How to Talk to Anyone (Junior Talker #1), DeYtH Banger [mobi reader .TXT] 📗
- Author: DeYtH Banger
Book online «How to Talk to Anyone (Junior Talker #1), DeYtH Banger [mobi reader .TXT] 📗». Author DeYtH Banger
If the answer to these questions is “no”, then how long do you want to keep waiting for the things you’ve been doing to make you happy? If you keep doing the same things you’ve been doing to make yourself happy, you will keep getting the same results. There’s nothing wrong with any of these things we do to make ourselves happy. They give us some wonderful moments of happiness, and they can help make us happier than we were. But does it give you the lasting happiness and fulfillment that you want?
You don’t have to live life with anxiety, worry, shame, & lack
Regardless of whether you consider yourself generally happy or unhappy, you don’t have to live life with anxiety about the future, worrying about what others think, feeling resentful or sad about past events, angry at others, or feeling ashamed and incomplete. That’s not our natural state.
The reason you don’t feel free, whole, and happy isn’t because you aren’t good enough, it isn’t because you are missing something, it isn’t because you haven’t achieved your goals, it isn’t because you are unworthy, and it isn’t because you don’t have the “perfect” circumstances.
To discover how to feel happy, you first have to understand what is causing your unhappiness
How to feel happy? Imagine that you just sat down in a chair, and as soon as you sat down, you felt a pain in your back. But you don’t want to be in pain. You want to feel comfortable. So you ask yourself, “How can I make myself comfortable?”. Once you ask this question, the next logical question you would ask yourself is “What is causing the pain in my back?” You would instinctively know that in order to feel comfortable, you have to identify the cause of your pain, and then fix this issue.
The same is true with happiness. The answer to the question of “How to feel happy?” is to identify and address the cause of your unhappiness. So if you want to be happy, the most important question to ask yourself is “What is causing my unhappiness?” Then you might discover that it is actually your thoughts that have been making you unhappy. If you don’t understand what’s making you unhappy, then you can’t address it. The cause of our unwanted emotions is not the circumstances in our lives, but actually our thoughts about everything in our lives.
Don’t believe what I say about how to feel happy
How to feel happy? I don’t want you to believe me that your thoughts are the cause of your unhappiness. Please don’t believe me. What I speak about isn’t theory, it isn’t philosophy, and it isn’t meant to be believed. Everything I speak about is meant to be directly experienced. Therefore, I want you to directly discover everything for yourself.
An exercise to help you discover the cause of your unhappiness
Let’s first take a look at what you think about your current emotional state, and why you think you’re unhappy. Please answer the following questions:
Are you unhappy? Are you suffering with anxiety, fear, worry, anger, sadness, guilt, shame, depression, or hurt? If so, what do you think is causing your unhappiness? (i.e. something about yourself is “bad”, your situation is “bad”, or the people in your life is “bad”) What do you do for fun? Do you have anything that you really love doing? For example, You may go dancing, play sports, socialize, go to concerts, listen to music, eat food you love, eat desserts, watch tv, or play with your kids. Are you able to enjoy yourself, be happy, or have fun while participating in your favorite hobby, doing your favorite activity, or eating your favorite food? In the moments that you are participating in your favorite hobby, and you are happy, does the “bad” aspect of yourself, your situation, or the people in your life still exist? If so, why are you able to stop experiencing your unhappiness and have fun (be happy) just by entertaining yourself?This happens simply because entertainment distracts you from the negative thoughts that are actually creating your suffering. If a “bad” circumstance in your life created your unhappiness, then as long as that “bad” circumstance still existed, you wouldn’t be able to escape that unhappiness.
Are you ready to change your approach for how to feel happy?
What do you do to try to make yourself happy? Has it fulfilled you and given you peace? Has it stopped you from feeling anger, anxiety, worry, shame, and incompleteness?
The 2 major steps for how to feel happy
There are a variety of different emotions that we each experience that keep us from being happy. In addition, each of us has a different belief about what we think is causing our unwanted emotions. For example, we may believe that our suffering is created by our: physical pain, physical attributes, personality, house, car, job, spouse, children, or certain unwanted events.
