Love Comes Knocking, Kathy Cakebread [top novels of all time txt] 📗

one else can see that they’re not worth the ground they stand on are they…” she whispered, her voice inches from Ben’s ears.

They say the eyes are the insight to the soul and at that moment Ben’s certainly were. His feelings of fatness washed over him as such a genuine; heart given comment took their place. A grateful smile engulfed his face, beaming at the benefactor of happiness. She smiled back; suddenly aware her lips were inches from his. As the tension increased Lola remembered her duty, backed off suddenly from a flabbergasted Ben.
“Hey I really think it is time to go now, yeah. I hope you’re okay now but I’ll probably lose my job if we don’t get out of here soon.”
“Okay, thanks. For everything.” Ben muttered.
“Anytime.” She grinned.
That night, that near kiss… it paved the slave for everything.


11. LaLa Lola

Dappled rays of sunlight filtered through the crack in the curtains, illuminating the sleeping form in the bed. Stuck in a half conscious, half unconscious state of mind Ben felt himself drift in and out of sleep, every time he felt like he was falling, falling into a state of oblivion he had no idea how to get out of, and every time he woke just before his fate could be realised as a hand, a slender, female hand became his saviour. Whose hand was it? Who was offering him this chance of salvation? Feeling his stomach jerk once more he knew he was falling, felt the sharp wind at his skin pinching as the depths grew wider, his eyes saw nothing but the morbid blankness till once again a hand, then a body then a… gasping he sat bolt upright in bed. Now he’d never know who the mysterious alias was.

As his heart gradually slowed down to a gentle beat he glanced around the room, saw nothing but Barney, swimming nonchalantly around his little tank, air bubbles piercing the picture perfect image. He waited till his heart stopped hammering before attempting to pull back the twisted covers, his muscles aching from his strenuous workout the night before. Staggering into the shower he let the warm flows of water wash the aches away, rubbing at the joints gingerly with his fingers he thought over the previous evening, remembered how close her face had been to his, the way she had looked at him. So why did she pull away? Did she like him or not? He didn’t really know but the truth was she had the chance to kiss him and she didn’t so obviously it was all a mistake, no surprises there then. Sighing Ben languished in the last few seconds of the warming spray before getting ready for work.

Exhausted from a frantic, busy morning Ben wound down for his lunch break. Glancing over at José he caught his eye, nodded at the chrome timepiece on the wall.
“You ready for lunch mate?”
Jose swiped at his brow.
“Just about.” He grinned.
Grabbing their jackets from the back room the two men headed towards the local pub, an image of a cool, refreshing beer languishing seductively in their minds eye. Work might not have been finished yet but one beer wouldn’t hurt, and Ben for one was in serious need of a relaxant, a tasty beverage that would relax his languid body, unleash the confusing, mixed up images of the night before that he was dying to be rid of, yet didn’t know how.
“Soo…” Jose started, coming back with two pints of Guinness.
Ben looked up, noted the inquisitive look on his friend’s face.
“What happened to you yesterday? You didn’t turn up for the evening shift or lockdown, you was lucky I was there or your shop would’ve been a free house for all the local thieves round these parts.”
A sheepish look crossed Ben’s face.
“Sorry…” he paused suddenly, as if deep in thought. “I just felt so down after that Francesca debacle that I spent all evening and night in the gym, I had to try and get rid of the fat that seems to describe my whole person.”
Jose shook his head, his eyes sad. Why did Ben think being overweight made a huge impact on people’s opinion of him? If they thought any less of him as a person just because of that they’re hardly worth knowing in the first place. If only he could see that. Noting the knowing look on Jose’s face Ben took a long gulp of his beer, felt the images of last night regurgitate themselves on his tongue.
“She was going to kiss me, I know she was. But she didn’t, she stopped, why?!” Ben muttered; his voice strained.
His eyebrows rising in shock José gasped in disbelief and puzzlement.
“Who? Francesca?”
“No. The gym receptionist… Lola…”
His face aghast, his eyes wide and staring Jose’s whole demeanour screamed for an explanation.
“Wow… you certainly made an impact on her then hey Ben!” Jose gasped.
“I don’t know… I don’t understand it myself, how it happened, it just did. I keep going over it in my mind and seeing her face inches from mine, her lips even closer and I’m thinking WHY? Why did it happen… but most of all… why didn’t she kiss me?” He trailed off, his voice sad.

Dipping his finger in his beer he traced his finger around the rim, his eyes down set and confused. Jose smiled, reached out for his friend, placing a friendly hand on his shoulder.
“Here it can only be a good thing you two coming so close to kissing. It doesn’t matter that she pulled away; maybe she just felt it was a wrong moment, you were upset and she didn’t want to take advantage. It’s nothing at all to do with you being hideous and her feeling sorry for you.”
His mood lifting with Jose’s words of optimism, Ben smiled and looked away from the beer.
“You know you are so right! I’m going to get out there and make the first move! Just you watch this space, this time tomorrow I’ll no longer be a single man!” Ben crowed triumphantly.

