did count. Oh, this is not a safe environment for me.My smirk got real wide. I silently wolf whistled as a really tall,really HOT guy walked up tp my brother. May I remind you that I'm only 5'3 so EVERYONE is taller than me.I watched him until he got to where we were. My brother scoffed. " Kelsi stop being a pervy monkey." He said not even looking at me. Damn, he's good.I turned around slowly and grabbed my favorite piece of hair and tapped it on my lips. " Hey Matt. That's my sister Kelsi. She's a bit weird in the head if you recall. Anyways, watch out for her. She's like a wolf hunting for prey." " Gasp! I am not!" I said rolling my eyes. He gave me that 'mhhmm' look. I hated that look. Before you know it, it was time for my bro to go. My heart started to hurt. " be good Kelsi. I'll drop in sometimes to visit. I'll call too. Now, don't do anything I wouldnt do." He said smirking. " Gasp! Brother dearest, you're so naughty! Besides you do everything..." I said acting dramatically like they do in those old British soap operas. Those always made me laugh. He was headed for the door. " Peace out bro-bro-brolio, I love you. I see ya when I see ya. Don't cry over meh with your room door locked jacking off." I said smiling. " I do not jack off! Jeez, you always have to leave someone on a bad note." He huffed. With that, he was gone. There was a awkward silence to I had to break it. " Garbanzo beans! Anyways, nice to meet'chya smexii people," I said with a country accent, " You're probably wondering if I'm okay. I'm peachy-keen for my name is Kelsi Kanoko Adriana Rina Marisol Matthews. That's the saying right? Anyways, I'll repeat my name for those who are a bit slow in the head. My name is Kelsi Kanoko Adriana Rina Marisol Matthews. I am Japanese, Mexican, American, and African. I speak fluent japanese, spanish, and korean. And if I must say, you boys are very, very, hot." Then they busted out laughing. I really didn't see what was so funny. " Well hey Kelsi something something something Matthews."A person who was sitting on the floor said. " My name is not something. It's Kelsi Kanoko Adriana Rina Marisol Matthews. And who might you be floor person?" I asked. He chuckled. I seriously DO NOT see what was so funny." I'm Jacob.And if I must say, you're very, very hot yourself." He winked. They started laughing again. " Hey, I'm the wolf here. Don't steal my thunder. And of course I'm hot. I'm Kelsi Kanoko Adriana Rina Marisol Matthews." I said smiling. it's good to be me. " Now if one of you boys will please help me with my bags and show me to my room, I