Since there are many different emotions, and many different apparent causes our emotions, I have created 6 different ways to help you discover for yourself that your unhappiness and unwanted emotions are actually created by your thoughts and not by your circumstances. Once you discover that your unwanted emotion is created by thoughts, you then need to address these thoughts. The way to do that is by disbelieving those thoughts. When you stop believing a thought that is creating an unwanted emotion for you, that emotion will instantly dissolve.If you would like to try dissolving one of your unwanted emotions right now, you can click here to go through my free web app called “The 5 Steps”. Alternatively, if you would like to check out the 1st exercise (it’s a blog post) to help you discover for yourself that your unwanted emotions are actually created by thoughts, please click the blue text image below:
You can be happy now
If your unhappiness is only created by thoughts, that is wonderful news because that means that you don’t need to change anything about yourself, your circumstances, or the people in your life to make yourself happy. When you change yourself, your circumstances, or the people in your life to become happy, you aren’t addressing the actual cause of your unhappiness. If you don’t need to change all of these things to be happy, that means you can be happy now. The only thing you have to do is eliminate/address the thoughts that make you unhappy.
Gratitude:
In this video blog post, I will be talking about the inherent gratitude of the present moment. To start out, I would like to ask you a question:
Have you ever found yourself in a wonderful situation, but you still ended up thinking about what was missing or how the situation could be “better”? This is an incredibly common experience. We may have a great job, wealth, a lovely partner, and amazing children, but almost all of our attention is still given to thoughts about what we want to improve. We may be looking at a beautiful view and instead of just enjoying it, we often end up thinking, “This would be perfect if… my soul mate was here, it was sunnier, or I had my camera”. We may have a wonderful partner, and instead of recognizing that, we focus on how she can improve. Our minds are too busy thinking about what isn’t “good enough” in our lives or what “could be better” to be grateful and appreciative of what we have. This is typically the case even when we can admit our lives are wonderful.
Why you don’t experience gratitude in any moment?
The only reason we don’t experience gratitude in our situations in life is because a thought arises in our mind that says “something isn’t good enough”. Once we believe this thought, it creates a sense of lack or insufficiency, and that feeling makes us want to change or “improve” our circumstances in order to try and make ourselves happy. Then we naturally start thinking about how to change our circumstances. This is the continuous cycle in our lives.
Why we experience gratitude?
In any moment that we don’t have or believe our thoughts that say, “Something isn’t good enough”, what inherently remains is gratitude for what we have. Strangely enough, this is the experience we generally hope to achieve by trying to make life match our concept of “perfect”.
Gratitude is inherently part of every moment that we don’t believe a thought claiming “something isn’t good enough”. Our circumstances don’t need to match our idea of “perfect” for us to have gratitude. Gratitude is an innate and natural part of our existence when we aren’t giving attention to thoughts.
Positive thoughts aren’t enough to feel the fulfillment true gratitude!
Many of us try to force ourselves to think positive thoughts in order to experience gratitude. That’s fine. But this isn’t true gratitude. It doesn’t have the same fulfilling quality. This is because these positive affirmations of “I am great!”, “My situation is wonderful!”, “I am so lucky to have my partner!”, are almost always just a layer of superficial positive thoughts placed on top of strong beliefs that you aren’t great, your situation isn’t good enough, and you wished your partner was different. Therefore, you will not experience real gratitude from just thinking something positive.
Note: Rejection... doesn't matter... it shouldn't reflect you... too much... "No" is "Yes" Somewhere in the middle
Mistaking Love:
In this blog post, I would like to talk about the 7 things that we mistake to be love. We were all taught many different concepts about what love is, but many of these things are not actually love at all. When we think we are loving someone, but we’re not actually loving them, then we aren’t going to feel that love. We aren’t going to experience fulfillment. Yet, the fulfillment we are looking for in life really comes from giving love, and not from receiving love.
The content in this post is meant to help make you aware of when you are mistaking your thoughts, words, actions, and feelings to be love… because this will give you the opportunity to come back to love.
What is love?
Before we start talking about what love is, I would just like to briefly discuss the 3 main qualities of what love is:
Love is complete acceptance – We don’t see anything about the person to be insufficient or not good enough. Love is completely unconditional – Our love can’t be affected or lost based on words and actions Love is completely selfless – Love doesn’t need or want anything in returnHere are the 7 things we mistake to be love:1) Pursuing someone to love us revolves around finding someone to use
Most of us go through life seeking someone to love us. But why are we seeking this? Why do we continuously look for a partner or someone to love us? Really, what we want more than anything else is to feel peaceful, happy, and whole. We just happen to believe (often unknowingly) that if we got someone to really and truly love us, that would make us feel happy and whole.
Basically, we create a vision of the “perfect” future where we are loved and happy, and then
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