His once relinquished human spirit shining once more he downed his pint and threw back his chair, heading for the door. Jose stared bewilderingly at his friend’s rapidly retreated figure. How on earth had he gone from doom and gloom to ecstatic and happy in ten seconds flat? It didn’t seem human. Realising he was unaware of the new and improved Ben’s intentions Jose grabbed his coat and followed in Ben’s wake.

His eyes sweeping the length of the narrow, tightly packed street Jose found his gaze settling on the large, gaily swaying figure in the distance.
“Hey Ben… Ben wait!!” Jose yelled, projecting his voice in front of him.
Aware of his name being called Ben stopped in his tracks, turned around and squinted curiously at the rapidly approaching Jose.
“Hello my friend.” Ben said happily.
“What may I do you for?”
His overly joyful mood was as mystifying as it was pleasant.
“I was just wondering where you were off to so suddenly… and in such a lovely mood, when ten minutes ago you were on the brink of depression!” Jose said.
Ben winked.
“Ah, yes, well I heard what you were saying and realised you were so right. Why would Lola get so close to kissing me if she didn’t actually want to? Obviously like you said she was scared of making the first move so I thought if I do it then she’s got nothing to fear has she!”
Jose nodded hesitantly.
“Yeah sure but I don’t know, you’re not going to do anything silly now are you?”
Pulling his friend into a huge bear hug Ben pulled back and grinned, an impish look imprinted on his face.
“You know me Jose.”
“Yes only too well and I also know your relationship history. Ben if you and her have any future you don’t want to be going and scaring the poor girl off!” Jose insisted.
“Oh nonsense. She likes me and I’m just going to show her I like her, and I don’t care what you say, I’m going. Ta-ra.”
Furious at Jose’s pathetic attempts at reasoning Ben turned his back and stormed off into the distance. Whilst he had always managed to retain dignity and pride from shattered dreams of love, Fran’s betrayal of the one thing he had ever wanted – family - had really jeopardised any further chances of happiness. But now he had a hope, a tiny shining light in the distance that could soon be dazzling if only he let it. Lola was different, he knew she was and he was going to do everything in his power to show her this. Realising that you can only really learn from your mistakes Jose remained where he stood, hoping with all his being that this time it really wouldn’t be a mistake. He would truly hate trying to salvage the few remaining slivers of Ben’s broken heart…


12. Hope Blooms

Clutching a bouquet of white roses as pure as they were symbolic Ben walked towards the entrance of the leisure centre. He hadn’t quite worked out the mechanics of his plan or how he would approach her but he knew as soon as he stepped inside it would come to him. As natural as a bird in flight... or so he thought. Alone in his thoughts he felt the first flutters of anxiety seeping into his stomach, the overwhelming sensation of panic intensified by his pounding heart. His terror increasing he felt his courage dwindling his body consumed by the ravishing effect of fear. He knew he had to fight this; he couldn’t let being scared of what might happen scare him off romance for life. If he did that he’d end up a lonely old man with ten cats. That version of a future to him was a fate worse then death. Finding a bench he sat down took several deep breaths and slowly regained his self-control.

Calm and placid he felt himself drifting his mind consumed with thoughts of Lola and the feeling of her breath playing off his neck. As he daydreamed his self-conscious revived thoughts of the past, corrupting his sense of mental conviction as it replayed moments of humiliation, embarrassment and pain. The images taunted him, reminded him of just how much a fool he was when it came to love, it was almost telling him to give up, give up or you’ll just inflict pain on yourself over and over again. The voice of his sub-conscious was strong but his heart was stronger. He knew what he wanted and he knew nothing would stop him getting it. If people just gave up after a little knock or break people lives would just be lying in tatters. No fighter gives up on his or her dream, not when it consumes them, gives them their sole reason for living and moving on. Ben was a fighter and he knew what he had to do. Picking up the flowers he smiled and stepped towards the centre, his panic all having disappeared.
“Lola… hi.” Ben grinned nervously, hiding the flowers behind his back.

Glancing up from a pile of paperwork Lola smiled breezily at Ben, her face vacant of any awkwardness. Even in the gaudy fluorescent lights her skin remained a creamy honey colour, seemingly devoid of any post-adolescent spots or scars. Her deep blue eyes set against a background of gold eye shadow had the magnitude of an ocean, its depths unending and soul immortal.
“Hi, how can I help you?” she said smoothly.
Stepping up to