Chances Come, Ney Mitch [snow like ashes series TXT] 📗

he did abandon me as a prospect long ago. Also, what happens if my partiality for him is the results of a first love, and so I am blinded in that corner? He gave me up once. Therefore, what is to say that he will not do so again? And how can I choose one when they are both such remarkable men? I cannot hurt either one, Lizzy. I would rather die first.”

She began to shake, so I held her as she let her emotion fall out of her body and into the air.

Whenever one cannot possibly give out the correct advice, it is never a good feeling.

Jane eventually wished for time alone, so it was time for me to retreat and go back to my room, where I could write a letter to our mother.

As I did so, I saw Georgiana come up the stairs, bearing letters.

“Miss Elizabeth,” she spoke, still with an air of merriment about her that was the result of the previous night’s festivities. “I come bearing missives.”

“Good news or bad, we now shall see,” I said as she handed me two letters. “Ah, from Mama and Charlotte Lucas. She is a friend of mine.”

“Is she not also the woman who is now my cousin’s companion, and the widow of my aunt’s late parson, Reverend Collins?”

“Yes, the one and the same.” Lowering the letters, I looked ahead, in marvel. “You know, Miss Darcy, now that I come to think on it, our lives are connected in such strange ways. Do you not think so?”

“I have noticed. My aunt has written to my brother, and she says that Charlotte is making an excellent companion for Anne, so your friend must be a charming woman. Or a patient one, to be able to endure the lifestyle of Rosings Park.”

“My friend is not like us,” I said, “she only asks for a comfortable home and security. We are different, and I confess that we desire something else entirely. We are the adventurous sort and are like water. My friend is like the earth.”

I began to open my letter, but then I saw Georgiana looking warily at me from out of the corner of my eye.

“I know that look,” I deduced. “You have something that you wish to ask me.”

“I do indeed. It is an impertinent question, but Miss Elizabeth, I really must ask you. Can we please have a brief discussion in the music room for a moment?”

I breathed in deeply; there shall always be something altogether intimidating about a woman who is related to the man that you are in love with. Yet, my courage returned quickly, and I concurred.

Following her into the music room, I closed the door behind us and sat down with confidence. She did not sit, but looked on me, then looked away, bashful.

“Miss Darcy, I believe that you are getting nervous,” I began, “and that is not needed. You have requested to speak to me about something, and I am willing to hear it.”

“Yes, and you are very kind to do so. However, now that we are here and it comes down to it, I am suddenly frightened and feel as if I have been presumptuous in my manner.”

“If it helps you to unfold yourself to me, then I shall tell you that I shall listen to you with no judgment whatsoever about what you have to say. I know how difficult it is to speak when the subject matter is not commonplace.”

“Thank you.” She paced back and forth for a half minute and then she looked out of the window. “Miss Elizabeth, I love my brother.”

“Yes, I know. You two have a beautiful bond.”

“Yes, and I have seen many women fall in love with him in the past. Yet, very few of them ever saw him when they looked on him… they saw all that they could gain from him. Miss Bingley is among those.”

My eyes widened at this acknowledgement. I had not the slightest notion that Georgiana would have been willing to admit such a thing to me.

“Yes,” I concurred, “she is.”

“And when I met you, I wanted to believe that you were different. Over time, I believed myself to be correct in that wish. Yet, hearing such confirmation is welcome. Therefore, I ask you, and I want the truth. Did you mean all that you said at the ball, when you were speaking with Miss Bingley?”

“She told you about our conversation?” I asked, shocked.

“No, forgive me, but I was standing against a window near you. You both did not see me, because from your angle, the curtain was in the way.”

“Ah. Yes, and that teaches me the lesson of never having such provocative conversations at a ball.”

“I did not mean to overhear.”

“No, I am not chiding you. I am only chiding my own foolishness. Yet, I had rather you heard us than a stranger. That would have been the talk of the ton.”

“Yes,” Georgiana giggled softly, and then she got bashful again.

“Miss Darcy, did any of our conversation give you pain to hear?”

“No. I did not want Miss Bingley as a sister-in-law, and I suspect that you know why.”

I gave her a gentle smile. “Yes, I do. And I daresay that very few women would prefer to have such a fate.”

“Yes. But I wish to speak with you on another matter. Did you mean what you said when you declared that you loved my brother?”

I bit my lip, feeling utterly undone. For to have her know that I spoke it made me feel unraveled and exposed, to the whole world and left without any way of concealment. I was revealed, totally and completely, and I did not know how this all was to end.

“If I was,” I gathered, “then how does that make you feel?”

“Like I said, I was worried about my brother not finding a woman that did not love him in the manner which he loved her. Fitzwilliam is very vulnerable in that way, you