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/> Mrs. Townly: And if I decide to keep you single.

Angelica: Then the reasons against marriage would appear to me to be the best.

Mrs. Townly: What talk, what a tractable spirit. I cannot get it out of you. What? You won't give me the pleasure of knowing your inclination.

Angelica: My inclination is to follow yours.

Mrs. Townly: She won't give up her opinion.

Angelica: I will obey you to the death.

Mrs. Townly: What obstinacy, what an opinionated--

Angelica: It's not obstinacy.

Mrs. Townly: What, you contradict me without stopping?

Angelica: To wish what you wish is to contradict you?

Mrs. Townly: Yes, yes, yes, because I want you to express your will and you won't do it.

Angelica: But Mom!

Mrs. Townly: You make me beside myself. Shut up. They will all say I'm wrong again. Now it's you--yes, it's your spirit, one can call it that indeed--a spirit of contradiction. I don't know how I can live with you. A daughter like this is a real domestic calamity. I want to get rid of you for sure. Yes, miss--I will marry you off today. The two candidates are Edward Richly on one side and Mr. Nelson on the other. I will not give you the honor, I will not give you the choice. You will take the one I choose. I will speak to your father one more time. If his ideas are reasonable, I will agree. If not, no.

(Exit Mrs. Townly in a rage)

Angelica: (sighing) What violence is necessary to turn me into a dissimulator with all the world. I am naturally sincere. But where my mother is concerned I don't dare confide in any one if I'm in a situation where I can see what's happening.

(Enter Mr. Edward Richly)

Edward: Here I am again young lady, and I've resolved not to return to Oxford without having first had an explanation with you. I swear to you your manners make me beside myself. I am furious, worse, I'm no longer in possession of myself. When I think that since the last time I came here neither my love, nor my respect, nor my prayers, nor my reproaches, have succeeded in getting one word out of you. (pause) I can't make any sense out of it. When I spoke to you of the most violent passion that ever was, you listened to me with a tranquility, a languor that was incomprehensible. For women react either with love or scorn or anger to such emotions. Just Heavens, what am I to think of a silence so obstinate?

Angelica: Only that I am prudent and nothing more.

Edward: Do you approve of my love or forbid it?

Angelica: I can't say.

Edward: Always the same indifferent tone.

Angelica: You haven't been able to tell whether I have any inclination for you, right?

Edward: That's what upsets me.

Angelica: Nor have you seen any aversion?

Edward: No indeed. But that's not satisfactory.

Angelica: It satisfies me. For I have need to be impenetrable to your curiosity. Didn't I tell you that I have formed a project to secure my freedom, and that to implement this project, it is necessary that my mother be unable to tell whether I love you or someone else? My father must also be kept from the truth--and therefore you also must be kept in the dark--for if you know it, my father, my mother, and any one who sees you will be well informed.

Edward: You're trying to tell me I'm indiscreet?

Angelica: No, but your vivacity takes the place of indiscretion.

Edward: I know how to control my temperament. For example, from the moment I saw you I felt possessed to such a degree that you wouldn't think it possible. And I swear to you that a word of enlightenment--one little word from you, will make me just as tranquil as you are.

Angelica: But suppose the word is that I have no intention of marrying you?

Edward: Ah, so that is what you dare to tell me? How can I listen to such infamy? Just Heaven!

Angelica: You're not tranquil: would you feel better if I promised never to marry anyone but you?

Edward: If you promised me that--ah! I'd die of delight. Yes, my joy would be so great--

Angelica: So that you would publish that, too. See how your transports of joy or despair give away everything! They would divulge my secret, and from them my mother would know what I want to do: then she would cross me furiously. Thus I find that I am wise to keep you ignorant of my true intentions.

Edward: I can't be ignorant of them, ingrate. They are so plain. So I tell you, I've just learned you will be betrothed to Mr. Nelson, today.

Angelica: That is possibly true.

Edward: And that's why I came here.

Angelica: Well go away, then.

Edward: And that is what has made me understand all your politics. I see you've managed me up to this point because I am friends with your mother. You fear that, irritated by your refusal, I will prevent this marriage.

Angelica: Prevent this marriage! I believe you are a very gallant man to prevent me from securing my advantage.

Edward: No, cruel woman, no. Don't worry. If you are happy with another, I will die, but I will not prevent you.

Angelica: You are ruining my plans already. But I do believe that if I had no inclination for you, you wouldn't try to force my feelings. Do what I want you to do. Don't see either my father or my mother today. I forbid you to appear here. So go, I beg you.

Edward: I obey you blindly, but if you betray me--

Angelica: I cannot betray you, because I've promised you nothing.

Edward: If you betray me you are the most cruel, the most--

Angelica: Oh, if you are going to berate me, wait till I've done something. And I will do something very soon perhaps. Don't be so impatient.

