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my laces. He really was handsome. 

What? Jane, stop it! I scolded myself, throwing in a mental smack for good measure.

"What are you thinking about?" Logan asked softly.

I looked up, and my breath hitched as I found my face inches away from his. I was hypnotized by those eyes. So beautiful. So...stop it!

I swallowed thickly, and the words escaped before I could shove them back down, "I'm checking you out."

I desperately hoped that I sounded sarcastic, or even a little joking. No such luck. His breath caught, and he looked choked for a moment. His eyes blazed as they stared into mine, and I feared for a moment I ruined everything. Finally, he let out a breathless, nervous laugh. I let out a breath of my own and laughed along with him.

He grabbed my hands, making me yelp as he pulled me up. I slid uneasily on my skates, and held onto him for dear life. "Um...I haven't ice skated since I was six...and I've never roller bladed before." I admitted.

He let out a more easy laugh as he steadied me. "Don't worry, I'll show you. Just hold onto the bars for a second while I set something up." He instructed, rolling me over to the wall.

I held on for dear life as he expertly rolled his way to the far corner on the left. He pulled something out of his pocket that I couldn't see, and plugged it in. Briefly, he disappeared into a closet-looking space, and the lights shut off. I let out a squeak, and my heart stopped.

"Logan?" I called nervously.

Suddenly, the lights came back on, but it wasn't the same. Soft pink, purple, and blue swirled around me, circling patterns hitting the mirror and reflecting back onto the floor, the wall, and sometimes on the ceiling at the right angle.

Logan came out with a grin on his face, and turned to the thing he'd plugged in. He messed with it for a few seconds, and suddenly, music began playing throughout the room.

I laughed out loud at the choice as he skated back over to me.

He rolled right into me, stopping himself by the wall on either side of my head.

"Seriously?" I exclaimed despite the close proximity, still laughing, "I thought you hated fifties music! And now you pull my favorite song!"

He chuckled, leaning down to press a kiss to my cheek. "I happen to like Shout." He said.

I let out a yelp as he caught my hands, jerking me out into the open. He held me to him as I lost my balance, keeping us perfectly up, despite only being held up by three wheels on each foot.

Patiently, he began instructing me, and we glided across the floor after a while with little to no incidence.

The song had changed a few times, switching from fifties songs that I recognized, to newer, poppy songs that I recognized, but didn't exactly appreciate.

Never the less, I had tons of fun, laughing as I slipped and slid across the floor with him. Logan seemed to have just as much fun, catching me before I could fall, and teasing me about being the world's clumsiest skater.

Not once did he ask me what happened with Victor. For that I would be eternally grateful.

"So," He started as a slower song came on, pulling me close to him and taking my hand, "What really happened with my sister that hurt you so much?" He asked me, his forehead creasing in concern.

I let out a soft laugh, full of sadness. "She basically told me that my "act" might fool you two, but it wasn't fooling her. She saw how I knew everyone down at the Bay and vice versa, and she said...she said she didn't see why." I looked down at his chest for a moment, biting my lip. When I looked back up at him, my eyes were probably glistening with tears, "Am I really that...unlikable? Does the way I act on the outside really make me seem like a grade A manipulative bitch?" I asked.

At first I thought that dancing in skates was impossible, but Logan easily glided us around the room, slightly lifting me off the ground with one arm.

"Jane, you and I both know the answer to that. No. I've seen who you are under that tough, I-do-what-I-want exterior. You're kind. Sweet as hell. In a lot of ways, you're tough as nails, but in others, you're as soft as a feather pillow. That's what Victor and I love about you, Jane. You're innocent, almost vulnerable when it comes to relationships. You can kick a guy's ass even when he towers three feet above you and has a fifty pound weight advantage. You care about your family more than your own life...and, dare I say it, you're sexy as sin." He grinned charmingly at the last part, and I let out a laugh, hitting him lightly on the chest.

"Thank you, Logan. You have no idea how much better...all of this has made me feel." I gestured around us with the hand that wasn't captured in his, smiling softly at him.

"Anytime, sweetheart." He chuckled.

I wanted to lie my head on his chest. To forget that Victor practically ripped my heart from it's precious crystal throne of happiness, and shattered it with a sledge hammer.

But I couldn't...could I? It wasn't right because...I didn't have feeling for him...right?

Oh no. Don't you dare do this, Jane! I scolded in my mind. You do not have feelings for this man!

......do you? Another, shyer, less listened to part of my brain spoke up. Do you really think that? After feeling butterflies erupt at his simple touch, what you're feeling now? Can you really deny that you're starting to feel something more than just companionship from this man?

