At His Mercies, Marline J [i like reading books txt] 📗

mare, was saddled. Alex jumped up with one quick motion and then held out his hand to me. I looked longingly at the other horses. 

“Can I please ride by myself?” I asked him. 

 “No.” His answer was firm. 

“I promise I won’t ride off.”

 He chuckled. “You couldn’t escape if you wanted to. But no, I want you to ride with me.” Slightly annoyed I took his hand and he helped me onto the horse. It felt good to be on horseback again, the last time had been on the night of my kidnapping. We rode in silence for some time until Alex broke it. 

“Florence, I wanted you to ride with me because then I can do this. He slipped his arm around my waist and then softly kissed my neck.

I giggled. “You’re taking advantage of me!” I accused him. “I can’t exactly go anywhere now so you decide it’s the perfect opportunity to kiss me.”

 “Of course.” Alex laughed. “Any man in his right mind would do the exact same thing.” I had to smile at that compliment.  My breath caught in my throat. The sight before me was more beautiful than anything I had ever seen. Both Alex and I sat on the horse, in awe. The sun was going down behind the mountains and in his departure it had left strokes of purple, pink, yellow and orange in the sky. The colours made the grass on the hills sparkle and look fresh and I felt as if the air I was breathing suddenly became a lot cleaner and more filled with oxygen. I took a deep breath and closed my eyes. Alex had rested his chin on my shoulder and I leaned against him, truly happy for the first time since he had brutally forced me to come with him. So much had changed since that time.  Alex put his hands around my waist and lifted me off the horse. I felt light as a feather in his arms. My mind was also feathery, dancing, high above any worries, any concerns. It was free. Alex took my hand and together we walked to the top of the hill. There, he turned and looked at me. 

“Florence, I have something to say to you. I will no longer keep you here, you are free to go.” I stared up into the smouldering depths of his eyes. Did he mean this? Was I really free? I could go home to my comfortable bed and the bountiful dinners and warm baths. I could see my father and my mother and my siblings again. Why wasn’t I overjoyed? Something was nagging on me and apparently Alex saw it too because he lifted a finger to straighten a crease between my eyebrows. 

“What’s wrong?” He asked.

 “Nothing, I just..” I looked away from him, at the sun which was slowly dropping behind the mountains. I bit my lower lip and then looked back at Alex. 

 “I’m going to miss you.” I said to him. I could not believe I had just said that but I was sure that I had meant it. I was going to miss him. More than I was going to admit.  He smiled and I couldn’t keep my eyes off him. He looked so incredibly handsome in the fading light.  He stroked his hand over my cheek.

“I’m going to miss you too.”  Then, he leaned down and his lips touched mine. All the senses in my body were instantly jolted awake. The feeling spread from my lips to my fingertips to my toes and it was as if electricity was trapped inside my body, reeling around, putting all my nerves on edge. My heart exploded into a frenzied beat and I felt my blood rush in my ears. I never knew anybody could have so much power over me. He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me closer. My hands were tangled in his hair and our lips moved together so perfect, so wonderfully that I forgot everything around me.  He pulled away and leaned his forehead against mine. We were both short of breath and we both refused to let go of one another. I closed my eyes and enjoyed the moment, knowing that the future might never be this perfect again. 

“I love you.” Alex whispered. I looked into his eyes, shocked at his revelation. Did he really love me? Was it possible that this rough, handsome kidnapper was in love with me? I just simply stared at him for a few seconds, suddenly realizing that I loved him too. I loved him. So that’s what the wonderful feeling had been that had lightened up my days and randomly put a smile on my face. It was love. 

 “I love you too.” I told Alex. 

 

I woke up in his arms, like I had done for the past couple of weeks. But this time he hadn’t forced me to lie in his arms, I had willingly crawled into them. 

“I don’t want to go home yet, Alex. I want to stay here a little longer.” I looked at him to see what his reaction would be. 

“Good!” He smiled broadly. “Because you are a far better kisser than the previous girls. And you certainly are a lot more fun.” I sat up and analyzed his face. Was he serious? 

“What do you mean, the other girls?” I asked suspiciously. 

