How to Talk to Anyone (Junior Talker #1), DeYtH Banger [mobi reader .TXT] 📗
- Author: DeYtH Banger
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According to a Harvard Psychologist, People Judge You Based on Two Criteria
Judging people is less a conscious choice and more an instinct. No shame, we all do it. But when you're being judged, or you're the one doing the judging, the stain on your shirt isn't the deal maker or breaker. (Relax, no one even notices the tiny things you freak out over, anyway.) According to a Harvard psychologist, people judge you based on two criteria. Are you making your best impression?
In Warmth We Trust
Harvard Business School professor Amy Cuddy is an expert in first impressions, having researched that split-second interaction with fellow psychologists Susan Fiske and Peter Glick for more than 15 years. In her best-selling book "Presence: Bringing Your Boldest Self to Your Biggest Challenges," Cuddy spells out two questions you'll immediately ask yourself — and answer — upon meeting someone new:
Can I trust this person? Can I respect this person?
In psychologist speak, asking yourself those questions is a way to gauge a person's warmth and competence, respectively. The goal is for someone to answer two resounding yeses to those inquiries. But, according to Cuddy, people usually think competence is the more important factor, especially in a workplace setting. Not so fast — it's better to nail the warmth before business acumen. "From an evolutionary perspective," Cuddy writes, "it is more crucial to our survival to know whether a person deserves our trust."
Consider a coworker who is great at his job but cold as ice around the office. That's off-putting, right? "If someone you're trying to influence doesn't trust you, you're not going to get very far; in fact, you might even elicit suspicion because you come across as manipulative," writes Cuddy. "A warm, trustworthy person who is also strong elicits admiration, but only after you've established trust does your strength become a gift rather than a threat."
Is There Something on My Face?
Then there's the physical judgment, the "judging a book by its cover" bit. Unless you're Morgan Freeman, nothing about your physical appearance can really compel someone to inherently trust or respect you. (People sure like to try, though.)
According to a 2017 study by psychologist Leslie Zebrowitz of Brandeis University, people judge your face by analyzing four facial cues. They are babyfacedness, familiarity, fitness, and emotional resemblance. Some of these factors you can't help, but you can boost your "emotional resemblance" score by at least turning up the edges of your mouth a little bit. And whaddya know, a little warmth in your expression could cross over into your projection of trustworthiness.
Chapter 4 - How to Talk (Part 1)
1) Stop Thinking
2) Stop Holding for later
3) Stop Over Thinking
4) Stop Logic
If you want succeed in talking to anyone (at this moment it's normal to fail in getting solid contacts but still it's a good strike.)… you should stop acting as how somebody else is going to see you.
…
1) - The real thing about this whole point is to stop thinking… just go and do it….
As Patric James From #RawAdvice YouTube channel said:
- First the left leg… then the right and DO IT!
2) If you say now isn't the time/the day/the moment you are one FUCKING son of a bitch.
- Because this excuse is type of procrastination,
By itself later is not tomorrow or the other tomorrow it's a non specific time aka to be more accurate it's answer: Never
3) - Over thinking is hell of a ride if you start thonking over and over the sentence loses it's impact plus you start questioning yourself.
"Am I good enough?"
"Is it good enough?"
"Should I do it now?"
"Should I do it later?"
"What now? What next?"
4) Stopping logic is a smart move
- Most logic questions are so FUCKING boring and you always gonna make the discussion overrated… putting women on pedestal. It's horrible move.
Chapter 4.1 - How to Talk (Part 2)
What you need at this time is a calm mind… if your brain is filled with filters and even whole level of screenplay/s….
Just clean it up!
Just clean up!
Just clean it up!
Just clean it up!
Just clean up!
Just clean it up!
Just clean it up!
Just clean up!
Just clean it up!
You can do it by going to a silent place and silent this thoughts.
Ask yourself questions like
"And"
"Why"
…
This is going to destroy the loop
…
"And" is going to create something like a "I don't care so what?"
….
"Why" is going to deepen the whole thing… probably down there… all this thoughts are going to go in the trash.
…
Good exercises are:
1) Breathing method
- BrEaTh in…. Slowly then out… in… out
2) Comfort Zone Crusher
- Go in a Mall or in a busy street and lay down… for 30 seconds… be calm and take picture then… stand up and continue what you are normally going to do.
“If you have an important point to make, don't try to be subtle or clever. Use a pile driver. Hit the point once. Then come back and hit it again. Then hit it a third time - a tremendous whack.”
― Winston S. Churchill
“Naked lions are just as dangerous as elegantly dressed ones”
― Susan Cain, Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking
“A speaker should approach his preparation not by what he wants to say, but by what he wants to learn.”
― Todd Stocker
Chapter 1 - Learn
1) It's time to learn to walk
- You learn that... by stepping into a boring conversation... you got how to do it
2) Then you got in some rough material
- It's going to come more from that place
“Communication without clarity is noise. Speak with purpose and you’ll propel your audience to take massive action towards a journey of self-improvement.”
― Farshad Asl
Chapter 1.1 - Challenge
“It's much easier to pull in an audience by framing the talk as an attempt to solve an intriguing riddle rather than as a plea for them to care. The first feels like a gift being offered. The second feels like an ask.”
― Chris Andersen
Get comfortable in this social groups by starting a challenge which is
1) Go in social place and lay down...
for 30 seconds
Take a snap and then continue your day
Chapter 2 - Social BarrierWe always create some barriers which stop us from progress the best barriers as the self-image one.
then putting the world like
and putting all this people in a group
Sociable THe best The most famous
And we
Miserable Fucked up Screw Up less SOciable
...
And labeling and putting down this barriers stops you from progress...
...
The best thing which you can do is... forget about this beliefs... try to give less fuck about them.
...
JUst stop
Over Analysing Over OBsessing oVer Thinking OVer Self-Criticising Over self- Hatred
or whatever you call it
this whole process
JUST STOP!
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