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morning.”

I stood up and walked to the door, with him following at my heels, he was getting ready to leave when he leaned close to me and hugged me. “can’t wait.” Then he walked out the door, and shut it behind him.

I walked into my room and laid on my bed, with only Aiden on my mind.

Lukas<3
I had been calling Andi all of yesterday and she hadn’t answered her phone once. I guess I would have to wait until I seen her later today.

Me and Karli were sitting on the stairs, we were talking about hanging out after school. When my breath was knocked out of me; by the sight in front of me. Andi and Aiden holding hands. What the fuck! Aiden was supposed to be my friend!

I let go of Karli’s hand and walked over to Andi and Aiden. I glanced over at Aiden before looking at Andi. “Hey Andi, I have been calling you.”

She looked over at Aiden. “Luke, how could you cheat on Andi!? You have no idea what you just lost! She deserves so much better than you.”

I was thrown backwards by the force of his words. “it was a mistake Aiden.”

“Luke that’s always been your excuse, but I am tired of hearing it. You were like this when you were younger and I thought that you would mature and stop cheating, but if anything you got worse. I fucking hate you Luke.” he got closer and whispered in my ear “I will do everything I can to make sure, you never hold her in your arms again.” He said through clenched teeth. He tightened his grip on Andi’s hand and pulled her off in to the other direction. I stared after them.

She sat on the ground and started to cry. I wish I could walk over and hug her, and hold her tight…. And beg her not to cry. But Aiden was there and he was doing just that.

He sat down beside her and held her tight. His lips were moving but I don’t know If he was saying something, or cursing my name. who knows it could be both. My heart cracked when he leaned down and kissed her forehead, and she smiled.

He pulled her up and wrapped his arm around her waist, and they walked right past me and in to the school.

“Andi, I’m sorry.. I hope I didn’t take that to far.” I could hear him speaking in the difference. I was rounding the corner of the hall towards her locker when I seen them standing there. She had dried tears still streaking her face and he had a dumb look on his face, that made me want to punch him. Fuck if he kept this up I was going to kick his ass. I thought he was my friend. Dumb ass me, getting stabbed in the back again. Fuck!! He knew I was still in love with Andi.

I turned the corner and I seen him kiss her. she didn’t push him away; instead she kissed him back. I felt pathetic; I could feel the tears escaping and there was nothing stopping them. I darted in to the bathroom, and punched the mirror until there was a big crack in to it. I was still pissed. I started punching the mirror again. Until it finally shattered. My knuckles were bleeding and the glass was clattering on to the floor. There were red pieces, those were the ones coated with my blood. My tears were dripping and mixing with my blood.

I picked up a piece of glass and dug it in to my arm. Fuck life! Fuck life! Fucking kill me!

The bathroom door creaked open and Mr. Dovil was standing in the doorway with shock and disbelief in his eyes. He ran over to me. “Luke! what happened?” he put his hands on shoulder.

I pushed him away. “nothing Mr. Dovil. Don’t tell anyone what you just saw, just forget about it.” I pushed past him; I stepped out of the bathroom and seen the crowd staring back at me. no one cared, not one of them was upset. Well that’s what I thought until I seen Andi crying in front of her locker.

Keep walking Luke, I told myself. Keep walking. But my feet directed me towards her. I leaned on her neighbors locker and slide down it, until I landed on the floor. “hi.”

She grabbed my arm and looked up at me with tears in her eyes. “why would you do that Luke? Why? You broke that promise that we made…” her tears kept coming faster and faster.

“You broke your promise to.”
She jerked backwards and hit her back off the locker. “What are you talking about?” she sniffled, trying to hold back her tears.

“you promised me, no matter what happened… You would never stop loving me.”

She looked beside her. “I didn’t break that promise…. I don’t get it… Your allowed to date Karli and kiss her and hug her as much as you want… But when I want to date someone, I’m not allowed… or I kiss someone you go and cut yourself, …. I just don’t understand why.”

I slid closer to her. “That’s because I am afraid, that as soon as you start dating someone else, you’ll realize how un worthy I am.”

She wiped away her tears and stood up. “it doesn’t matter Luke. I’m always going to love you…. But if your going to be with Karli… I am going to date other people to… I am not going to sit here my entire life as you hold her in your arms every night…. And wait for the day when you realize that you would rather have me in your arms….. I’m sorry…” she walked away as soon as Aiden was coming around the corner.