Edward: WHAT! You mean--

Angelica: Here is my father. Leave quickly.

(Exit Edward)

(Enter Mr. Townly from another direction)

Townly: Rejoice, little girl, rejoice. You will be married according to my wishes. I have triumphed and put it over on your mother.

Angelica: Ah, poor papa, I am afraid indeed that--

Townly: (dancing around) I put it over on her I tell you. She just insisted herself that I do what I wish. And I had to appear not to like it for fear she'd change her mind.

Angelica: Once she gets an idea, action soon follows.

Townly: Yes, my darling daughter, the great wealth of Mr. Nelson is as pleasing to my wife as it is to myself. A rich merchant is a treasure for a girl like you who hasn't a romantic thought in her head. True, he's a bit rustic and crude, but he's open, honest.

Angelica: I pardon this crudeness in favor of his honesty.

Townly: Some say he lacks good qualities, but I find he has many. If only he could get away from the habit of saying things which have neither rhyme nor reason. He's a little too familiar, especially with women he's never met before.

(Enter Mr. Nelson sporting a large gold vest, huge cuffs, a big belly; his fingers are covered with rings)

Nelson: Hey, neighbour--well, well, your old lady says that--what didn't she say, that woman? Ha! There's your daughter. Well, well, when shall we get married, honey?

Angelica: I have no idea.

Townly: Not everything's ready yet.

Nelson: Ready, ready, I'm ready. Yes, yes, Angie, I give you my word. Take the biggest ring from my finger--it's yours.

Angelica: We aren't at the altar yet.

Townly: We have to consider.

Nelson: Let's consider, let's consider.

Angelica: We must take precautions.

Nelson: (grabbing her hand) Take, take.

Angelica: While you are deliberating it's better that I stay with my mother.

Townly: Go quickly. We haven't any time to lose.

Nelson: Time is pressing, yes. (squeezing her) Wait, wait, I want to see you again. It makes me feel good. Let's talk about any old thing. Tell me a story.

Angelica: What sort of story do you want me to tell you?

Nelson: Well, tell me, tell me--you're cute, sweety--tell me a little story--

Angelica: It's time that I should go--

Nelson: (still holding her by the arm) Ho, I want you to tell me-- Ah, I love you with all my heart--tell me a little love story.

Angelica: You love me, and I'm obliged to you for that. Story's over.

Nelson: Well, the story's over. Why did you tell me that story? Tell me instead--

Townly: (separating them) Oh, let her go. It really is important that her mother not see her with us.

Nelson: Go then. Go darling. Get ready to be my wife.

(Exit Angelica)

Townly: Let's discuss a little how we are going to manage my wife. For that's the difficulty in our little business.

Nelson: What's the problem?

Townly: Not really a problem, but--

Nelson: Because it's not a problem for me--

Townly: Do you have some expedient to--?

Nelson: Sure, sure. Leave that to me. Tell me, what are you going to do?

Townly: That's the problem, I tell you.

Nelson: You, you, you, are a poor planner. Nothing is so easy.

Townly: Instruct me then!

Nelson: Nothing is so easy. Now how do you intend to go about it?

Townly: That's what puzzles me.

Nelson: But, but, but, me too-- She's a terrible woman, your wife.

Townly: I see we're both too clever and cunning to figure out what to do. But, by luck, I have a gardener who has more clever ideas that anybody in the world. He should be a statesman. A real good head on his shoulders.

Nelson: I've got a good head, too. Have him here and we'll figure it out.

Townly: Here he is now.

(Enter Lucas)

Townly: Well, Lucas, have you been thinking about our business--have you considered what I said to you?

Lucas: Shh!

Townly: Shh?

Nelson: Shh!

Lucas: This gentleman here wishes to marry Miss Angelica, Angelica also, Madam does, you do, and so do I. So the matter's settled.

Nelson: See--it's settled.

Lucas: I say it's not settled. For from the moment she sees that we want it, too--she won't stand for it, not her!

Townly: That's the trouble.

Nelson: That's the trouble.

Lucas: Oh, I ask you if--

Townly: Certainly.

Nelson: What a question.

Lucas: I ask you then if she were unaware that we agree--

Nelson: That's a good idea.

Townly: Very good, Lucas.

Nelson: That's my advice.

Lucas: That's good advice. You must tell everybody so that your opinion's spread by rumor. For my part, I know that your wife's temper is like a whirligig that's always turning one way then another in the wind. Therefore, we must make the wind appear to blow from the West so she’ll blow to the East. Ah, there must be two winds blowing about Miss Angelica. Nelson on one side, and Young Richly on the other. We have only to say that it's Richly we want and she will force this gentleman on us just to cross us. That's my pronouncement.
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