 “Well, when I wanted to kiss the other girls, they instantly gave in. You were much more fun to be with because it was a struggle to get to your heart. I felt very victorious when you finally gave in to my charms.” First I felt my heart crack and then, after a few seconds, shatter into a million pieces. And I felt so incredibly angry. Being heart-broken and furious at the same time is not a good combination. I wanted to claw his eyes out, I wanted to tie him up and slap him until he screamed in pain, I wanted to pinch him and roast him over an open fire, I wanted to.. There were so many horrible options floating through my mind that I was surprised at my own cruelty. But I knew I could do none of these things and one slap would not be enough satisfaction. Instead I vowed not to let him know how hurt I was. I smiled at him, though I knew my smile was incredibly fake, and then stood up. 

 “Well, I guess I change my mind then. I want to go home after all.” I could not believe how composed I was. I didn’t even know I possessed such good acting skills. But what I did know was that if I didn’t get away from Alex soon, I would burst into tears and I would not be able to stop crying.  Suddenly, the realization dawned on me that we would have to ride back on the same horse. Without thinking it over I told Alex;

“Either I ride and you walk or you ride and I walk but I am not getting on that horse with you.” He nodded gravely. Somehow, he didn’t seem too happy either. I thought he would delight in the fact that he had broken my heart but his expression told me that he definitely wasn’t. I was not about to feel sorry for him though. 

“You can ride, and I’ll walk.” Alex offered.

“Oh, how nice of you.” Sarcasm was dripping from my words. I was happy that for the time being, anger was my strongest emotion. I knew though, that this would change the moment Alex was out of my sight. I walked over to the horse and mounted it. Then I turned the horse around and led it in the direction which I thought we had come from. 

 “Florence!” Alex called after me. “You’re going the wrong way!” As if my shame wasn’t big enough already. I turned the horse around again and saw that Alex was already going in the opposite direction. I kicked the horse softly and it responded to my order immediately. I refused to ride next to Alex though, and always kept a few paces behind him. I wish I could gallop off into the forest and forget about this nightmare but I wasn’t in the mood for being dreadfully lost. I was happy that I wasn’t completely irrational. I had heard, and read, that heart-broken people sometimes did very stupid things. Or was it only people in love who did stupid things? Maybe both. Love apparently inspired people to become brain-dead. Why on earth had I ever surrendered to it? ’It hadn’t been my choice.’ I reminded myself. ‘I tried fighting love in the beginning and what good did that do me? Nothing. I had still fallen in love.’ Love was starting to confuse me and besides, I was sick of the word. 

The end of the Adventure. Or the beginning?

 

We arrived back at camp and the only thing I wanted was to be on my way out of here. I had nothing to pack because my only possessions were the clothes I was wearing. Alex had walked over to one of his men and exchanged a few words with him. Then he walked back to me. 

 “Jack is one of my most trusted men, he won’t hurt you. “ Alex told me. 

“Oh, I don’t mind if he hurts me, I can’t be hurt anymore than I already am anyways.” I hadn’t intended to give Alex the satisfaction of knowing what he had done to my heart. I couldn’t help myself though, I had to make Alex feel bad in some way or another. A look of intense sadness suddenly crossed over his face and again I wondered if maybe Alex felt something for me too. Jack was saddling one of the other horses and this gave me time to glance around the place where I had been kept prisoner for around a month. Many of the faces had started to become familiar and I wondered what I would feel when I thought back about these past few weeks. Would I remember the happy moments? The warm, wonderful feeling that had spread through me when Alex had touched and kissed me? The beautiful sunset? Or would I remember the sad and unhappy moments, the moment when Alex had first kidnapped me, when I first found out who Ralph was and when Alex had broken my heart? I didn’t have time to analyze further because Jack rode over to me. 

“Are you ready?” He asked.  I nodded. 

“Bye.” Alex said flatly. He didn’t sound happy or sad, his voice held no emotion at all. I just looked at him for a few seconds, unable to decide whether my ‘bye’ should sound sad, or careless, or like his, emotionless. I eventually decided not to say anything at all, it seemed like the best option. 

 

“Ms. Patson, slow down, you’re pushing your horse too hard!” I heard Jack call behind me. We had been galloping for nearly half an hour now and I became aware that my horse was wheezing. I instantly slowed down to a trot and then to a steady walk. Jack pulled up next to me.

“You’re in quite a hurry to get home, aren’t you?” He asked me, with a knowing smile.  I was