Happy Kids, Cathy Glass [best ebook reader for ubuntu .TXT] 📗

*  Allow a child age-appropriate control so that he or she is encouraged towards sensible decision making.

*  Don’t use the third person when addressing a child; instead, refer to yourself as ‘I’.

*  Operate a system of rewards and sanctions, in line with nursery policy.

*  Make full use of the closed choice – it works with all aged children, in any situation.

*  Remember that it is the behaviour of the child that is wrong, not the child.

*  Use time out in line with the nursery’s policy.

*  Teach cooperation, both on a one-to-one basis and within the group – cooperation is an essential ingredient of life.

Childminders

In many respects childminders are like mini nurseries, although childminders work from home and are self-employed. All childminders have to be registered, trained, inspected and keep detailed logs, and they are expected to provide the same high standard of day care as a nursery. As a childminder, however, you will be working with fewer children (in Britain, no more than six, including your own), and will very likely be working by yourself. Because of the small number of children, and being home-based, the childminder can more easily step into the role of a surrogate parent on a daily basis than the staff at a large day centre. This can be useful for engendering security, maintaining continuity and working closely with the parents.

As a childminder you and the child’s parents will have both signed a behaviour policy drawn up by you and agreed with the parents. This document details your aims and objectives for nurturing and caring for the child, as well as your methods for guiding the child to acceptable behaviour. This agreement will contain the statement that you will never administer physical punishment in any form, or any kind of humiliation or hurtful treatment, and that you endorse discipline through setting positive limits. This of course is exactly the premise of this book and can be successfully achieved using the 3Rs. All the strategies and techniques for managing babies and children outlined earlier in this book (Chapters 1–3) can be successfully adopted by the childminder.

Relative or close friend

A relative or close friend may look after a child or children on an informal daily basis. However, in Britain if anyone cares for a child or children for more than two hours a day for reward he or she must be registered as a childminder. Similar legislation applies in most of Europe and America. Whether you look after a child for one afternoon a week or for a couple of hours each day, you will still be wholly responsible for the child (or children) while they are in your care.

Clearly you will provide a safe and nurturing environment for the child, making sure any garden ponds are covered, stair gates are fitted, etc. if the child is very young. You will also be aware of the child’s likes and dislikes, whether they require assistance going to the toilet, as well as any dietary requirements if the child is to eat with you. You will do all you can to ensure the child is happy and contented during their visit, as well as putting in place any necessary guidelines for acceptable behaviour. Although the arrangement is informal, and done as a favour to the parents, there is no reason why you should have your house wrecked every Thursday evening by the two lads from next door whom you look after so that their mother can attend her art class.

Make sure the children know what is acceptable behaviour in your house and ensure their behaviour is acceptable by following the techniques described in this book. Obviously never use physical punishment on a child you are looking after, and if the child (or children’s) behaviour is very negative then report it to their parents. If the behaviour doesn’t improve, you might decide to withdraw your offer of looking after the children. Often a relative, close friend or neighbour will help out a busy mum so that she can go to the dentist, doctor or shopping unencumbered, but there is a cut-off point to what you can reasonably be expected to do. You are not the parent, and the arrangement should be a risk-free and positive experience for everyone.

Nannies

As a nanny you will be employed by the parents, and will usually look after the child or children in the family home. At present in the UK nannies do not have to be registered or inspected, but they do have childcare qualifications. Nannies clearly work very closely with the parents, and caring for the child or children in the family home gives the child the added security of familiarity – in surroundings and routine. All the techniques and strategies for successfully managing children’s behaviour in this book can be applied to the nanny situation.

Ideally, all aspects of the child or children’s care should be wholly acceptable to both you, the nanny, and the parents, where both parties have the same childcare ideology. However, this isn’t always the case, and sometimes the highly experienced and well-qualified nanny will see flaws in the way parents are rearing their children, particularly in respect of setting boundaries for acceptable behaviour. Ultimately, the nanny may have to accept the parent’s way of doing something, if agreement can’t be reached, although a nanny will never slap a child for bad behaviour even though the parents can legally do so at present in the UK. It can be hoped that if the parents see the nanny successfully setting guidelines for positive behaviour they will follow the nanny’s example. Often parents’ routines and strategies for managing their children are modified after nanny has discreetly set in place something that works better.

CHAPTER EIGHT

Other Factors

Diet

‘We are what we eat’ is a well-acknowledged phrase; the food that goes into our mouths is ultimately absorbed by our bodies and therefore becomes part of us. Food is necessary for cell growth and repair, our development