MY HATCH POCKET JOURNAL, BILLY COY [mobi reader TXT] 📗

virgin lose all his virtue on a sixty two year old obese woman, one who was to die the next day? And she died the next day my friends. If liquor could really, and I mean really, be held accountable, I swear I would not have touched another bottle of beer the next time I met my girlfriend for bed time issues, because boy, ever since that day I lost my virginity in such a miserable manner, I was losing it bent low whenever I would be in a comfortable zone with my girlfriend; all she used to say was that I am important, but guys and ladies, bear witness and ask her to say exactly what she means next time.


Whenever I would be fantasizing about her I would standup head strong, pointed like a sharp razor ready for an order to start a war, but sadly and not funny, when she was hot for me, my stupid short guy would choose to get cold on her and lose it all down like a beaten wrestler.

Tell me fellows, why did a friend in need like this short guy in- between my two long legs have to stab me from the front quite like that? What had I ever done to human nature that it had to deny me the fulfillment of sexual healing?

I was a very happy man when I was still a virgin, I could just get to ecstasy by just fantasizing, but then, after losing my virginity in the most brutal way, it was all in pain’s name that I ever had an orgasm. Why did I have to suffer like a one minute man?

That dead old fat bastard must have been to blame. If the deceased could be sued, I swear I would have had that ten years already decomposed old fat bastard face me in court. How could she defile me and even have the audacity to take my virginity with her to the grave the next day? Please, have pity on me, but don’t tell her I said all that when you die too and join her in hell, I don’t want to start being afraid of the dark, at least I still enjoy my sleep at night, and that’s when I can still get a strong hard on, in my girlfriend’s absence of course. I guess there’s something about missing her that really turns me on so terribly.

But my friend, life is a very miserable journey; sometimes I wish I could just fly to heaven, because, trust me, I don’t want to die, but believe me, this life has got to my last nerve. Suicide is not at all a priority in this state of fear because I fear death anyway; how will people, especially my enemies, hear that I died without having my millionth orgasm as I had planned from ever since I


had just entered puberty many years ago. I have to persevere, I know dreams come true, even though Viagra can’t fasten things; it just hardens things for crying out loud.

Let the tears of my sad heart touch you too, because boy, this life is a learning experience. Anyway, last time when I was in a restaurant eating some delicious meal, in came a prettier girl than my girlfriend; I don’t know what got into me, but I acted by impulse, forgive my behavior that day: fellows, can you believe that as soon as this girl had just walked into the restaurant I went over and confronted her and told her that it was because of women like her that I felt like cheating on my nice girlfriend; though she didn’t understand me at first, at least I was making my point; I gave her a hot slap on her soft makeup polished left cheek, and believe me, she got the last laugh. In an instant I got a big and definitely sharp hard on, pointing at gun point, perfectly at her center of love-making, and although she didn’t turn the other cheek as the Bible recommends, for which I bet she was a staunch Christian, good lord, she gave me a hard kick in my groin, sweet Jesus, I never again saw what was around me.

I woke up in a hospital bed the next day, with my dear girlfriend seated right beside my bed, and damn, my short guy was still hands up, but sadly wrapped under a plaster cast. Now I know why my girlfriend was all smiles, yet I was in a critical condition, probably even fighting for my life too, you never know...

Boy, I couldn’t blame her, if it were me, though for ladies it’s hard to see before you undress her, I would have been happy too. I was stiff in the presence of my girlfriend for the first time. And though I broke the plaster cast off with all the metal I could get my hands on in that hospital room, it was worthy it; that day


my girlfriend and I had sex for the very first time in five years of our miserable love affair. And although after the experience I had to go in a coma and stay in hospital for a month because the injuries were multiple after having sex with my girl, at least we were able to pay the price; my girl too was put beside me on her own bed, with multiple injuries somewhere I feel shy to mention, but believe me, those injuries were caused by my long over excited stiff guy.

