Musing Of A Would Be Hermit, Sixto Ofnine [story reading txt] 📗

Musing Of A Would Be Hermit

Copyright 2022

 

WouldBeHermit.com

 

So hello, I’m the “Would Be Hermit” and these are my Musings. I wrote my first Musing back on 7/22/15 and once I reached 500 plus I decided to put it in this format, mostly cause I could.  I suppose I’ve been Musing all my life, I just never got around to typing it up.  So here are my pointless points about reality or my version of it and let’s see where that takes me shall we.

 

Now you may ask (or not) why am I the “Would Be Hermit?”  Because I decided to be, I’d rather be in a Cabin, In The middle of the Woods, in the middle of nowhere, and have limited contact with people, than live in the real world.  However, in my actual reality I do in fact live in the real world, so it’s only in my dreams that I am a Hermit. So that being said, I’m declaring myself the “Would Be Hermit!”

 

Just how did I arrive at this momentous decision to become the “Would Be Hermit?”  Well, it’s all my fault, since through my choices (good and bad) in life and the career path I’ve inadvertently chosen has placed me in this position.   At my current employer, I deal directly with the public on a daily basis, whether I like it or not, not, mostly because I have a need to eat.  While many of the people I deal with are fine (they understand reality), it’s the ones who have a sense of entitlement, plus the ones that are ignorant and believe yelling and swearing makes them right and conversely makes me wrong, despite the reality of their situation.  These drive me to desire my Cabin In The Woods (that currently only exists in my mind).  So, you (won’t) ask yourself, would I actually move to a Cabin In The Woods, sure, can I afford to, no.  If someone would like to donate me a Cabin, I’ll perhaps take it, but my spouse wouldn’t go.  A GoFundMe page would also work, but again, I’d be moving there alone.  But this writing is more about the actual Musing and not a dream so…

 

 

“Musings #1”

 

I Live in the State of Misery, not really, life is good right now!

 

“Musings #2”

 

Once upon a time I gave a sh.t, but not anymore!  I want my Cabin In The Woods!  Now!!

 

“Musings #3”

 

You can never obtain happiness by making the world bend to your desires, the world will resist.

 

“Musings #4”

 

As Forrest Gump said, “stupid is as stupid does”, and my friend said; you can’t help stupid.

 

“Musings #5”

 

I have a mind like a steel sieve, everything just flows right through it, plus it has a lot of rust and plugged up holes.

 

“Musings #6”

 

There is a bottomless well of stupidity and way too many people partake in drinking from it.

 

“Musings #7”

 

Repeating the same phrase over again and again in an argument doesn’t make you right, it just makes you annoying.

 

“Musings #8”

 

I know just enough to give you my uninformed opinion.  And I will of course believe that I’m right in stating it!

 

“Musings #9”

 

People use political labels to identify a person like, conservative, liberal, libertarianism, dicks, etc.  I don’t really comprehend any of it, I’m just me.

 

“Musings #10”

 

If I make an ass(u)mption that I’m right, you must prove me wrong.  Because to ass(u)me makes an Ass out of U and Me.

 

“Musings #11”

 

I learned something very important today, don’t keep your eye drops with your super glue!  As well as your hemorrhoid cream!

 

"Musings #12”

 

I’m hardly right and mostly wrong so don’t question my judgment!

 

“Musings #13”

 

“Stop making stupid people famous”, as Plastic Jesus, a street artist has stated and spray painted on walls around LA.

 

“Musings #14”

 

“Thank you for your no help.”  Goodly English?  I think not, but a customer did utter these words to me.

 

“Musings #15”

 

I’m in a fog today, how do I know this, I can hear the horn!

 

”Musings #16”

 

Your Ignorance Is Impressive, Please Impress Me Some More!

 

”Musings #17”

 

I know you’re sincere in your beliefs and I’m just as sincere in not caring.

 

”Musings #18”

 

I’m highly unquotable because I’m happy in my ambivalence.

 

”Musings #19”

 

Do you have an opinion that no one asked you to express?  Post an irrelevant comment then!  I always do.

 

”Musings #20”

 

I can write something clever and stupid all at the same time and no one cares, for no one notices.

 

”Musings #21”

 

I’ve been told I’m grammatically incorrect, absolutely!  I’m reinventing the English language.

 

”Musings #22”

 

I’m old or maybe just a little bit short; my 12 year olds shoe size is bigger than mine!

 

”Musings #23”

 

You’re entitled to your opinion, just as I’m entitled to ignore it.

 

”Musings #24”

 

I just write the words down; I don’t understand or comprehend what I’m doing, since I’m a real deep zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz thinker.

 

”Musings #25”

 

I haven’t written anything interesting lately, but when have I ever?

 

”Musings #26”

 

Don’t act before you panic!

 

”Musings #27”

 

The answer is kinda no, way to be decisive.