I gulped. It was true. His beautiful eyes bored into mine, giving my shoulders and arms goosebumps. His arm was wrapped securely around my waist, and I fit snugly against his muscular form. Butterflies had gathered for a circus performance in my stomach, complete with somersaults. 

No, this was wrong. This was very wrong.

I cleared my throat softly, suddenly terrified of hurting this man. He paused in his intent study of my face, his eyes looking back into mine. "Is there a bathroom somewhere?" I asked him.

Oblivious to the turmoil I was feeling, he smiled slightly and nodded. "Right over there. Here, take off your skates first." He instructed, lowering me to the ground.

He lowered with me, helping me untie the laces and gently slipping them off my feet. He looked up and met my gaze once again. His eyes darted to my lips for a split second, and I barely had time to react as they met mine. It was a very brief, but very, very sweet kiss.

He then lifted us back up, nudging me toward where he gestured to earlier.

I entered the multi-stall bathroom, looking in the mirror at my flushed face.

"You do not have intimate feelings for Logan!" I told myself sternly.

And I watched in horror as my eyebrow twitched upward.

Does it Matter?

 

I awoke to someone brushing the hair from my face, and opened my eyes to meet my mother's. She sat back on the chair she'd pulled up, giving me a small smile. "You two look like a caring family." She murmured.

I looked down at the child in my arms, and then at Victor. Somehow my head had ended up on his shoulder, and his on top of mine. I carefully lifted my head up, letting his head loll back onto the seat.

"He sick?" Mom asked softly.

"Yes." I confirmed, letting her take Harry from me and set him in the recliner across from us.

"Poor dear."

I took his cold, clammy hand in both of mine, warming it. "Yeah. He was miserable last night." I murmured.

She was silent for a moment, watching me take care of Victor. "You know, I have no doubt that Victor is going to ask you to marry him." She murmured.

I sighed heavily, dread weighing my heart down. "I know."

"Are you going to tell him?" She asked me.

I bit my lip, tears pricking at my eyes. "I don't know."

She leaned forward, lying her hand on my knee. "I know you're afraid, honey, but if he really love's you, he won't care." Mom whispered.

"He won't mind in the beginning. But what about years, maybe even months after we're married? He's going to want a family, Mom. He can't have that with me."

Mom sighed heavily. "Honey, you can't condemn yourself for being infertile. That isn't your fault. besides, if you wanted kids that badly, you could adopt." She shrugged.

I looked at Victor. His handsome, but ragged face relaxed with sleep. I had no doubt about how good he was to me, and he'd always surprised me with how tender he was. Every time I expected - wanted him to yell at me, or shake some sense into me, he would pull me into his arms and comfort me with soothing words. What if I lost that, when he found out?

"I can't tell him. Not now." I whispered.

Mom sighed softly and nodded. "I'll go get the soup on."

I gave a smile of thanks to her, shifting out of Victor's grip and standing up. I walked into the kitchen after her, stretching my arms and rubbing my tired eyes.

"Will you keep an eye on the three? I seriously need a shower. I mean it's reaching bio-hazard range." I said.

She let out a laugh and nodded, setting a pot of water of the stove. "Of course."

"Thanks, Mom." I said.

She gave me a wink, and shooed me back into the living room. I grabbed some clothes from the duffel bag, stepping into Victor's room to shower.

I had just finished brushing my teeth and was pulling a brush through my tangled hair, when someone knocked on the door.

I cracked it open, coming face to face with Logan. "Hi. I need to use the bathroom...badly. Ms. Priss has taken a hold of the one upstairs, and she's not going to come out anytime soon."

I laughed and opened the door wider, stepping out so he could step in. I waited a few minutes, lying back on the bed, crossing my legs, and closing my eyes. 

When the door opened, I opened my eyes and turned my head to see Logan, leaning in the doorway. I pushed myself up into a sitting position, and Logan pushed off of the door, coming to stand in front of me.

He helped me up, and grinned down at me. "Thanks."

I smiled back, but was unable to reply as his lips came down on mine. On instinct, my eyes closed. I was stunned, as my arms involuntarily going up to wrap around his neck.

This kiss was urgent, and demanding. Feelings that I'd put to the back of my mind burst through the weak wall with fervor, relishing in his touch. He wrapped his arms around me, pulling me up so I was flush against his chest. All thoughts were gone.

What was more surprising was he was the one to break the kiss. His chest heaved with silent breaths, as he pressed one more kiss to my lips, as if he couldn't get enough.

He let me go, and I dropped to my feet nimbly, despite my surprised state. With one more grin

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