He grabbed her hand and they walked off towards the door. I guess they were skipping class today.

Aiden looked back and me and glared. I knew that was her way of saying she was dating Aiden, and that was his way of warning me to back the fuck off.

I watched as my “friend” walked away with the girl I was in love with. Ya that’s one hell of a friend. I started to cry again. Why did it have to happen this way? Why can’t that be me who’s holding Andi’s hand? Who kisses her all the time? Why can’t I be that one…?

I sat there and just cried until school was finally over. As soon as the last bell rang I ran out the door. I wanted to get as far from here as I possibly could. As I was sure I would see andi and Aiden soon.

Go fucking figure. He was holding her hand. They stopped at the wall where we used to sit. Aiden touched her nose and she laughed. Man I don’t know if it was because that was Aiden and not me, but when I seen that I was about to upchuck. I was walking a short distance behind them. Andi turned around and smiled at me, I could see tears starting to build up in her eyes.

She let go of Aiden’s hand and hugged him, before exciting the school grounds. I was walking behind her slowly. I didn’t want her to think I was following her.

I started to cry. Now I know how she felt when i kissed Karli in front of her. That thought made me feel like shit, all she did was hug Aiden and I was about to shoot him in the head. So when I kiss Karli…. It must tear her apart. Why did I ever have to cheat? Andi was the perfect girl for me. I know she was always saying that she would never let go; and if I ever wanted another chance it was there….

I ran up behind Andi, I needed to talk to her. “Andi!” she turned around and I could see the tears pouring down her face. Before thinking I pulled her in for a tight hug.

“I know I am to late…. And I hate myself a lot more than I did this morning…. But…. I dumped Karli for you….. And now you’re with Aiden….. “I wonder if she could hear my heart breaking. Did she wonder the same thing when this all happened to her in the beginning? Was I finally feeling what she has been feeling the entire time?

She pulled out of the hug and stared back at me before looking at the ground. “Luke I don’t know what I’m supposed to say, or what I’m supposed to do about you….honestly…” she turned around and started walking away.

“I finally know all the pain you’ve been feeling because of me.” I whispered softly hoping she couldn’t hear me.

No such luck. She turned and looked at me, “Luke… What you felt this morning, what you felt an hour ago, what you felt a second ago…. I can promise you…. It will never be as bad as what I’ve been going through… For 2 months; you’ve been bouncing back and forth between girls…. Even though I have been here telling you that…. as soon as you need another chance…..it’s here…..and you chose to wait until I try and move on…. I pinky promise; you’re never going to hurt as much as me.”

That was like a knife to the throat. “Andi…. I am so sorry I have put you through all this…. And I’m not going to make you feel guilty because I am a dumb ass, instead…. I’m going to wish you luck with Aiden… but remember I love you. And I am always going to love you more than anyone ever will. And no one will ever give me the butterflies that you did.”

I watched as she stopped walking and glanced back at me. She ran her hands through her hair before sniffling. She ran towards me and wrapped her arms all the way around me. “Luke I love you to.” She whispered between sobs. “And no one will ever take the place of my nerd… and no one will ever love you as much as I did…. And I will never stop loving you. And I can promise you another thing…. Those butterflies, you’ve always given me….. Still will never go away.” I wrapped my arms around her and held her tight, I knew this was wrong. I was messing everything up with her and Aiden… but I love her so much it was impossible to let go.

I finally had enough strength to drag myself away from her and give her a small smile. “ok.” I tried to think of something soothing to say; but it wasn’t that easy when your heart was bleeding.

She stood on her tippy toes and kissed my right cheek. “Forever.”

I tried to speak, to tell her to stop. To beg her to come back to me, so I could hold her all night. My cheek had a warm feeling all over it from her kiss. A kiss I would never experience again, but I would never stop missing. And I would never forget. But I couldn’t. As much as I now hated Aiden, I wouldn’t mess up his relationship. And I would steal the girl he was dating even though that girl was the one I am in love with and he knows that…. I guess I’m just not that heartless.

Andi<3
Am I simply supposed to just move on from Luke? He’s been
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