 

”Musings #28”

 

Had a thought (ouch), with smartphones, you can’t slam the receiver down in anger to hang up, since it doesn’t have one and doing so would break the phone.  I miss that.

 

”Musings #29”

 

You never stop learning; you just stop caring.

 

”Musings #30”

 

Life has given me lemons and boy do they make my face look funny.

 

”Musings #31”

 

It’s very strange when I hear someone in the bathroom stall next to me is toilet texting.  Are they multi-tasking?  Pushing buttons while pushing out shit?

 

”Musings #32”

 

You can’t stop the news, but you can ignore it!

 

”Musings #33”

 

I try not to think; so then I’m not disappointed in my answer.

 

“Musings #34”

 

It’s nice to have a purpose; maybe someday I’ll find it.

 

“Musings #35”

 

What’s your call back number just in case I decide to hang up on you?

 

“Musings #36”

 

You know playing the lottery is like praying to God, the answer is often no.

 

“Musings #37”

 

People like to say “I’m a nervous wreck”, I don’t know about that, I went too many wrecks in my ambulance days and I don’t recall any of them being nervous.

 

“Musings #38”

 

Stop talking in circles, your making me dizzy!

 

“Musings #39”

 

I have exacting standards; they are whatever I come up with at the time.

 

“Musings #40”

 

Give me plenty of misinformation, so I can build up my false hope and make an uninformed decision.

 

“Musings #41”

 

Why do people insist on giving me so much information, which I didn’t ask for, especially when they have a simple yes or no question?

 

“Musings #42”

 

Someone once said to me, “Have a good night”.  What if I don’t want to, what if I want to have a miserable night?

 

“Musings #43”

 

I believe that once I’ve learned something new during the day, then I don’t have to do anything after that.

 

“Musings #44”

 

Why do people insist on calling from the nosiest place they can find and then get all upset when we can’t hear what their saying and have to ask them to repeat themselves?

 

“Musings #45”

 

The only way to beat authority is to become the authority.

 

“Musings #46”

 

They said I think I get it, but after speaking to them, I think they don’t.

 

“Musings #47”

 

I like to hide in my hole at work.  Only leaving to eat and occasionally to use the bathroom (what, I have a trash can).  Hermit in a cubicle perhaps or maybe cubicle hermit?

 

“Musings #48”

 

I dwell on everything and accomplish little.

 

“Musings #49”

 

In the end your authority is only temporary and you may live to regret we ever met.

 

“Musings #50”

 

I’ve retired from doing anything meaningful.

 

“Musings #51”

 

You may be able to pick your friends, but you can’t pick their stupid behavior; that’s up to them.

 

“Musings #52”

 

How sad your sense of superiority must feel, especially when it doesn’t really exist other than in your mind.

 

“Musings #53”

 

I like to think, but maybe I shouldn’t?

 

"Musings #54”

 

Please allow me to complete one thought before we move on to the next one, I don’t multi task.

 

“Musings #55”

 

I’m here to help in any way I feel like.

 

“Musings #56”

 

You’re their type of constituent, the ignorant idiot.

 

“Musings #57”

 

I’m a low end earner and a high end thinker.  This pretty much hasn’t gotten me anywhere.

 

“Musings #58”

 

I have no reason to stay here and no reason to leave, what a strange situation.

 

"Musings #59”

 

As The Would Be Hermit, I don’t quite fit in anywhere, but then I’m ok with that.  For I know and don’t really care.

  

“Musings #60”

 

You can’t impose a friendship on someone, either they want it or they don’t.

 

“Musings #61”

 

With 154,000 miles on my minivan, I no longer sweat the small stuff; it’ll all work out or fall off on its own.

 

“Musings #62”

 

Just because you agree with what someone is saying doesn’t mean either of you have it right.

 

“Musings #63”

 

You make choices in life, sometimes you live to regret them, sometimes you don’t.

 

“Musings #64”

 

If I had a nickel for every time I’ve heard that, then I’d have a nickel.

 

“Musings #65”

 

I have to conserve my energy for more important things like rolling over and going back to sleep.

 

“Musings #66”

 

I’m not an onion, there are no layers.  I’m just not that complicated.

 

“Musings #67”

 

I’ve always like it when the floor in the bathroom is sticky; it just makes me wonder why and with what?

 

“Musings #68”

 

You can leave, or you can LEAVE, your choice.

 

“Musings #69”

 

Bothering a crazy person is like poking a bear, not a good idea.

 

“Musings #70”

 

Frustration of purpose leads to desperate irrationality over common sense.  Look it up.

 

“Musings #71”

 

There is a kernel of truth to everything I write, hopefully.

 

“Musings #72”

 

If you don’t make the attempt to understand something, then you can’t complain about it.

 

"Musings #73”

 

I have all the time in the world that’s left to me.

 

“Musings #74”

 

To live a life in oblivion is a special thing, for you need to be a speck on a speck to accomplish it.

 

“Musings