The Player or the good guy?, NotWithoutMusik . [an ebook reader TXT] 📗

Maybe I could just make out with a random guy, because I would never tell Remus that I loved him. That would be way to embarrassing. 

"Let's go downstairs then.", Aya said and pulled me up from my bed. I wore a tight black dress with a golden ging around my neck, while Aya preferred a red dress. Both of us had some fake blood on our face and also fake teeth. 

When we came downstairs, it was already very full. Everyone was dressed up, even though some just took their broom with them and said that they were a witch or wizard. I saw some pumpkins, ghosts, monsters, but mostly vampires. They were just the sexiest scary halloween monsters. 

"Hey, guys.", James said, pulling Lily after him. He was a ghost and she was dressed as a crazy scientist, with her hair everywhere. She still managed to look good though.  They both smiled at us and Lily offered me her drink: "In case you might need it." I thankfully accepted and then drank it all at once, because I had just seen Remus, talking to Isabella. 

"I think I might do this now.", I said and Aya looked from me to Remus and then back. "What? Option number one or number two?"

"Wait, how do you know there's an option number two?", I asked and confusingly looked at her, but she just smiled: "I am your best friend, idiot." I smiled back and then, without being able to control it, I walked towards Remus and Isabella. They seemed to be just talking normally, but I had to do everything possible to keep them from kissing. On my way, I took a glas from Peter and emptied it just like Lily's. It burned like hell, but I just ignored it. I needed the alcohol to get myself together. 

"Remus, hey. Could I talk to you for a minute?", I asked and couldn't even bare to look at Isabella. She looked really pretty with her nurse outfit. I guess she played my victim tonight. 

"Sure thing! What's up?", Remus asked, but I couldn't tell him here, in front of everyone.  So I just pulled him with me, pulled him towards the stairs of the guys dorms. "Can we go up?", I asked and he nodded, obviously noticing that something was up. So we walked upstairs together and when we reached the dorm of the guys, he locked it with a spell. 

"This must be really important.", Remus said and before I could even say anything, he just hugged me: "You know that you can tell me anything, right? And I would do anything to help you with it." That was it, he was just being too sweet to me. I just couldn't hold my tears back anymore. 

"No, why are you crying?", Remus asked and gently pushed me away to look into my eyes. "You can tell me, what's wrong?"

"I- I.", I tried to say, but it was just too hard and so I just pulled him closer to me again. Why couldn't I tell him this, what the heck was so hard to say? 

"I think I got really jealous when you kissed Isabella.", I blurted out and I pinched my eyes, as if I could just disappear right now and make my words unsaid. But instead of laughing at me or giving me a weird look, he gently pushed me away again and looked into my eyes: "Did you now? Well I got really jealous when you kissed Sirius."

"This has nothing to do with him!", I tried to defend myself, but he just shook his head: "Scar, I was actually trying to make you jealous."

"You were? Why on earth would you-"

"-well because... because I love you."

My mouth dropped open. Did he just say what I think he said? Did he just say that he loved me, just like I loved him? And then his face came closer and closer to mine and finally our lips met again. It was such a soft kiss, as if both of us were afraid to break it. I felt so many butterflies in my stomach that it seemed like I was surrounded by them or even flying. My heart beat so fast that I was afraid he would hear it and my whole body seemed to be electrocuted.  The kiss didn't last long enough, I could never have enough of him, but eventually he pulled away. 

"I have loved you ever since I first saw you, but I was always too afraid to tell you, because you always seemed to fancy Sirius more than me.", Remus said and my heart skipped another beat. I smiled at him and gave him another loving kiss. 

"I don't even know when I started loving you, I just know that it was the worst feeling in the world when you kissed somebody else. It was like you broke my heart into a thousand pieces. "

"And now I will fix it again. I will show you that I will never hurt you, I promise. And I will fix your heart with thousands of kisses, is that too cheesy?", Remus asked and kissed me again. 

"That was the most romantic thing anyone ever said to me!", I said, not able to stop myself from smiling. I gazed into his beautiful eyes and wished that this moment would last forever. That I could just always be with him, that I would never loose him. 

