Simply Feminine � Surprising Insights from Men, Wonderly, Morgan [best ereader manga txt] 📗

men to be attracted to women with these basic visual characteristics, which serve to help men, much as we women are served by our sense of intuition. In fairness, we would no more wish upon men the loss of their natural visual discernment than we would wish upon ourselves the loss of our natural intuitive discernment. In terms of visual qualities, as with inner qualities, what men look for in women are simple feminine basics. Ironically, many women unknowingly neglect these basics, and instead work on aspects of their appearance that matter little to men.

Whether we want to admit it or not, men are not alone in exercising discernment based on visual information. Sizing a person up quickly from a distance is an important part of our natural protective wiring. Our feminine intuition could not function well without the visual element. We have all had the experience of seeing someone from a distance, intuitively feeling something is off, and keeping our distance. It will serve us well, as women, to appreciate that men and women alike are visually and intuitively discerning.

What men tell me they want to see is a simple, authentic expression of our inner feminine, not some kind of display of pretended perfection. Just as we women intuitively feel a lack of trust when a man seems too perfect, so men also sense something may be too good to be true when women present themselves as too perfect.

But, when we enhance our best features by bringing focus to them, men immediately notice. For example, if our best features are our healthy hair, long legs, and big eyes, we can make them more beautiful, shapely, and alluring by putting additional emphasis on them, which also serves to downplay our less attractive features. We don’t need to be raving beauties to possess an alluring feminine image that attracts men.

If you’re in a relationship and desire to create a feminine image, ask your man what he likes. He probably won’t describe it to you, as it’s hard for him to put into words, but if you show him, he can say “yes” or “no.” When you try something on, study his face and you will know immediately. If he likes it, his eyes will light up, he will smile, and he’ll likely verbalize something akin to “Wow!” If he doesn’t deliver a similar response, he’s probably not crazy about the look. Remember, before your man will be honest with his opinion, he has to trust that you won’t get upset with him. While you’re earning his trust, use your intuition and his nonverbal cues to know whether he likes the look you’ve put together or not.

Here are some thoughts on outer beauty from a man’s perspective:

“Femininity comes in many unique forms, not just in good looks and a stylish appearance. Regardless of any quirks, if it is genuine, it will be endearing, and someone will find the whole package very attractive, flaws and all.”

– Ken

“As a man, I love seeing the feminine body showcased to emphasize the differences between men and women’s bodies. I like to see our differences accentuated.”

– John

“Men are attracted to qualities and attributes that are strictly female. For instance, it is alluring for a woman to wear a dress, heels, lipstick, perfume, nail and toe polish, earrings and other jewelry, and to have longish hair. Believe me, men are very much aware of those things.”

– Kenny, California

“I will often compliment a woman who inspires me. It might be a bank teller who has beautifully manicured and polished nails, or a retail clerk with a striking hairstyle, or a woman standing in line wearing a pretty dress. I’m not hitting on them, but appreciating the effort they’ve made to be feminine. It makes me feel good to compliment them, and it makes them feel good. Which is really the point. They deserve it.”

– Randy,

Retired CEO of Electronics Company, Ashland, OR

“There is a large disconnect between men and women when it comes to the subject of women’s outer appearance. We men are primarily attracted to the inner feminine qualities of women, and look for simple outer representations of them. In the meantime, women have been persuaded to hide their inner feminine qualities as being some kind of weakness, immaturity, ineffectiveness. Then, instead of showcasing the inner feminine qualities, women engage in superficial public display. In the meantime, men look for outer representations of inner beauty, and are disappointed when women have engaged in this artificial process. Women are more authentic and more pleasing to men, when they enhance their appearance based on their inner quality to men, versus assuming men to be superficial.”

– Eric, I.T. Consultant, Seattle, WA

Men Love Our Smiles

“Smile! In every language, in every culture—it is the light in your window that tells people there’s a caring, sharing individual inside and it’s the universal code for “I’m O.K.—You’re O.K., too.”

–Dr. Denis Waitley, Author of The Psychology of Winning

Our smiles top the list of attractive features because, from the perspective of men, a smile is the most important visual first impression.

We women underestimate the power of our radiant, feminine smile to attract men. Few of us comprehend what this kind of beautiful smile means to men. We can dress to the nines, but where men are concerned, if we don’t smile, our allure and magnetism are canceled out. Men perceive unsmiling women as unattractive, unreceptive, and unavailable.

Our smile can light up a man’s world and send a warm welcome. Our smile is inviting to him and implies our openness to a conversation. Our smile makes him feel masculine and admired. It also makes us appear much more beautiful and youthful.

“You’re never fully dressed without a smile.”

– from the Broadway musical Annie

Perhaps one reason we aren’t aware of the impact of our feminine smiles on men is that men’s smiles don’t have a corresponding effect on us. In most cases, we can be just as attracted to a man with