Nearly Departed, Max Schlienger [the gingerbread man read aloud txt] 📗

find Alena awake and waiting for him. He brushed through the door, intending to hang up his jacket and fall into bed, but the sight of her reading at the dining table stopped him in his tracks.

“Hi!” he said. “I didn’t expect you to be up.”

“I didn’t expect you to be out this late,” replied Alena. “How’s Luke?”

Dennis made a face and sat down across from her. “What makes you so sure that I was out with Luke?”

“None of your other friends would keep you out until this hour on a Tuesday.”

“Alright, fair point.” Dennis stood and walked to the bedroom, kicking off his shoes and throwing his coat into the open closet. Alena was still reading when he came back out, but she saved her place with her thumb and gave Dennis a scrutinizing look.

“So, what did you guys do?”

Dennis retook his seat and squinted at the ceiling. “Well, we hired a camera crew and a couple of hookers, then we broke into Robin Williams’ house and painted everything blue. It’s too bad that we had to leave in the middle of it, I thought we had an Academy Award winner in the works.” He smiled hopefully, but his wife did not appear to be amused. “Fine, he got me drunk and convinced me to come on a ghost tour.”

Alena blinked and raised an eyebrow. “A ghost tour?”

“Yeah, here, look.” Dennis pulled out the flyer, which was irreparably wrinkled after its stay in his pocket. “This guy named Jim took us around to all of these haunted houses and told us stories about their history and whatnot.”

“That’s it?”

Dennis shrugged. “It was better than I’m making it sound.”

“Uh-huh.” Alena rubbed her eye with a finger. “This doesn’t have anything to do with that woman you told me about, does it?”

“Who, Elspeth?” He shook his head. “No, we stayed in the city, kind of near that sushi place that you like.” It wasn’t exactly the truth, but he didn’t think that avoiding the question really counted as being dishonest.

“More research for your book, then?” Alena’s tone, while not exactly accusatory, definitely carried a hint of disapproval. “How’s that coming, by the way?”

“Actually, it’s funny that you mention that,” replied Dennis with a smile. “The tour guide tonight – he called himself a ‘ghost hunter,’ by the way – asked me to sign a book for him.”

“That’s nice. You haven’t written any more, have you?”

Dennis shook his head. “Not a page,” he confessed. “I don’t know, Alena, the whole premise seems kind of stupid now. I might just scrap it and try something else.”

“Oh, really?” huffed Alena. “So, these past few months working with Sam have been for what? The hell of it? Or do you really plan on being a con artist again?”

The irritation in his wife’s voice made Dennis wince. “In my defense, I was never really a con artist. Other than the one time, I mean.”

“What about the thousand dollars you stole from that woman?”

“Hey, I did not steal that,” protested Dennis. “And I didn’t keep it, remember?” Alena didn’t respond, and for a sickening moment Dennis was sure that she had found out about his having given the check to Luke. “Look, you’re right,” he said hurriedly, “I haven’t been working as hard as I could, but I will. Like I said before, this is going to be the last job that I do for Sam. As soon as it’s over with, I’m done. I won’t do anything but write.” He relaxed when Alena nodded, but immediately tightened up again when she threw out another question.

“Why don’t you just call and cancel tomorrow, then?” she asked. “If you’re done, then you’re done, and you don’t need to help Sam get any more patients.”

“Clients,” Dennis corrected. “I mean, no, wait, you were right. Patients.” He waved a hand nervously. “I can’t do that. I have an obligation to be there, and I’m going to fulfill it, but I’ll get it over with as soon as I can.”

Alena’s eyes narrowed. “And you won’t take any more money from her, even if she insists?”

“No.”

“No what?”

“No,” Dennis said again, rolling his eyes, “I won’t take any money from her.”

“Thank you,” replied Alena. She slid a bookmark into the spot where her thumb had been and closed her book. “I’m going to hold you to it, Dennis. Tomorrow is your last day, even if she doesn’t agree to see Sam.” She stood up. “I’m going to bed. Are you coming, or are you going to stay up for a bit?”

“I think I’ll stay up,” Dennis said. “I’ll be in later.” He watched Alena leave the room without another word, then thumped his head down on the table. Now he had two promises to keep, and absolutely no idea how to go about keeping them.

Wednesday began badly. Recalling the past evening’s fight with Alena had left Dennis feeling irritable and anxious. If that hadn’t been enough, the morning had brought with it the realization that he had accidentally left his car’s headlights on the night before, and had managed to drain his car’s battery to the point where turning the key rewarded him with little more than a pathetic whimper from the motor. Finally, as an added punch line to his already aggravating day, he wound up discovering that he had put his shirt on inside-out.

“No, really, I think it makes an impressive fashion statement,” Bobo stated, doing little to hide his wide grin. Dennis struggled to right the orientation of his clothing, cursing the tight fit of his thin turtleneck. “It has a counter-culture sort of vibe to it. The ultimate statement of nonconformity.”

“Then why did you bother pointing it out?” Dennis grumbled, working his arms through the sleeves. Bobo shrugged and faced forward in his seat, looking up through the windshield.

“Looks like it might rain.”

“It already did. I had to pop-start my car in it.”

Bobo looked back at Dennis. “Really? I thought your hair was just like that.”

Dennis