All thanks to out of control desires, we had to bypass foreplay, I guess that’s why my girl didn’t even get moist enough, and so, she too had to stay in hospital, beside her active man, who else but me! For real dog, I was the new shelf in her town, believe that! I was now calling the shorts; from a lonely cell to a future life of sex.

To all those who thought things don’t happen for a reason, I guess you should now think again; without that whole drama in the restaurant and then hospital, I wouldn’t have reached my goal and become a successful businessman in having babies. Oh, by the way, I’m learned and I know family planning very well. But Well, I still have on kid. I’m not sure, but I know for sure that my wife and I are both healthy. Although we haven’t had another kid in awhile, yet we have not been using condoms or contraceptives, I’m sure we’re still fertile. But why haven’t we got another kid, it’s what we have been searching for all these past six months nights of sweet sex? At least the sex is great anyway.

Do I sound insecure guys? I don’t think so; wouldn’t I be at the police station filing a complaint for being a womanizer now. I am cool, my mama taught me better.


And oh, before I go, I had forgotten to tell you this, remember that girl who got me in hospital with her rudeness on my groin, but luckily made my dream come true, well, she’s the daughter of the “dead old fat bastard” who took my virginity with her to the grave the next day.

The dead old fat bastard’s daughter was supposed to be my first encounter, but the much liquor I had drank that night got her mother to get to the finish line before her, but don’t blame me for her (the old fat bastard) passing, it was an even game, though I lost a bit more. She took my virginity with her to the grave for crying out loud! Have some mercy on me people! I am out!


A LETTER TO MY LOVE Dear Keysha,
I hope you’re fine; that’s what I wholeheartedly
wish for you, you know. It’s been three years now and trust me, I moved on. But what has really got me writing this letter is weird but true; last week I came across this girl whom I thought from appearance was you, so I approached her with joy, still wondering in my mind, “when did Keysha start putting on glasses?” but anyway, it has been a long time; I went ahead and approached her because thinking it was you, I wanted to use that opportunity to let you know that I’m really sorry for how stubborn and stupid I was three years ago.

When I got close to your look-alike, by just looking into her eyes, I realized they had not that bright sparkle that I up-close noticed in your beautiful eyes three years ago when you really


got me on trial in your dormitory room, when you literally commanded me to SAY IT!

To tell you the truth, that day was both the worst of my days at campus because here I was, being confronted rudely by the girl I really adored over anything else in the world, but I can tell you now, though then my pride wouldn’t let me, I felt so heartbroken, humiliated and overlooked, but with time I’ve come to realize that I was to blame, I shouldn’t have let pride stand before what I really treasured and respected with whole my heart; and further on, that was my best day too because I got the chance to look deep into the eyes of the girl I really liked; I’ll tell you this Keysha, I loved looking at your mad face at that point in time, and don’t think I’m just making this up, I really fell for you more from that day.

Anyway, that was it, and I thank God and you for the experience because from it I learnt and never let another chance pass me by when it came along, that’s why I look back at that and thank God for my wonderful current girlfriend; I guess everything happens for a reason anyway, and experience is the best teacher of all.

Oh, let me stop boring you with my life, I wrote to you, so I think I should talk about you. Anyway, looking back then, I was so stupidly conceited and faking to be blind, but in my heart, the truth lay. I want you to know Keysha that I am telling you all this because I want to get it all off my chest; you know I was told by my passed on uncle Jerome that opening up always heals wounds, and so I think I’m following through his words of advice to his nephew, me.

Keysha, I want you to know that you’re truly a wonderful and intelligent lady. I never got the chance to know you, but from


watching you all the time I had the chance to, I got to notice that you were one of a kind woman; sincerely, I had never met such a young lady so cute, gently composed, patient, elegant, perfectly dressed and fresh, persistent, focused and ready to reach her goal without minding about what anybody said or did to stand in her way. I must say, that’s one thing you possess or possessed, because it has been such a long time since I last saw you, and who knows, circumstances or this uncertain world we live in