Love Leaps: A Short Story, Karen Jerabek [snow like ashes TXT] 📗

As I'm about to write her back, my textmessage alert goes off. I glance at my phone and it's Sam. “GoodMorning Gorgeous.” Seriously, why couldn't he have put forth thiseffort when we were together? Why do they always seem to want whatthey can't have. I'm pissed off at him too right now, so I don'tanswer. Screw Sam and screw Gray.

“That's exactly what I need,” I write backto Jessica. “I'll come over to your place Friday around 7pm andwe'll have a fun girls night out. I need to stop thinking,analyzing, and obsessing about Gray. And, Sam is just an unneededdistraction.”

I trudge through the next couple days atwork, but when Friday afternoon arrives, I'm more than ready tohave a break. Rushing home, taking a quick shower, putting on asome make up and a cute outfit and then I'm back out the door inwarp speed time. My emotions have still been ping ponging for thepast couple days but they're not as extreme as they have been,which is good because I thought I was heading for a nervousbreakdown. I still haven't heard from Gray and Sam's been pesteringme with text messages. You know, a year ago, I would have beenthrilled with this attention but right now, I feel overwhelmed.Tonight, I'm going to try not to think about either of them andjust have a good time with Jess.

“Promise me, you won't let me drone on andon about stupid men tonight,” I say to Jess as she hugs mehello.

“Deal,” she says with a smile. She grabs herpurse off the counter and we head to the trendy Sushi Bar indowntown Raleigh, Sushi Blues.

We're both wearing strappy heels and jeans.She's got a black sequined tank top on and I've got a tangerineorange top that hangs off one shoulder. It's packed when we getthere but we put our name on the waiting list and hit the bar.Several guys have checked us out as we've walked in. Smiling backat them, I'm determined to have a good time.

“Two dirty martinis,” Jess requests from thebartender.

“I'm so sick of talking about myself andthinking about myself, so tell me what's been going on?” I say.

“It's okay, you've had a hard time,” shesays as the bartender delivers our martinis and winks at us.

“Thanks,” I say. “But, tonight, I want totalk about you. Tell me some gossip!”

“Okay,” she says laughing. “You remember myevil boss, Amanda?”

I nod, knowing all too well how she's madeJess's life miserable for the past few months. I'd be ready to cryif my boss yelled at me and blamed things on me but Jess takes itin stride.

“Well,” she starts with a chuckle. “Our bigbosses finally caught her lying and fired her! She was scramblingto cover her tail and try to do damage control, but it was toolate. Everyone saw what a two faced liar she is, and when sherealized she was caught, she acted indignant about the whole thing.It was hysterical. It's been unfolding over the last coupledays.”

“Wow,” I say with a laugh. “What was shelying about?”

“She was so stupid and used her companycredit card to go out to dinner with her boyfriend but she said shewas actually having a work dinner when they questioned her abouther expense report. They interviewed all of us in the department toverify her story and no one had any idea who she had dinner withand no one covered for her. She was livid. I'm guessing there weresome questionable other charges that made them keep their eye onher. So now that crazy bitch is gone.”

“Cheers to that!” I exclaim and we clinkglasses.

Our table is ready and we get up from ourbar stools to head to the dining area. A few of the guys sitting atthe bar, look us up and down as we get up. It's flattering to benoticed. Although none of them have talked to us or even made anyeffort to get our attention. Not that I really need the hassle ofany other men in my life right now.

The restaurant is still buzzing and it'swall to wall people. I didn't realize it was such a hot spot. Iknew it was good but I generally have come during the week so Ididn't know how popular it was on the weekends. We browse our menusand pick out several sushi rolls to share.

“Have you thought any more about starting todate again?” I ask. It's been several months since Jessica andTristan broke up. She never really seemed all that upset, just morenumb. I kept trying to get her to talk about it but she alwaysshrugged it off.

“I don't know,” she says while she sips hermartini. “I've thought about it.”

“Don't you think it's time to get back outthere?” I gently prod.

“Maybe,” she says with a weak smile. “I'mjust not like you. I can't bounce back easily. You're stronger thanI am. I still feel so...damaged.”

“I'm not stronger!” I exclaim. “I'm anemotional wreck.”

“Yeah,” she admits. “But where you deal withyour emotions, I just shut them off. I don't know that I want tolet someone else in.”

“You don't want to live your life alone,” Iremind her.

“No,” she says wistfully. “I don't. But, Ialso don't feel ready yet.”

“I wish I could shut my feelings off,” Isay. “I hate feeling like a blubbering mess all the time where I gofrom feeling depressed to being furious to crying my eyes out, allwithin fifteen minutes! I feel neurotic.”

“At least you're feeling it, dealing with itand moving forward. I can't seem to do that,” Jess says.

“Maybe you should try journaling or maybesee a therapist,” I offer. It makes me sad to see her isolatingherself and not allowing love into her life because she's scared ofgetting hurt again. She's one of the sweetest, kindest women Iknow. “Any man would be lucky to have you.”

“Em, any man would be lucky to have youtoo,” she says and offers me a big smile.

“I'm so glad we got together tonight,” Itell her. “I really needed it.”

“So did I,” she says. “There's nothingbetter than hanging out with your best friend, sharing awesomesushi and having some girl talk.”

“Definitely,” I say. “Cheers to us!”

After