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chance that you are offered breakfast, eat what is given to you. Do not ask for extras. Be happy that he put forth the effort.

12. When the man stares at you with his arms crossed over his chest, this is your cue to leave. There is no need for further discussion. If you continue to talk, the man will ignore you until you get the hint.

13. If there is no suggestion from the man about a repeat performance, don’t offer to see him again. It’s not happening.

Now that we’ve gone over one night stand rights, here are bedroom rights on the off chance that you are asked back:

1. Do not expect the man to clean you up. This isn’t a romance novel, and men don’t actually do that shit. If you don’t want to sleep in sweat and cum, get your ass up and take a shower.

2. Do not take longer than ten minutes. This rule applies no matter how long you’ve been with the man. Longer than ten minutes is intrusive and implies that you feel comfortable in the man’s home. Longer showers are only appropriate after some massive cock-sucking or when ‘I love you’ has been said. Here’s a hint: you’re not there yet, so don’t fuck this up.

3. Never, under any circumstances, use a man’s razor. If you need to shave, go home or run down to the corner store for supplies. Our bathrooms are not a pharmacy for you to go shopping.

4. Same applies for toothbrushes.

5. Tampons and pads are at no time welcome under the man’s sink. If you have your period, you don’t belong in the man’s house.

6. Cock-sucking is an exception to this rule. Since you won’t be getting any, there’s no need for you to stay, which means no tampons or pads under the sink.

7. There are no household rights given out until there has been a steady amount of fucking between the man and woman. For a man, this is considered at least a month, possibly three. Household rights include: making yourself comfortable in the living room, cooking, sleeping in the next morning, taking longer showers, feeling like you can walk around the next morning like the men don’t have shit to do, asking personal questions about things in the man’s house, and asking to borrow his underwear. If you didn’t come with it, don’t leave with it.

Independence Day

How To Deal With The Independent Woman

Women want to feel like they are independent, that they don’t need a man to take care of them. But as men, we are raised to take care of women as the ‘treasured’ possessions that they are. This is something you need to tread carefully on. Though you may feel the urge to barge in and take over, if done the wrong way, this will only push her farther away from you. On the other hand, she may truly not want your help, and if you barge in, you’ll only end up pissing her off. Ignore those instincts to rush in and save the day, and follow these tips and tricks to get your way when your woman is being a pain in the ass.

When a woman looks uncertain about accepting help, it’s usually because she knows she needs your help, but doesn’t want to seem helpless. What she’s really thinking is “I really need help, and I want you to keep asking me.” If you keep asking, it seems like she’s trying to be gracious and accept your help rather than roping you into helping out. The key to all of this is the trickery. If she’s getting you to keep asking, then it’s making you feel like you’re really doing all you can to help her out instead of being forced into doing it. Yes, she is manipulating you. Take it and run with it. It’s the only way you’ll get to let loose your inner caveman and do the shit that needs to be done.

So, how do you know if she actually wants your help? Pay attention to her face. Does she look like she wants to cut off your balls? If so, do not walk, run in the other direction. Run out that door, and wait at least a good day before making contact again. The minute you make her feel like she can’t handle something on her own, your relationship is over.

Never tell a woman that things would be so much easier if they would let you handle it. That will land you on the couch or get you kicked out.

This is about as far as we’ve gotten in our research. Feel free to add comments down below.

Fertilization

How To Successfully Knock Up Your Woman Multiple Times

So, you want kids, but your woman is hesitant. We’ve all been there. Nature is taking its course, urging us to reproduce, but your woman isn’t quite ready. Well, sometimes nature can be a fickle bitch and you have to help her along. Let’s go over some of the ways around this.

1. The first time should be a total accident. If you purposely get her pregnant the first time, she’s going to be angry with you, especially if you aren’t married yet. This is called entrapment, or the pregnancy version of entrapment. You want her to already be sure about you before you purposely trap her. But for the sake of winning her over to your side, an accidental pregnancy is the way to go.

2. Now that you have her, you want to make sure you keep her. Sure, she’s tired and claims she doesn’t want any more kids. That’s just the hormones talking, and I mean the bad kind of hormones. The ones that are only present after hours and hours of lost sleep. You want that rush of hormones women have right after the baby is born. If she’s not up for a baby right now, you’re going to have to force it on her. No, I’m not talking about raping

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