 

 

- 12 -

 

Double double date

Mo- 03. Novemver 1977

 

"This is really stupid.", I laughed and caused everyone to look at me, including Our Professor."What would you consider stupid, Miss Pattegrew?", she asked and looked over her glasses." It would be stupid to interrupt this lesson that is really interesting!", I answered quickly and Aya giggled. Our professor didn't find me very funny, but she had never had the guts or whatever to give any student detention.

"We will continue now.", the Professor said and then did continue with her lesson."We have to do the double date!", Aya whispered and smirked at me while she pretendet to write something down."We haven't even been on a real date yet and I don't know, he is a little shy about all this.", I stuttered, hoping that Aya wouldn't detect my lie. Actually, I was the one afraid of an actual relationship since I had never been in one. I mean, I did kind of date a guy in third grade, but I didn't love him like I loved Remus.

"Oh, come on, Scar! You know you are the scaredycat!", Aya mocked, making me blush."You are right. Of course. I am scared and I don't even know why. It's just so weird to ..""- to have found your soulmate? To show the world that he is yours? Scar, this is your chance at happiness."Somehow she was right. With Remus I would at least have my love life under control, and I would only have to worry about my brother becoming a deatheater and me not being able to do anything about it. I couldn't even turn Dalton in because -"Scar! You're bleeding again!", Aya screamed and the whole class looked at us again. My blouse was slowly turning red where the dark wound was."I'll go to the hospitalwing!", I said, holding my arm and storming out of the classroom. Damn this stupid wound. I ran into an empty classroom and put my blouse up to look at the wound, but all I could see was a bloody scar.

***
"I can't believe you talked me into this.", I smiled as I looked at my outfit in the mirror. I wore a long black skirt with a green sweater and black high heels from Aya. She also braided my hair and put my make-up on. I loved this outfit, but I would have never worn it, if my best friend hadn't dressed me for my first double date. She herself wore a dress that had a white top and a pink bottom, separated with a black belt. To not freeze in the cold autumn air, she used a spell on the dress to be extra warm. Plus, she wore her nice winter jacket."Let's go downstairs, Remus and Fabian are probably already waiting.", Aya said and pulled me to the exit of the dorms."Have fun, you two!", Ash shouted after us. She stayed home tonight, reading a new book about Quidditch that she had bought in Hogsmeade last weekend. 

When Aya and I walked into the common room, I could feel that everyone was staring at us. But all I cared about was Remus. He stood there, with his blue winter jacket and his eyes were practically glowing. I bit my lip and took the hand that he offered me. Together the four of us left the common room, ignoring the wolf whistles of James and Peter. Peter tried hard to look unconcerned and happy, but his smile never reached his eyes anymore. Since he had always been the quiet one from the Marauders, nobody really noticed the change and the three boys thought that he had girl trouble. But tonight I wanted to think about me, only me. I knew that it was selfish, but I just felt like I needed at least one evening off, and I deserved it. Soon there was the Quidditch match against Slytherin and I was already shitting my pants at the thought of facing Dalton and Lucius on the quidditch field, not to speak of the pressure from James. 

"Scar, are you with us? What would you like to order?", Aya asked and I snapped out of my thoughts. My night. "Uhm, I would love a butter beer and the dish of the day.", I answered and looked around the bar. The three broomsticks had always been my favorite pub, and their butter beer was the best in Hogsmeade. "Ha! See who is there!", Fabian laughed and pointed at a table for two in the back of the bar. No other than Sirius and Marlene were sitting there, talking while they held their hands over the table.

"HEY, BLACK! Come over here!", Fabian shouted and ignored the awkward look that Remus and I gave each other. This was going to be so weird, on the same table with the guy that kept us apart for so long on our first date. I could see how Aya punched Fabian, but it was too late: Sirius already saw us and smiled, walking over to our table with Marlene behind him."Hey, you guys! What a coincidence! This is like a double double date now!", he said and pulled two more chairs to the large table, for him and his date to sit.

"Hey, guys.", Marlene almost whispered and I could see that she was as comfortable as I was.

"Hey, Marlene.", Aya smiled.

The evening went really well despite everything that I had thought and in the end, I really was sad to leave the pub. Outside Aya was freezing, so Fabian gave her his Jacket on top of hers, making her look like a marshmallow on legs. But she didn't seem to care, she was in the arms of love. Just like me and Remus. We walked behind the two other couples, his arm around my shoulder and mine around his hip. 

"Hey, I've been thinking.", Remus started and