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this.

Giulia: That’s not going to happen.

Sinner: Why not?

Giulia: Because it’s time for you to go.

Sinner vanishes and I cross his name off the list of people to interview.

Giulia: Well, that didn’t go quite as planned.

Cap

Cap: Giulia, it’s good to talk to you again. It’s been a few weeks.

Giulia: I know. It feels like a lifetime since I’ve spoken to any of you.

Cap: Yeah, well, you know, you move on to a new series, and you have all these new characters. Suddenly, we’re just left out in the dust.

Giulia: That’s not true. You guys are always on my mind.

Cap: Except when you’re writing for these new guys. The Cortell Brothers? Seriously, I’m not sure how Derek’s brothers got their own series.

Giulia: Well, seven hot brothers…that’s kind of hard to pass up.

Cap: Sure. Yeah, I can see that.

Giulia: Besides, I created a whole series around your character. That has to make you feel pretty great.

Cap: Yeah, right up until you ended it. We had a good thing going, Giulia. I’m not sure why you couldn’t keep it going.

Giulia: Well, the series couldn’t go on forever. What storylines could I possibly come up with? Were you going to knock Maggie up again?

Cap: I could have.

Giulia: I’m pretty sure there would be a grenade or two waiting for you in bed.

Cap shrugs like he doesn’t believe it’s true.

Giulia: Besides, I’m pretty sure you’re not going to knock her up anymore.

Cap: Why don’t you just pour salt in my wounds?

Giulia: But it’s exciting moving on. Aren’t you excited to see what happens with your kids when they’re all grown up?

Cap: Okay, well, that’s exciting. I mean, I’m pretty excited to see how Caitlin turns out.

Giulia: I have a feeling she’ll be just like Maggie.

Cap: Yeah, that’s not really a good thing. I’m gonna have to find her a good man, someone that can really handle her.

Giulia: Like you handle Maggie?

Cap: Hey, I can only do as much as you’ll let me.

Giulia: Let you? Aren’t you a leader? I’m not sure I could let you do anything.

Cap: You write me!

Giulia: Do I really? That’s like asking which came first, the chicken or the egg?

Cap: So, you’re saying that we could have kept the series going if we had wanted.

Giulia: That’s not-

Cap: Shit, I have to go talk to the guys.

Giulia: Wait! I wasn’t saying-

Cap gets up and rushes out of my mind as I try to call him back.

Giulia: See, this is what I mean. I don’t really have any control over them.

Cazzo

Cazzo walks in and sits down, scowling at me the whole time.

Giulia: Well, don’t look so happy to be here.

Cazzo: Any time away from my wife is time not well spent.

Giulia: Except when you’re working.

Cazzo: Even that’s debatable.

Giulia: What’s wrong? Are you getting too old for Reed Security?

Cazzo: Not at all. I just don’t like spending all my time with the guys when I could be with the woman I love.

Giulia: That’s really sweet of you. Now I get why Katy loves you so much.

Cazzo: Yeah, about that. Could you stop putting out ads suggesting that I might go after this Katy person and leave Vanessa? She’s getting kind of pissed at me.

Giulia: I’ll have a talk with her and explain what’s going on.

Cazzo: And what is going on?

Giulia: Well, it’s the end of the series and some of the readers are…anxious to have one last moment with their favorite characters. In your case, it’s Katy. Let’s just say the nipple ring is something that really gets her motor running.

Cazzo: Then I’ll take it out.

Giulia: Yeah, I’m not gonna let that happen. Besides, you’re based on a model and in all the pictures, he has his nipple ring in.

Cazzo: So, change the fucking picture.

Giulia: That’s not going to happen. That guy is sexy, and if I changed the picture, I would also have to change a lot about you. You would no longer be the same man. Hell, Vanessa might not even want you anymore. You might be some punk with a man bun.

Cazzo: I would never wear a man bun.

Giulia: Are you sure about that? Because all it takes is the switch of a picture and a few rewrites, and you’re a completely different person. You wouldn’t even be Cazzo anymore.

Cazzo: Well, I can’t say I would miss the nickname.

Giulia: Now that you know what it means, maybe you’ll reconsider how you treat people.

Cazzo: There’s nothing wrong with how I treat people.

Giulia: Well, sure, now. But during your book, you were all broody and mean to pretty much anyone that was around you.

Cazzo: You stuck me in a fucking wheelchair. Was I supposed to be happy about that?

Giulia: You had the woman you loved in your house. Surely that would tempt you to have a more positive outlook on life.

He stares at me for a moment.

Cazzo: All this time, I thought it was Cap pulling my strings, but it was really you.

Giulia: Cap was the one that wanted Vanessa to stay with you.

Cazzo: But you wrote it.

Giulia: True, but very rarely do I actually get to write what I want. Usually, one of you guys runs off and does your own thing. Like something with guns. It’s always with the guns.

Cazzo: Well, it is a security series. If we didn’t run off with guns, there wouldn’t be much point to the books.

Giulia: Luckily, for me, I’m going to write a small town romance. There will be no guns whatsoever.

He smirks at me.

Cazzo: Yeah, I heard about that. Derek’s brothers, right?

Giulia: Yeah.

Cazzo: And you think he’s not going to show up with Hunter at some point and blow shit up?

My mouth drops open as I consider this. He stands and slaps me on the shoulder.

Cazzo: Good talk.

Giulia: Why do I feel like my next series was just hijacked?

Knight

Knight storms in and flips the chair around, straddling it and showing me he doesn’t give a shit about this interview.

Giulia: Thank you for coming.

Knight: Whatever. I have some rules. First, I

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