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am happy to say is almost in his dotage, and she is

enjoying herself.

The rain continued. Caroline and Louisa amused

themselves by deciding what they will wear for the ball,

whilst Bingley and I discussed the war. I am beginning to

find the country tiresome. At home, at Pemberley, I have

plenty to occupy me, but here there is little to do beyond

reading or playing billiards when the weather is poor.

I will be interested to see if this spell of wet weather

dissuades Bingley from buying Netherfield. A country

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A M A N D A G R A N G E

estate in the sunshine is a very different thing from a

country estate in the rain.

Monday 25th November

I am glad of the ball. At least, if we have another wet day

tomorrow, we will have something to occupy us.

Tuesday 26th November

The morning was wet, and I spent it writing letters.This

afternoon, Bingley and his sisters were involved in final

preparations for the ball. I had little to do and was vexed

to find myself thinking of Miss Elizabeth Bennet, so

much so that when the party from Longbourn arrived

this evening I found myself looking for her. I thought I

had put her out of my mind, but I am not as impervious

to her as I had supposed.

‘Jane looks charming,’ said Caroline, as her brother

moved forward to greet Miss Bennet.

‘It is a pity the same cannot be said for her sister,’ said

Louisa. ‘What is Miss Elizabeth Bennet wearing?’

Caroline regarded her with a droll eye.

‘Miss Eliza Bennet scorns fashion, and is wearing a

dress that is three inches too long and uses a great deal

too much lace. Do you not think so, Mr Darcy?’

‘I know nothing about ladies’ fashions,’ I said, ‘but she

looks very well to me.’

Caroline was silenced, but only for a moment.

‘I wonder who she can be looking for. She is certainly

looking for someone.’

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M r . D a r c y ’ s D i a r y 8 3

‘She is probably looking for the officers,’ said Louisa.

‘Then she is not as quick as her sisters, for they have

already found them,’ said Caroline.

The younger girls had run noisily across the ballroom,

and were greeting the officers with laughs and squeals.

‘If they move any closer to Mr Denny, they will suffocate him!’ remarked Louisa.

‘You would not like to see your sister behaving in

such a way with the officers, I am persuaded,’ said Caroline, turning to me.

She did not mean to wound me, and yet her remark

could not have been less well chosen. It sent my thoughts

to Georgiana, and from thence to Wickham, who was to

don a red coat. No, I would not like to see it, but I was

uncomfortably aware that if I had not arrived in Ramsgate without warning, it could almost have come to pass.

Caroline looked alarmed as my face went white, but I

managed to reply coolly enough:‘Are you comparing my

sister to Lydia Bennet?’

‘They are the same age!’ said Louisa, with a trill of

laughter.

‘No, of course not,’ said Caroline quickly, realizing she

had made a mistake. ‘There can be no comparison. I

meant only that the Bennet girls are allowed to run wild.’

I gave a cool nod and then moved away from her,

hoping that Elizabeth’s glances round the room had been

for me.As I drew close to the officers, I heard Denny saying to Miss Lydia Bennet that Wickham was not there as

he had been forced to go out of town for a few days.

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A M A N D A G R A N G E

‘Oh!’ she said, her face dropping.

Elizabeth had joined them and she, too, looked disappointed. I remembered the look she had bestowed on

Wickham in Meryton and I felt my hands clench as I

realized with an unpleasant shock that when she had

entered the ballroom she had been looking for Wickham, and not for me.

‘I do not imagine his business would have called him

away just now if he had not wished to avoid a certain

gentleman here,’ I overheard Mr Denny saying.

So he had turned coward, had he? I could not wonder at it. Courage was never a part of Wickham’s character. Imposing on the gullible, deceiving the innocent and

seducing young girls, that was his strength.

But surely Elizabeth was not gullible? No. She was not

to be so easily taken in. She might not have found him

out yet, but I was confident she would do so. In the

meantime, I did not want to miss the opportunity of

speaking to her.

I continued walking towards her.

‘I am glad to see you here. I hope you had a pleasant

journey?’ I asked. ‘This time, I hope you did not have to

walk!’

‘No, I thank you,’ she said stiffly. ‘I came in the carriage.’

I wondered if I had offended her. Perhaps she felt I

had meant my remark as a slight on her family’s inability

to keep horses purely for their carriage. I tried to repair

the damage of my first remark.

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M r . D a r c y ’ s D i a r y 8 5

‘You are looking forward to the ball?’

She turned and looked at me directly.

‘It is the company that makes a ball, Mr Darcy. I enjoy

any entertainment at which my friends are present.’

‘Then I am sure you will enjoy your evening here,’ I

said.

She turned away with a degree of ill-humour that

shocked me. She did not even manage to overcome it

when speaking to Bingley, and I resolved I had done with

her. Let her turn her shoulder when I spoke to her. Let

her prefer Wickham to me. I wanted nothing more to do

with her.

She left her sisters and crossed the room to speak to

her friend, Miss Lucas, and then her hand was sought by

the heavy young clergyman I had seen with her at Meryton. Despite my anger, I could not help but feel sorry for

her. I had never seen a display of more mortifying dancing in my life. From her expression, I could tell she felt

the same. He went left when he should have gone right.

He went back when

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